How do you deal with Depression?

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Dick Whitman, Nov 24, 2012.

  1. Dick Whitman

    Dick Whitman Commodore Commodore

    Sep 2, 2008
    I never posted in this part of the forum but Trekbbs for years. I guess I am doing this because know one really knows who I am. Like on Facebook they would know exactly who I am. Using the name I have has a lot of meaning for me, not just because I like that show.

    I mean severe depression. I will probably regret posting this later. Maybe I won't and won't even post. This is not just the cause of one event. Its possibly hereditary. My grandmother was bipolar.

    In the past I tried to get help and I never got a real diagnosis. Usually from the professionals and family I get "You need to try harder." In life, in everything.

    In the last few years I have done that. Become very motivated. I made so progress, maybe a lot. But under the surface there has always been the sense of having no idea what I was trying to achieve. Its hard to be motivated, to even want to get out of bed when you have no desire.

    Problems? I have trust issues, with anyone.
    self doubt, Its impossible for me to deal with anything new without worrying endless. SO I don't do try knew things much.
  2. Kestra

    Kestra Admiral Premium Member

    Jul 6, 2005
    Medication, cognitive behavioral therapy, exercise. I'll probably write more later but I'm on my way out. I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone and there's no reason to regret posting about this. :)
  3. thestrangequark

    thestrangequark Admiral Admiral

    Aug 8, 2006
    Brooklyn thestrangequark
    I think that what works is different for everybody, and in my own experience, can be different for the same person at a given time in his or her life. As Kestra said, self-treatment, like with exercise, medication, and therapy are all good options to look into. I have bipolar 1 disorder. For me personally I have found both medication and cognitive behavioral techniques (I say techniques because I've never had therapy, but rather use techniques I've learned from my own education in psychology) have both worked well. While I credit medication for saving my life (bringing me down from a major manic episode and also bringing me up from a major and suicidal depression), I did find that for day-to-day living medication was too much for me, and I can manage my bipolar well with daily exercise and other behavioral techniques.
  4. Misfit Toy

    Misfit Toy Caped Trek Mod Admiral

    Feb 11, 2002
    Transporter buffer
    My wife has Bipolar Type 2, and proper medication, therapy and some pretty tough lifestyle decisions have been key for her. The mix of meds is an ongoing concern. Any changes to the routine are handled carefully.

    This place will offer you a lot of support - and that's a good thing - but you should talk to a mental health professional too. :)
  5. Gaseous Anomaly

    Gaseous Anomaly Bonzo Premium Member

    Oct 21, 2005
    Hanging out
    I think I'm one of the few lucky people I know, I don't have depression that I'm aware of.

    I guess I'd seek professional help if I did feel depressed. I know several people who take medications, some it works and some it doesn't. I do know that it can be trial and error on what meds will and won't work. I wish you good luck and will say a prayer for you.
  6. Lindley

    Lindley Moderator with a Soul Premium Member

    Nov 30, 2001
    Bonney Lake, WA
    Give EMPower a try:
    No prescription needed. It may look like a quack remedy, but it helped me a lot.
  7. TrekNut87

    TrekNut87 Captain Captain

    Jan 23, 2007
    I was just recently put on medication for Anxiety, OCD and chronic insomnia and I also have a history of depression. In conjunction with the medication, I'm also seeing a therapist every two weeks for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. So far it's been very helpful to me, but I echo the previous posters, seek professional help. Everyone responds differently to the various treatments out there. I'd set up an appointment for an evaluation with a doctor or psychologist and then go from there.

    You're definitely not alone in your struggle. We're here to support you. Good luck. :)
    Last edited: Nov 25, 2012
  8. propita

    propita Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Mar 9, 2001
    fresno, ca, us
    There are a lot of people on this board who are familiar with depression of various sorts, either their own or someone they are close to. You will not be belittled here.

    I was diagnosed with dysthymia in my 40s, low-grade chronic depression. NO self-confidence; NO self-esteem. Every new challenge was NEW; I had no carry-over feeling of accomplishment. Physiologically impossible. So my efforts "try harder" only led to frustration and further emotional issues.

    That's what happens to many people with other types of depression, too. Because all your efforts cannot always overcome something with a physiological cause. So see a professional who will offer to address the physiological cause, if any, but will also provide advice on what you CAN do that will help (cuz "try harder" ain't gonna cut it when you've been trying your whole life).

    Best of luck and don't be afraid here.
  9. Maestro

    Maestro Vice Admiral Admiral

    Jul 3, 2004
    I gave up "dealing" with it years ago and saw my doctor about it. His diagnosis showed that I suffered from clinical depression, and I've been on 30 mg of Lexapro since.

    Discovered this summer that I also suffered from Obstructive Sleep Apnea.

    Between now getting healthy, sufficient sleep, and taking a seratonin reuptake inhibitor (Lexapro), I'm a new man, and just discovering how amazing both I and this world are.

    Don't deal, get treated. And don't be ashamed to GET TREATED.
  10. Warp Coil

    Warp Coil Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Mar 15, 2001
    MD, USA
    I really think the best thing to do is to seek professional help. Go see a doctor who can properly evaluate and diagnosis you. This may be depression, but it could also be something else. Let them steer you to the right treatment plan.

    This sounds familiar. I definitely suffer from these symptoms, though I do not suffer from depression. I've got my own special issues, though.
  11. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    May 20, 2005
    Heart of Dixie
    Social Security checks and building stuff outside. If that doesn't help, I fight Germans.

    (In seriousness, I can only second Kestra's answers. Chemical imbalances not withstanding, I've learned that depression is often an example of as you think, so you become..)
  12. Dick Whitman

    Dick Whitman Commodore Commodore

    Sep 2, 2008
    I appreciate the advice. I could give a lot of details perhaps I will in time. I thought I had overcome most of this in recent years. Than last fall a lost of serious shit happened.

    In October of 2011 I was in a bicycle accident. I suffered massive head trauma. I am an atheist and I still am. Most people would say my recovery was miraculous. Other than no strong memory of the accident or the week after I had total recall of everything. I did not need to relearn to walk or talk. But my boneflap was removed because of swelling and was replaced last December,

    I had never been in a hospital since my birth. But for someone who always had anxiety issues it was overwhelming to deal with this. Just simply having to be told when I could eat or go to the bathroom.

    I am still not sure what really happened. Two days before this my only serious girlfriend broke up with me. On top of that a month before I had to move back with my parents to save money. That bothered me more than anything. Her timing, she knew hard it was for me to date at all. But to break up when I was living at home.

    Was it suicide? I don't think so. But I was being reckless in how I was riding. Maybe on some subconscious level it was. I was conscious when I was found on the road and in the hospital. I was told I was swearing at everyone and trying to pull out all my needles. I don't remember.

    My earliest memory after was a dream in which I was locked in a restaurant at night and was not allowed out.

    When my short term memory returned, a week later, my big concern was who was going to pay for the bills. Not my condition! The state of Wisconsin payed for it until April and than when I was well cut me off. So no follow up.

    More than anything all this revealed to me real weakness I always had. I had trouble with some of the therapy not because of the accident, but because of problems I always had. I have wanted to return to school but howI can pay for it or will I be able to deal with the stress.

    The day I was hurt,before my ride my sister and I talked on the phone about me moving to Las Vegas by her. I can't stand my parents. I lived with them way too long. A lot of my issues stem for that. Having to deal with them after the accident all the time was the worst. I had to pretend I love them so I could get out. Or at least I felt that way.

    Anyways I was VERY motivated to get out of the hospital as soon as possible and to return to work. Probably sooner than I should have. Than to save money to move by my sister. Well I did that in July.

    Now its like, what do I do now? I have no friends here. I never really had friends at all. I got an ok starting job. But not enough to be able to have a place of my own or a social life.

    I been trying to put the past behind me for years. Ok I did that. Now what? I have no idea. Thats fucking scary. Most people have something they want. I just try to get by.

    The physical pain is very close to gone now. I was told it would take about a year.
  13. rhubarbodendron

    rhubarbodendron Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    May 1, 2011
    milky way, outer spiral arm, Sol 3
    I don't think it was a conscious or subconscious suicide attempt. In a country where weapons are so easlily available there'd have been numerous more effective ways. I think you were just absentminded.

    Yes, the Murphy effect (problems coming in groups), can trigger a latent depression and I'm afraid you'll never get beyond that. You'll recover but it'll always be lurking, ready to strike again. It's a constant fight and you'll get thinner skinned the older you get. Don't worry, though, you'll compensate by being more experienced in life and in dealing with problems.

    The most important thing to do now, imo, is to try and find a better job. Don't quit your current one before you got a new one! It's far easier to find a new job out of a current one than it is to get a job when being unemployed.
    Another thing is to get into contact with people and making friends. Las Vegas with its many tourists might not be ideal but there must be some local cultural life. How about attending evening classes? That's a great way to get to know people who share your interests. Or if you play an instrument you could join a band? Or a choir, if you are a singer. If you like board games, how about putting up a note that you're looking for a few like-minded people for a regular game evening?
    If you have a dog or can borrow a neighbour's, take it for a walk - dog owners quickly get into contact over their animals.

    Perhaps some poster here is from your area and would like to meet? Put up a note in the RL meeting forum :)

    At any rate, by coming out and posting here, you've taken the first and most important step away from the isolation and towards others. And you'll see that you are not alone. Many of us have been there, done that, picked and spun the cotton for the T-shirt :) And thanks to the time difference, there'll always be one of us online if you need to talk.
  14. Deranged Nasat

    Deranged Nasat Vice Admiral Admiral

    I'm sorry to hear that you've been having problems with depression. It's a very serious illness, and if you're in a position to get treatment for it, I'd really urge you to do so. Even knowing you have support can make a real difference to your mood, and your sense of your ability to cope. I've been in a state of on-and-off depression for years, starting at least when I was about 11. I've recently learnt that I'm probably type-2 bipolar, and I have agitated depression or dysphoric mania. I was in a state of that for a few weeks just now (indeed, it prompted me to start a thread very much like yours, Donald Draper).What you say about constant worry and difficulty in dealing with anything new is familiar to me, and I know it can be a real obstacle when it comes to making the most out of life.

    One of the biggest trials of depression is the sense that life is overwhelming, that you just can't handle it. Rather than being a functioning part of the world around you you see life as an exhausting series of never-ending hurdles and so you withdraw - from other people, from meaningful activity, from all aspects of the world. But of course isolation and inactivity make the condition worse. In my case, I also have the manic agitation that (when it comes on) keeps me in a state of dread and panic, a sense that I'm wasting my life and have to accomplish things and have to live my life to the full, so I become melodramatic about being depressed.

    Another familiar thing you're saying, Donald Draper, is the disappointment that comes when you lapse into depression after believing you've moved beyond it. The sense that your development or progress was meaningless, that you'll have to fight it off can contribute to the overall problem because it's quite the crushing blow, particularly if you're someone who places much importance on self-improvement. But the illness can be managed, and you can come to a much better place with help and the desire to make the most of it. If you go for treatment, you should be able to meet with behavioural therapists that can encourage you to resume activities and social interactions that will improve your overall mood, and you can be introduced to cognitive exercises that will help manage your anxiety and the automatic thoughts that provoke it.

    I'm glad you moved in with your sister and got away from an environment you felt was oppressive or uncomfortable - it's really important you have a place where you can "retreat" to after dealing with the outside world, and if home isn't a good place for you it's much harder to improve your overall mood.

    Please, keep us informed of your progress, and never be afraid to ask for help. Like the others have said, you're not alone here and you have no reason to regret posting. :)
  15. SmoothieX

    SmoothieX Vice Admiral Admiral

    Jul 12, 2004
    It's nothing a weekend in Tijuana with a handle of whisky and a stolen cop car won't solve...

    I've had anxiety issues at times. Talking to your doctor and seeing a therapist can really help work through these things. The stigma isn't there anymore.
  16. Kemaiku

    Kemaiku Admiral Admiral

    Dec 23, 2004
    Northern Ireland
    Three years of that here, and it's been very helpful to me also. I was lucky to find two very good doctors though, friends with other problems have had a far harder time finding doctors who are willing to really help.
  17. rhubarbodendron

    rhubarbodendron Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    May 1, 2011
    milky way, outer spiral arm, Sol 3
    I live in a small country town - there's no specialist here and I don't have a car :( It's not easy to deal with it alone, but so far I have managed, with a little help from my friends.
    My job requires me to drive a lot and to move in difficult terrain - taking medication would be out of the question as it'd influence my reaction time. Accidents would inevitably follow. Therefore I take chocolate instead ;). I lost my depression but gained a few lbs. Not really a bad bargain, if you ask me.
    Also, there's this actor I adore and who has such a pleasant voice. He has a video diary and I copied all entries and all interviews with him I could get to mp3 and put them on my walkman. It helps me a lot when I am nervous or under stress. It's like talking with a friend.
    My job keeps me to busy/tired to go out and make friends. After 5 years in this town I still know only colleagues and the staff from the shops and restaurants I frequent. That's going to change in February when the new semester starts, as I intend to take evening classes (either Italian or French - haven't made up my mind yet) and maybe find a few friends there.
  18. Tora Ziyal

    Tora Ziyal Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Feb 27, 2010
    Donald, you've already gotten lots of good advice, so I'll just wish you well and comment on this:
    Maybe (or maybe not, of course). Years ago when I was severely depressed, I did a lot of foolish stuff like crossing streets without looking. It took a while, but I eventually recognized that I was kind of passively suicidal.

    Actually, firearms are used in only about half of suicides in the US.
  19. rhubarbodendron

    rhubarbodendron Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    May 1, 2011
    milky way, outer spiral arm, Sol 3
    interesting. Here it's very difficult to legally get any, so most people crash their cars, throw themselves before a train or drown themselves. I find the first two to messy and I certainly don't want to die with wet hair, so I'll be around another 50 years, I guess :D
  20. Dick Whitman

    Dick Whitman Commodore Commodore

    Sep 2, 2008
    My first experience with therapy was in 2000. Nice woman but she seemed be too focused on current issues in my life at the time. Not really understanding the picture long term issues.

    Than I moved and it was a while before I saw someone. Than i saw this guy for over a year. I never really liked him. Looking back I am not proad with how I acted toward him. I really vented on him, I mean real rage, for everything. But some of it was deserved. I stayed on for so long because he said I would be part of a job assistance program. But it was discontinued and he waited to tell.

    I tried medication. Never seem to do much. Like I said I never got a diagnosis. While I do have a family history, more and more I think its mostly situational.

    In general I am suspicious of medication. I don't drink, smoke do anything. Mostly because I was the stereotypical geek as a kid and did not social like that. Plus I always figure I have a hard enough time controlling how I feel and concentrating having outside substances would make it harder.

    So given the accident I had, you can imagine the amount of meds I was put on. It was a shock for someone who never took anything. Now I am on anti seizure meds. Those have been slowly reduced. I need to see a specialist soon. Hopefully I can be take off the stuff completely.

    After seeing that last therapist 2006 I starting volunteering at local Art Museum. Mostly working with kids. That did more for me than therapy ever did. I did not get a driver's license until I was 28. But that changed things. I got a job out of the family, got a personal behind the wheel teacher. About 4 years ago I lost around 100 pounds.

    I did over do it though. Over the course of 2010 working out took over my whole life. It was way of proving to others and myself I could do anything. I eventually I leveled it off.

    The last year has been hard because I have to really limit my physical activity. Now things are close to normal that I can start again.

    Yeah, I need friends. Thats always been the great mystery of life to me. I never been good at it. I been trying. Even posting all this is an attempt.