Stephen King was a pussy for not really opening up into this complete bunk.
Did I miss the explanation in the beginning where they explain that it's cloudy to the point of fog %90 of the time because of strange weather + geography? They're not afraid of the sunlight. like Vorlons they can't be seen because every one would recognize them. Fuck twilight! Sunlight makes them so beautiful you can't help but get hard and wet for these deushy little sucks producing veins for their approval since to see them is to love them... The name of this pretentious wank movie doesn't make a lick of sense!
Did I miss the bit where she explains why she doesn't dance? I left the room to mop vomit for a little while but she says she doesn't dance and then later the final showdown is in her childhood dance studio! I was out of the room, but fuck me, why do I think that this crucial explanation about why the girl is so fucking introverted was cut for a longer montage about how love means watching some one sleep? And for all the use of negative space and emotive sighs, they had a montage about Edward and bella "talking" as if showing that the two of them were capable of conversation wouldn't sit well with the wankers into this trip who believe that love at fist sight lasts forever and never has to be justified no matter how long you think you can coast on just having perfect hair.
Poor Elizabeth Reezer. Her character in the lead of the DOOMED the Ex List was also called Bella. That's got to be fricking haunting for her, to be lurked after forever by people asking the actress about the wrong Bella. All though, her hair looked fabulous for once.
the vista in the beginning were painful. the isolationism was distressing, the arrival of the cool kid vampires all dressed in white looking less inbred and 80s than everyone on the set was just goading... Christ on a bike there was no story! Life was miserable so they fell in love for no reason and then they had a baseball game and met a psycho who tried to kill her for no reason and then he failed and they didn't turn her into a vampire so that she could go to the prom. it doesn't take 2 hours to play out those events.
Imagine Scoobie doo fell in love and married a scoobie snack?
Ed fell in love with her because he couldn't read her thoughts after he spent a month being pissed off that he couldn't read her thoughts. Make up your ind is a women who can think sexy or the pits? As if it was something she doing to personally to bait him being mildly more imperceptible them cheese changing colour. Freaking fang tease. And y'know, from listening to her diary entries/thoughts/voiceovers, Eddie is so fucking lucky that he can't hear her mundane art school drop out wank wank thoughts because he would take a knife to his throat to get away from such drivel... maybe she doesn't think? having a brain so devoid of spirit that it can't summon create a narrative after telling it's arms and legs what to do is quite humbling to know that it is stupid people who get the most action sexually because they're too thick not to walk away. It was infinitely more pleasant on True Blood when Sookie fell in love with Bill because he didn't have thoughts flying out of his head pounding her continuously, and it was explained that he had no electricity in his brain so of course she couldn't read the electrical signals in his brain. See! that's how you tell a story. Explaining why things work!
I knew this was going to be a chick flick for virgins, but COME ON! i assumed that it was going to be Rosewell meets Romeo and Juliet, but come on! I was watching something else today and they said "No one remembers where star crossed lover meet, just where they die." Well what a fucked ending! the gorgeous red head who was thrown off Life on mars and Snuk with Four Kings, What about Brian and Swingtown was just about to lay down a smack down broad style but no, ending fucking credits after Beautiful Bella thinks to herself Fuck you Edward I did too want to be a vampire! ...Okay her language was much cleaner but fuck fuck fuck what a tepid maw of indisputably. Eye rape. I must sue.
Did I miss the explanation in the beginning where they explain that it's cloudy to the point of fog %90 of the time because of strange weather + geography? They're not afraid of the sunlight. like Vorlons they can't be seen because every one would recognize them. Fuck twilight! Sunlight makes them so beautiful you can't help but get hard and wet for these deushy little sucks producing veins for their approval since to see them is to love them... The name of this pretentious wank movie doesn't make a lick of sense!
Did I miss the bit where she explains why she doesn't dance? I left the room to mop vomit for a little while but she says she doesn't dance and then later the final showdown is in her childhood dance studio! I was out of the room, but fuck me, why do I think that this crucial explanation about why the girl is so fucking introverted was cut for a longer montage about how love means watching some one sleep? And for all the use of negative space and emotive sighs, they had a montage about Edward and bella "talking" as if showing that the two of them were capable of conversation wouldn't sit well with the wankers into this trip who believe that love at fist sight lasts forever and never has to be justified no matter how long you think you can coast on just having perfect hair.
Poor Elizabeth Reezer. Her character in the lead of the DOOMED the Ex List was also called Bella. That's got to be fricking haunting for her, to be lurked after forever by people asking the actress about the wrong Bella. All though, her hair looked fabulous for once.
the vista in the beginning were painful. the isolationism was distressing, the arrival of the cool kid vampires all dressed in white looking less inbred and 80s than everyone on the set was just goading... Christ on a bike there was no story! Life was miserable so they fell in love for no reason and then they had a baseball game and met a psycho who tried to kill her for no reason and then he failed and they didn't turn her into a vampire so that she could go to the prom. it doesn't take 2 hours to play out those events.
Imagine Scoobie doo fell in love and married a scoobie snack?
Ed fell in love with her because he couldn't read her thoughts after he spent a month being pissed off that he couldn't read her thoughts. Make up your ind is a women who can think sexy or the pits? As if it was something she doing to personally to bait him being mildly more imperceptible them cheese changing colour. Freaking fang tease. And y'know, from listening to her diary entries/thoughts/voiceovers, Eddie is so fucking lucky that he can't hear her mundane art school drop out wank wank thoughts because he would take a knife to his throat to get away from such drivel... maybe she doesn't think? having a brain so devoid of spirit that it can't summon create a narrative after telling it's arms and legs what to do is quite humbling to know that it is stupid people who get the most action sexually because they're too thick not to walk away. It was infinitely more pleasant on True Blood when Sookie fell in love with Bill because he didn't have thoughts flying out of his head pounding her continuously, and it was explained that he had no electricity in his brain so of course she couldn't read the electrical signals in his brain. See! that's how you tell a story. Explaining why things work!
I knew this was going to be a chick flick for virgins, but COME ON! i assumed that it was going to be Rosewell meets Romeo and Juliet, but come on! I was watching something else today and they said "No one remembers where star crossed lover meet, just where they die." Well what a fucked ending! the gorgeous red head who was thrown off Life on mars and Snuk with Four Kings, What about Brian and Swingtown was just about to lay down a smack down broad style but no, ending fucking credits after Beautiful Bella thinks to herself Fuck you Edward I did too want to be a vampire! ...Okay her language was much cleaner but fuck fuck fuck what a tepid maw of indisputably. Eye rape. I must sue.
