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Formal etiquette (Dinner Related)

tomalak301

tomalak301

Fleet Admiral
Premium Member
Tonight I went to a Winter Benquet at my old school in which various firms were there to meet with people and network in order to find a job. It was a very good evening, but I noticed something odd and was wondering if this was normal. It was a Dinner type thing and on the menu was Chicken, Fish, or Veggie and each dish included pasta, and zucchini. Well, I pretty much cleaned the plate (It was a delicious dinner) but everyone else at my table had the servers take it with more than half a plate of salad (Which was the appitizer) and half the plate of the dinner and I was sitting there almost feeling like a pig. Is it proper etiquette to not finish the meal and only eat half of it? I don't think it's coincidental that everyone at my table and quite a few people who attended the event to have not eaten very much and say they were full. Either that or I was the hungriest person in the entire room, but I just wanted to be sure.
 
Are you in the US? I don't know if it's considered etiquette there, and I've never heard of it as etiquette here in the UK. When I'm dining at these kind of events, I usually end up leaving a load of food on my plate. It's generally because I don't find the catering to be to my taste, and I think, subconciously, because I don't want to look greedy.
 
WillsBabe said:
Are you in the US? I don't know if it's considered etiquette there, and I've never heard of it as etiquette here in the UK. When I'm dining at these kind of events, I usually end up leaving a load of food on my plate. It's generally because I don't find the catering to be to my taste, and I think, subconciously, because I don't want to look greedy.
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I am in the US. Didn't think about the greedy aspect. However, while the food was catered, delicious food is delicious food. I guess I'm a sucker for anything, as long as it's edible and somewhat looking healthy.
 
Was it men or women who were generally leaving food? I don't know for certain but I wonder if it's more likely to be women than men who left the food?
 
Maybe the people you were with were not hungry. You did nothing wrong. Food is meant to be eaten.
 
I don't think there's strong etiquette either way; if the portion you're served is more than you want to eat, that's just the way it is, you aren't obligated to stuff yourself. Although where I'm from, a waiter would likely ask me if there was a problem with the food if I don't finish the plate. (I guess that's "counter-etiquette" from the waiter-side)

OP probably just has a healthier appetite than most people. ;)
 
If it was a buffet then this could turn into a longer discussion.

But you were served, right? There's nothing wrong with eating everything in that case. They just weren't hungry. It doesn't mean anything.
 
Yeah it means nothing - it's just in January lots of people are starving themselves because they are on some fad diet.
 
tomalak301 said:
Is it proper etiquette to not finish the meal and only eat half of it? I don't think it's coincidental that everyone at my table and quite a few people who attended the event to have not eaten very much and say they were full. Either that or I was the hungriest person in the entire room, but I just wanted to be sure.
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You didn't do anything wrong. Unless you were shoveling food in your mouth quite disgustingly, you're fine. I'm one of those people that doesn't finish all my food at formal dinners and I always feel like a jerk. But I have my own reasons as I suppose the people sitting at your table did. And you shouldn't worry about it, really.
 
The chefs make the food for people to enjoy, and to eat. And some of them work really hard to get it out there to you guys. So I dont see why you shouldnt eat it like it was intended to. There's always going to be someone who doesnt finish, but as far as Im concerned you did nothing wrong. Unless, like Kes said, you were shoveling it down like it was the last thing you ever did.
 
I don't think you did anything wrong. You were hungry so you ate. They probably were no longer hungry so stopped eating. That or their New Year's resolution is still in effect. Chances are if the even was in February you would have noticed a difference. ;)
 
Some people will leave food on their plate because they think it shows that they weren't given enough food if they clean their plate, but where I come from it's considered insulting not to clean your food, because it shows that you didn't think the food was good. That and where I come from we don't waste food by throwing it away, so we eat what's on our plate unless we simply can't eat anymore, or unless we can take the remainder home (ala a "doggy bag").

During my time in the Air Force, though, I learned to never go to a banquet hungry if I could help it, simply because the food usually sucked. Once I got a steak served to me that was barely seared on the outside but was raw otherwise - it literally bled as I poked it with my fork.
 
At these sort of things, when you only get 2 or 3 choices, I usually don't eat much just because I'm a picky eater. There is a good chance I don't like what is being served or the way it has been cooked. I will still eat some to be polite, but I don't clear my plate.

I rarely finish my salad or other appetizers because if I do then I will not be hungry enough to eat my entree. I've noticed other people doing this as well. I love salad, but I just can't eat it all (or even most of it) if I want to eat the main meal.

Also, I don't like vegetables and veggies seem to take up a huge amount of space on a plate for some reason, so even if I eat all my meat it looks as if I've eaten hardly anything.

Although I am probably pickier than most, there are a lot of people that do the same things I do to a lesser degree. The only person I know who always clears anything on his plate, including all appetizers and desserts, is my dad.
 
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