Fix an episode---Way to Eden

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ Now THAT would have been an improvement.

 

[ZapBrannigan]

Also the notion of a "planet Eden" concept needed to be revamped.

That part never made sense. "Eden" is just the name of a place in the Bible. The idea that it was a distant, separate planet comes out of nowhere. And the idea that you could locate it using star maps, based on knowing its biblical name, is beyond preposterous.

What were they thinking? It's worse than the fast-and-loose "leaps of logic" often seen on Lost in Space.

 

[Push The Button]

Also, have Sgt. Joe Friday the sixth from The Federation Bureau of Investigation on hand at the end to lecture the hippies before taking them into custody. "Yeah, you're pretty high and far out right now.."

 

[ZapBrannigan]

Also, have Sgt. Joe Friday the sixth from The Federation Bureau of Investigation on hand at the end to lecture the hippies before taking them into custody. "Yeah, you're pretty high and far out right now.."

That's good. The hero who's smart and right, but quintessentially unhip.

 

[MANT!]

Replace the musical interlude with a much better one..

 

[Hatshepsut]

So remove the hippies and it’s not bad at all in outline form. Simply change them from hippies to cultists. Let’s be honest--that’s what they actually are. Just don’t say you like the episode exactly as it is!

It strikes me as a direct aim at the counterculture Left from what would have been the point of view of President Kennedy were he still alive in 1969. The TOS Star Trek, while optimistic regarding the human future and progressive on race and gender equality, was hardly kind to the Left's agenda. The Federation's member societies still emphasized conformity. I think the animus went beyond charismatic cults to a general dislike for values contrary to a disciplined Protestant work ethic, and it shows in other episodes as well. Sevrin's followers don't seem brainwashed: They fully agree with his goals and cooperate toward achieving them, failing only to see the disastrous outcome.

So there's not much to be fixed. I won't endorse it exactly as is, because Adam's (Charles Napier) outrageous costume and come-on certainly could use a bit of subtlety. Yet the deadly vegetation the hippies meet at the end serves as metaphor for what Star Trek's producers felt this movement would lead us to were it to become politically ascendant. Nor did the thing ever really die out as we imagine: Parts of its belief system have been mainstreamed in New Age religion, vegan diets, and drum circles while the radical element has taken on a more explicit focus against global capitalism, as seen at the Seattle WTO protests in 1999. Only drug use has fallen out of favor. Hence we can't quite declare the plot outdated.

 

[ZapBrannigan]

Nor did the thing ever really die out as we imagine: Parts of its belief system have been mainstreamed in New Age religion, vegan diets, and drum circles while the radical element has taken on a more explicit focus against global capitalism, as seen at the Seattle WTO protests in 1999. Only drug use has fallen out of favor. Hence we can't quite declare the plot outdated.

It's tragic, but the values of Kirk and Scotty will probably become extinct before those of Dr. Severin, and that means modernity will fall. And as "The Way to Eden" symbolically predicted, what comes afterward won't be pretty.

Lisa Simpson once defined what a hippie is: "You're lazy, self-righteous, and the soles of your feet are jet-black." An industrious civilization can support some useless people, but when enough of the population walks away from productive values, forget it.

 

[CrazyMatt]

My re-write of the script to "The Way To Eden"

A small craft, which looks like a Tholian dart with small nacelles, is being pursued by the Enterprise)
SPOCK: It is definitely the stolen space cruiser, Captain, the Aurora. I read six aboard.
KIRK: Hailing frequencies. Aurora, this is the USS Enterprise, Captain James T. Kirk commanding. Acknowledge. Aurora, this is the Enterprise. Do you read me?
PALMER: They are receiving us, Captain.
SPOCK: I read no evidence of malfunction.
KIRK: Repeat. Federation orders to detain you for
SULU: They're veering off, sir.
KIRK: Change course. Pursue and overtake.
CHEKOV: Aye, aye, sir.
KIRK: Stand by tractor beams.
SULU: Standing by, sir.
CHEKOV: If it continues on course, it will enter Romulan space.
KIRK: Engage.
SULU: Tractor beam engaged.
KIRK: Bring them in.
SULU: They've not cut power, sir. They're struggling to escape.
SPOCK: Their engines are seriously overheating, Captain.
KIRK: Aurora, cut power. You are overtaxing your ship.
SPOCK: Power approaching critical. They cannot continue.
KIRK: Emergency power to tractor beams. Bridge to Transporter room. Scotty, are you ready to transport?

[Transporter room]

SCOTT: Aye, Captain.

[Bridge]

SPOCK: Power beyond critical. Explosion is imminent.
(The little ship glows red)
KIRK: Are we within transportation range?
CHEKOV: Not yet, sir.
(the little ship explodes)
KIRK: Well, that settles that. Mr. Chekov, resume course to our next assignment. Mr. Sulu, ahead warp factor one.
CHEKOV: Aye, Captain, resuming course.
SULU: Warp one.

Episode fixed.

(Thanks chakoteya.net)

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

It totally needed more singing. Heck, just make the whole damn thing an operetta.

 

[plynch]

Nothing to fix. I mean it.

 

[PCz911]

. In fact, their singing was a ridiculous insult to CSNY.

.

Do they sing on CSI: NY?

(joke. A bad one. Sorry)

The clothes and the singing kill me. With that being said, I did transcribe the "going to Eden" song. It's great to play at parties or between songs in a set. Sung with mock seriousness , for those people who know.... Then again, that's probably a bad joke too.

 

[Push The Button]

Oh, you have to leave the singing in just to see Charles Napier rocking out in that ridiculous outfit. Such a contrast with the tough-guys and bad-asses he would play later in his career.

 

[CrazyMatt]

Oh, you have to leave the singing in just to see Charles Napier rocking out in that ridiculous outfit. Such a contrast with the tough-guys and bad-asses he would play later in his career.

Thank god they hadn't invented the Speedo back then....

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Fix the episode by turning all of the hippies into characters like Tucker McElroy.

"You're gonna have a hard time findin' Eden with no fuckin' HELM!"