Fix an episode---Way to Eden

[Grant]

Fix an episode-----Way to Eden

What you say? It can’t be fixed--it’s beyond repair! Well “we reach“, but I shall try….

First what is wrong with the episode…..

Hippies, hippies and hippies.

So remove the hippies and it’s not bad at all in outline form.

Simply change them from hippies to cultists. Let’s be honest--that’s what they actually are. Severin is a cult leader and they buy his anti-technology rhetoric.

If you simply cut out the silly costumes, the jam session and the nutty chants and antics--it works pretty good.

Keep what works…..
The enterprise pursues a stolen ship, it fights the tractor beam, is destroyed and the cultists are beamed aboard. They turn out to be (as in the episode) gifted scientists and privileged young people who have rejected technology.
They wear identical robes or outfits instead of flower power garb.

They insist on being allowed to go to Eden, Kirk refuses.
Instead of acting up they pretend to behave and by taking advantadge of the “kid gloves” orders Kirk is working under, they scout out the ship.

Spock tries to reason with the once admired Severin, but finds him insane as the other cultists plot to take the ship using Irina to gain knowledge of Auxillary control from Chekov.

They distract the crew with something other than a lame jam session (they are geniuses after all), free Severin and knock out the crew similar to the episode. They land on the planet and it plays out mostly the same.

All you need to do is replace about 5 minutes of the jam session and other parts where they act silly and it’s not a bad concept.

I would suggest that since they go to the trouble of having it take place in Romulan space--that a few minutes be added near the end where Scotty detects Romulan ships on long range sensors (stock footage!) closing fast and going to red alert. Kirk rescues those still alive, transport up to the ship and beat it out of Romulan space in the nick of time.

You go from non-threatening hokey adversaries---hippies---to inherently creepy adversaries---cultists and instead of embarrassing and silly it’s kind of menacing.

End it with these people need to be “deprogrammed” instead of “you are seeking the right thing--only you shouldn’t be killing starship crews and starting wars!!--I’m looking at you Tongo Rad--you knew those sound waves were deadly. Tsk, tsk.”

That was an anomaly of 1960s TV--Tongo Rad KNEW Severin’s sound waves were deadly and was complicit in attempted murder of 430 people and apparently got away with it!

As far as I’m concerned, these minor changes turn it from a bad episode to a pretty decent 3rd season episode.

Agree or disagree…….
Just don’t say you like the episode exactly as it is!

 

[Green Shirt]

Ditch the goofy "being correct" dialog between Chekov and old girlfriend.

 

[HarryM]

I would probably go back to the original "Joanna" script, it sounded more interesting. McCoy pissed at Kirk for making moves on his daughter is more interesting than Space Hippies.

 

[BillJ]

This is one that I don't find as bad as I use too. Yeah, the premise is pretty silly, as is the planet where everything looks normal but is nothing but acid. But, I tend to prefer Star Trek not take itself too seriously.

Though the one thing I would fix, the half open doors to the crew lounge. Scotty is really slacking on basic maintenance.

 

[Grant]

The premise is actually really good---the execution is awful.

The premise of educated, intelligent young people being misled by a charismatic cult leader and since their parents are influential Kirk has to give them a large amount of freedom onboard.........

is really good.

Why he let Lazarus, the gorgon's kids or Lokai and Bele wander around is idiotic.

Then given their intelligence and their freedom on the ship plus Chekov's old girlfriend duping him into telling her about auxillary control--it's not a huge leap to say they find a way incapacitate the crew and get to Eden.

 

[JJohnson]

Yeah, the space hippies episode didn't age well. I'd have to watch again, but I agree with your changes. Make it the cultists specifically radical in their beliefs, and go out of their way to condemn Kirk for things like eating meat, or McCoy for using drugs to cure, or Spock for being unemotional, etc., pretty much alienating everyone, kind of like some radical leftists do in the United States today, or even back then did. Could be a morality play on not taking your political beliefs too far.

 

[Grant]

Yeah, the space hippies episode didn't age well. I'd have to watch again, but I agree with your changes. Make it the cultists specifically radical in their beliefs, and go out of their way to condemn Kirk for things like eating meat, or McCoy for using drugs to cure, or Spock for being unemotional, etc., pretty much alienating everyone, kind of like some radical leftists do in the United States today, or even back then did. Could be a morality play on not taking your political beliefs too far.

Yeah, they could have even re-used the lawgivers robes from "Archons" and they would have seemed very scary almost instead of laughable as the episode probably seemed as early as 1972.

 

[T'Girl]

More on the follows being "children of privileged" would have been an interesting change, have Spock give a mini-bio on each of them.

 

[Grant]

More on the follows being "children of privileged" would have been an interesting change, have Spock give a mini-bio on each of them.

Right, one is an expert in astronomy (locating Eden), another is expert in starship design (stealing the Aurora and taking over the Enterprise), another is an expert in psychology (getting the crew to divulge sensitive information without raising suspicion)----besides Severin being an expert in acoustics (Hee-hee the guy with the funny ears is an acoustics expert!!)

Their gifts would make them formidable as opposed to silly.

As for the suggestion of just keeping the "Joanna" script.......

My theory, such as it is, is that TPTB rejected Joanna for some strongly held reason and they probably weren't going to go back to it.
My premise is that they look at the script near the finish line and say---"maybe if we made these minor changes-the episode would be better or more believable."

 

[Zaminhon]

A lot of the complaints are that the Space Hippies should be cultists, instead. For me, there was no doubt they were cultists and Severin was sort of Manson-lite. They are not above murder to reach their goal. A little different than the "Flower Child Hippiness" variety.

 

[BillJ]

A lot of the complaints are that the Space Hippies should be cultists, instead. For me, there was no doubt they were cultists and Severin was is sort of Manson-lite. They are not above murder to reach their goal. A little different than the "Flower Child Hippiness" variety.

This.

They gave me a creepy vibe because they come across as these peaceful kids dressed in flower power clothing (what would a 23rd century hippie look like anyway?). When they are actually willing to do whatever it takes to get to Eden.

 

[Melakon]

It's Sevrin, with one E, thank you.

 

[Grant]

A lot of the complaints are that the Space Hippies should be cultists, instead. For me, there was no doubt they were cultists and Severin was sort of Manson-lite. They are not above murder to reach their goal. A little different than the "Flower Child Hippiness" variety.

I said in the opening post--they were cultists.

But having them dress as flower children makes many people dismiss the episode as silly, dated and hokey.

Ominous, intense looking people in some dark robes would have made the episode seem a lot more serious minded.

There was ONE reason they had them dress as they did and have a jam session---to pander to 1969 audiences.

A lot of TOS holds up---this episode doesn't and is often mocked and said to be terrible.

I don't think it is---I think they took a good outline and a good premise and wasted them.

 

[Melakon]

Ominous, intense looking people in some dark robes would have made the episode seem a lot more serious minded.

There was ONE reason they had them dress as they did and have a jam session---to pander to 1969 audiences.

I was 18 when it first aired in 1969, and thought the space hippie clothes looked pretty ridiculous (though William Theiss used contemporary fabrics), and the songs sounded like something on an old Lettermen's album, not contemporary rock or even folk rock of the time.

But to put them in dark robes as you suggest is such a cliche, it would immediately telegraph them as evil bad guys.

 

[Wingsley]

The hippie aspect of the show wasn't really a problem for me.

Maybe they could chant instead of sing. They certainly chanted well enough. ("NO GO! NO GO! NO GO!") The singing was cringe-worthy. They would never be confused with CSNY. In fact, their singing was a ridiculous insult to CSNY.

This episode's writers and producers needed to find a way to establish that these hippie characters came from credible backgrounds so the viewers could believe that this wasn't just a silly band of kids somehow taking over the ship. Saying that Irina dropped out of Starfleet Academy wasn't enough.

The biggest problem of all (for me, at least) was that this "Eden" planet was located in Romulan space, and somehow the Enterprise is hijacked and taken there without incident. We never saw any Romulans. Why was it necessary to incorporate that into the plot? The Romulans we saw in "The Enterprise Incident", "The Deadly Years" and "Balance of Terror" would have detected Enterprise's intrusion and attacked immediately.

Also the notion of a "planet Eden" concept needed to be revamped. The notion of a single world that could be a motherland for all species doesn't make sense. It would be different if a civilian probe found a habitable planet outside Federation space without any human inhabitants, and if this world somehow figured into space legend as some great oasis, far removed from the rest of the settled Galaxy, that would appeal to hippie/rebels looking for a new home.

Unlike others here, I liked the idea of the indigenous plant life being dangerously acidic. It's about time TOS showed a planet with plant life that wasn't automatically useful to human needs. Why should every Class M world automatically be a paradise waiting for human settlement?

I agree with others here about the stilted and silly dialogue between Chekov and Irinia. "Be correct" underscored that this episode was written and produced by people who had no clue how to write hippie/rebels. It also made the young rebels seem way too child-like.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

I admit I'm curious as to how a planet whose native plant life is so dangerously toxic, could have developed an atmosphere that's breathable by humans...now I admit I know precisely sod-all about biology, but wouldn't a planet with toxic plant life eventually develop an atmosphere that's just as toxic?

Feel free to throw some serious science at me if I'm wrong, which I might be...

Oh, and another thing: The hippies in this ep are so gung-ho about founding their own society, and living exactly the way they want to...if I were Kirk I would have said "Okay, so how about giving US some slack? Has it ever occurred to you that we live in a technological society, and operate starships which explore the galaxy, because we like it? If you get to live the way you want to...so do we."

 

[Grant]

I was 18 when it first aired in 1969, and thought the space hippie clothes looked pretty ridiculous (though William Theiss used contemporary fabrics), and the songs sounded like something on an old Lettermen's album, not contemporary rock or even folk rock of the time.

But to put them in dark robes as you suggest is such a cliche, it would immediately telegraph them as evil bad guys.

Well we agree that the episode got dated pretty darn fast!

I see nothing wrong with having the cultists seem "evil" from the get-go. In the episode as aired Sverin is quickly shown to be a bad guy or insane or both.

When I suggested robes I was simply naming something "off the shelf" that wouldn't have broken the budget.
My premise is that the changes we suggest should have been something affordable at the time and not some pie in the sky wish list--like a fight with Romulans at the end.

I concur that the Romulans should have shown up as the ship leaves the planet and follows it to the neutral zone.

My theory is that in taking out the 3-4 minute jam session would require something to takes its place--like a chase from the Romulans. (using stock footage)

 

[BK613]

I find the whole planet-side part of this ep most in need of fixing. "His name was Adam."

 

[Kemaiku]

I admit I'm curious as to how a planet whose native plant life is so dangerously toxic, could have developed an atmosphere that's breathable by humans...now I admit I know precisely sod-all about biology, but wouldn't a planet with toxic plant life eventually develop an atmosphere that's just as toxic?

An awful lot of Earth's plantlife and even several fruits are dangerously toxic to humans. If they landed on certain parts of our planet and immediately ate the first thing they saw, there's a chance the same thing would have happened.

 

[Marsden]

Not to mention if they landed in the Arctic and a polar bear et um up. burp