Facts About Captain Robau

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Robau Trekking across the universe,
On the starship Kelvin, with XO George Kirk,
Robau Trekking across the universe,
Only going forward, 'cos he is just badass.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

If Captain Robau ever yells EAT PHOTONS AND DIE BITCH at you, your pretty much fucked.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

If Captain Robau yells *anything* at you, you will never know what, because his voice alone will kill you.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

If Captain Robau yells *anything* at you, you will never know what, because his voice alone will kill you.

But just to make sure he will still Photon Torpedo your ass out of existence.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Captain Robau LIKES Enterprise. Say something about his taste, I dare you.

He of course refers to the 2102 remake.

The original can grok his glands.

 

[Aragorn]

After Berman and Braga promised a valentine to the fans and failed to deliver, Robau made sure that they never worked in Star Trek ever again.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Facts About Captain Robau can fill a book the infinite size of the multiverse.

 

[AdmiralGarak]

Facts About Captain Robau can fill a book the infinite size of the multiverse.

The Cliff Notes version is written in fire in letters thirty feet high on the far side of the Quentulus Quazgar Mountains, and is written over top of some boring message which Robau scratched out.



(+5 Geek points for getting the reference.)

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Captain Robau approves of the Hitchhiker's Guide reference.

 

[cooleddie74]

Captain Robau approves of Faran Tahir. He's his favorite actor.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Captain Robau once considered Vin Diesel, Bruce Willis and Chuck Norris for the role of Captain Robau. He killed them for incompetence when he saw Faran Tahir.

 

[cooleddie74]

Faran Tahir is actually Robau's great-great-great-great grandfather.

 

[Aragorn]

The asteroid belt between Jupiter and Mars was actually a planet. Robau accidently destroyed it when he sneezed.

 

[Deranged Nasat]

The asteroid belt between Jupiter and Mars was actually a planet. Robau accidently destroyed it when he sneezed.

Robau doesn't have accidents. If that planet was destroyed- and it was- Robau wished it so.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

If you give Neil deGrasse Tyson shit about Pluto, Captain Robau will fuck your shit up.

 

[cooleddie74]

Captain Robau coughing is the reason Pluto's orbit is so f'd up.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

Captain Robau makes super novas by lighting his farts on fire.

 

[cooleddie74]

Captain Robau wins all the candy contests. His collection of Golden Tickets is even bigger than Wonka's.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

Captain Robau came out of nowhere lightning fast and kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy ass.

 

[EnsignRicky]

Two men enter, Robau leaves.