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Every Butt Hurts

Peacemaker

Vice Admiral
Admiral
Seriously...my hometown wants to clean up the cigarette butts all over town, but really, did the local nonprofit have to call the campaign "Every Butt Hurts?"

So - many - jokes...

I say we repair damaged manhole covers...We can call it "Every Hole is Sore."
 
Wow...I wish the City of Atlanta could make enough progress on their 'to-do' list to reach the point where they could start worrying about cigarette butts. :(

Silly slogans aside, to live in such a place sounds pretty good to me!
 
Who did they get for the focus groups? Twelve-year-olds?

Probably these guys.

71cast.jpg
 
^ Reminds me of this...

Tim Kazurinsky: [ laughs ] You know. I thought I could trust The New York Post. Under the leadership of Rupert Murdoch, the Post has given us such memorable headlines as.. [ holds up newspaper ] "THE SHIEKS HIT THE FAN!" And.. "KHOMEINI'S KAMIKAZES." And, my personal favorite: "GRANDMOTHER DIES OF AIDS." So, yesterday, when the Post came out with the headline.. "ANDROPOV DEAD".. I was shocked! It's clear, it's concise, it's factual. In every way, it's a departure from what I've come to expect from The Post. They even spelled his name right.

What happened? Why didn't they report Yuri's death like this: [ holds up fake headlines ] "RUSSIA GOES TOPLESS". "IRON CURTAIN CALL". "YURI STIFFS RUSSIA". Or.. LENIN GETS ROOMMATE". Where, I ask you, are the bad puns? [ holds up more fake headlines ] Like: "FLU 1, YURI 0". "VODKAPUT". "ANDRO-POOF". Don't tell me that the Post fired the lousy poet who wrote headlines like: "HOW-NOW-MOS-COW".. "BURY YURI IN A HURRY".. "REDSKY DEDSKY".. or "STINKO PINKO SINKO".

[ holds up the real "Andropov Dead" headline again ]

Is this the new New York Post? What can I say? The thrill is gone.
 
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