ARCHER: I had a weird dream last night you poisoned me and became Empress of the Terran Empire, whatever the hell that is. So I guess I'm uninviting you to dine with me in the Captain's Mess tonight.
ENT Caption Competition #004 Let's Talk About It
- Thread starter Tenacity
- Start date
ARCHER: I had a weird dream last night you poisoned me and became Empress of the Terran Empire, whatever the hell that is. So I guess I'm uninviting you to dine with me in the Captain's Mess tonight.
T'POL: Are you eating the last piece of pecan pie? Commander Tucker was looking forward to inhaling that at the end of his shift.
REED: Commander Tucker? This is a poker match. Not a buffet.
REED: Old sci-fi movies always get it wrong, don't they? When crewmen are ejected into space they immediately explode in the vacuum in freeze-dried exsanguination. . Actually a man can survive two minutes before cardiac arrest occurs. Long enough to get a transporter lock on him.
HOSHI: I think all my phobias have returned.
REED: Old sci-fi movies always get it wrong, don't they? When crewmen are ejected into space they immediately explode in the vacuum in freeze-dried exsanguination. . Actually a man can survive two minutes before cardiac arrest occurs. Long enough to get a transporter lock on him.
T'POL: I've contacted HR about your refusal to stop giving me tribble bikinis.
REED: Rumour has it that Dr Phlox makes tribble bikinis in his spare time. And gives them to members of the crew he fancies. Did any of you receive one?
@IMC Headquarters
Archer: "YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME! Whew! Dang, that felt good to say."
Sato: "..."
Archer: "Sorry. Nightmare. Still getting over it."
Sato: (reaching for panic button)
Archer: "YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME! Whew! Dang, that felt good to say."
Sato: "..."
Archer: "Sorry. Nightmare. Still getting over it."
Sato: (reaching for panic button)
REED: You can tell Chef's in the sickbay. I've had better lasagne after the inertial dampers failed on the Hood at warp three.
Trip: Testing testing, is this thing on?
Reed: -sigh-
Sato: It wasn't funny 500 times ago, it's really not funny now.
Mayweather: I'm just jazzed about being on the show, man.
Archer: I need to tell a joke in Andorian to impress the Ambassador. Can you help me?
Sato: I'm really busy, captain. Fine. We'll need a fork and a vegetable. Let me go find Trip.
T'Pol: And the Vulcan Meditation Master inquires of the family, "What is this bizarre vignette called?" to which they reply "The Aristocrats." You are not exhibiting signs that it was humorous, Doctor. Did you not find it funny?"
Phlox: chews silently
Archer: Now, I get it! So the fork was like a microphone. That's a good one, Trip.
Vulcan Spy: Dinner was 2 hours ago, Captain.
Archer: "How does that old saying go again? 'Beware' something..."
Tucker: "'Beware of Vulcans bearing gifts.'"
Archer: "Yeah, that's it."
T'Pol: "Humans. Draw their name just once in the Secret Santa exchange and you never hear the end of it. What's so bad about a giant IDIC wall hanging, anyway?"
Archer: Look, I need the translation completed, a transcript and contact Admiral Forrest through the subspace interference.
Hoshi: Nobody puts baby in a corner.
Monk: My pet sehlot enjoys the coolness of this room, strange she usually here.
Archer (rubbing tummy): Yep that was some good eating.
TRIP: Just putting some shrimp in your plomik soup.
TRIP: Brother, can you spare a dime?
TRIP: Nice oufit. Do y'all wear P'Jemas here?
Trip: "Aren't you a little old for a ringbearer?"
T'Pol: "Do you feel a draft coming from that window?"
Phlox: "We'll know in a moment."
Archer: Well, Trip, it seems that Mudd's Mail-Order Brides, LLC screwed up your order. Instead of a shapely Orion slave girl you got a rather mono-toned sounding Vulcan.
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