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Contest: ENTER DS9 CapContest 130: Luck o' th' Irish

Smellincoffee

Commodore
Commodore
Is it possible? Can pictures be found of....GOOD things happening to the Chief? We'll find out after these exciting new winners!

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First, a little classic humor from Triskelion:
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Quark: What is it, girl? Rom fell down the old gravity well?

Tharpdevenport visits the Eternal Argument...
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Nog: "No, NO! You're not getting it! Clearly Springfield lies in a state over here!"
Soldier: "But Flanders said Ohio, Nevada, Maine and Kentucky border it."

JirinPanthosa merits the Cruel and Unusual Punishment Award:
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SOLDIER: Is this necessary? Why are we singing show tunes to them?
CARLSON: They need to understand how great American culture is. Keep singing!

Nerys Myk takes us Honky Tonkin':
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CAPTAIN: Our next stop is Bob's Country Bunker. They have both kinds of music, Country and Western.

Timewalker's Billions and Billions of Bubbles:
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Man on left: I can't make heads or tails of what they're arguing about. The tallest one insists on talking to somebody named Roddenberry. The next tallest wants to talk to somebody named Carl Sagan.
Man on right: What about the short one?
Man on left: Says he wants root beer.

And finally, Tisk getting a little meta:

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Soldier: They're looking for a first run edition of a science fiction story by some guy named Benny Russell.
General: Ah crap, they're nerds.


Thanks to all who participated! This week we're looking towards St. Patrick's Day, so why not throw a little love the chief's way?

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WOMAN: But can't you just teach us to think super-brave thoughts whenever the dal'roc shows up? We're not pathetic sheep children who need a demagogue to tell us bedtime stories, we're adults who are perfectly capable of managing our own psychic energies!

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O'BRIEN: Psst. Doesn't she look a little like a younger Keiko? Oh Yeah.

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O'BRIEN: Remember honey. Always run into dangerous caves by yourself, then peer haphazardly over every cliff. Nothing bad could possibly happen.

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QUARK: I've got your bar tab. When are you going to pay?
BASHIR: Oh yeah, I'll just pay you on pay day.
QUARK: You're Starfleet, you don't have a pay day.
BASHIR: Like I said. I'll pay you on pay day.

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O'BRIEN: I've made the figurines. Now I just need to make up a complicated rule set for how they fight each other. Computer, replicate me some dice!

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O'BRIEN: Oh my God...it's the writers! I have to hide before they hurt me again!
 
Thanks to all who participated! This week we're looking towards St. Patrick's Day, so why not throw a little love the chief's way?

Woman: "Diaper changing time, cheif."


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O'Brien: "OH yeah, TITs galore over there ... I banged her rotten."

Sisko: "Cheif, she has uncurable space herpes."



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O'Brien: "No, I am not the decendant of Mr. Potato Head."


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Quark: "Ah, cheif, I'm going to need that drink back that I gave you a few minute ago."

Bashier: "You mean that drink?" pointing.

Miles: "I just finished slammin' it. Why?"

Quark: "That was Rom's 'special mix' for a rude customer..."

Bashier: "You don't mean from ... the lower tap?"
 
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O'Brien: Was that..? No, it couldn't have been! Leprechauns aren't aliens! Maybe I'll just stand here and watch a while, just in case. It was right at the end of that rainbow over there...
 
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Bajoran: Would you please bless my child.

O'Brien: Oh, Holy Crap-

Bajoran: Thank you!

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O'Brien: (to audience) They say no technology can work on this planet. Get ready for the Chief of Operations to do his magic.

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O'Brien: I'm so proud of you, Molly.

Molly: For what, daddy?

O'Brien: For being a normal kid who doesn't age from 6 to 19 in 3 years!

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Quark: Morn finally spoke!

Bashir: What did he say?

Quark: "Why do all of your jokes start with the punchline: 'And then the Andorian says?'"

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O'Brien: Ah-ha, I found it! Wait, it's been removed from it's original packaging! KEIKO!!!!!

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O'Brien: Next time Captain, I choose the golf course.
 
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O'Brien: In a world far from civilization, the fate of one community rests on a brilliant but humble engineer...
Bashir: Do you always narrate the beginning of holograms, chief?
 
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O'Brien: Don't tell these stories, dear. Your brother will think you are full of it, Molly

Molly: But they really happened. Mommy turned into a 12 year old girl. You were imprisoned for 20 years inside your mind. I conjured up the greatest 21st Century ballplayer. A Klingon even delivered me in a bar.
 
T4TWs Smellincoffee!!!
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Heli-Mom: I need an engineering tutor to teach little Shmekly here to play with the phase inducer and not the box it came in!
O'Brien: What you got, a three-quarter inch duo-phase or a nine-tenths flaphead X-4300?
Baby: The X forty three hundred! What do I look like, an idiot?


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Sisko: That woman kinda looks like your wife.
O'Brien: Think I could convince a judge of that?


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Molly: There must be a thousand acres here, why are we all jammed up in each others cakeholes?
Miles: Ask your mother.


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Quark: What'll it be?
Bashir: Give me two fingers of something green.
O'Brien: And don't call Garak over this time.


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Miles: If you think I tormented you in the past, my little friend, wait until you see what I do with you now.
Keiko: MILES! QUIT GOOFING AROUND AND RECYCLE THE GARBAGE!
Miles: I was just seeing if you were still watching.
(Blows Crockett away)


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Com: MILES! QUIT GOOFING AROUND AND RECYCLE THE GARBAGE!
Miles: THERE'S NO ONE HERE BUT US ROCKMEN! WHAT IS A "MILES"?
 
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Next time on Survivor: Star Trek Engineers- The five engineers are left on a desolate planet and they have to find spare parts to make a subspace transmitter. *cue shots of Trip and Scotty getting into a fist fight, and Geordi falling for B'Elanna* Will the LaForge/O'Brien Alliance survive this episode?
 
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O'Brien: If one more bloody person tries to pinch me or get me to sing a drinking song, I'll smack them right in the gob.
 
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Molly: How did you survive Setlik III, Daddy?
Miles: It probably helped that it wasn't set as part of a trek show concurrently.
 
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O'Brien: "You're saying someone named Kirk did this to you?"
Bashir: "The Department of Temporal Investigations is going to be peeved."

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O'Brien: "Looks like Keiko but nowhere near as annoying. I've got my, 'I was drunk and it was dark' excuse all lined up."

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Miles Edward O'Brien, a man with his priorities wired the wrong way. Spends hours playing with Dr Bashir in the holodeck, and hours telling graphic Cardassian war stories to his children.

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Bashir: "I want to try that holosuite program you were mentioning, Quark, but with a tweak. I want to use a certain someone's likeness as the main character."
Quark: "Oh, that's gonna take some permits and clearances. It'll cost you."
Bashir: "Permits! How can you get permission to do a damned illegal thing?! Just name the price."
Quark: "First tell me whose image you want, then I'll tell you the price."
Bashir: "Okay damnit! I want Kira, I want Kira in the holoprogram!"
Quark: "Major Kira!"
Bashir: "Yes, Kira. How can you be deaf with ears like that?"
O'Brien: "I don't think you want to be discussing this subject in public, Doctor."

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The moment that audiences realised that O'Brien was a replicant.

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O'Brien's personal log: "Note to self, don't recalibrate the transporters while hungover. Second note to self. Make first note to self after someone beams me the hell back out of this rock"
 
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Molly: So Daddy, you were locked up in that prison in your mind for what felt like years and years?
Miles: Yes, Molly. But then the commercial ended and Keiko stopped talking when they were dancing with the Stars again.
 
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