Contest: ENTER DS9 CapCon 150: An Offer You Can't Refuse

[Smellincoffee]

Welcome back to another contest, people, and another one of those big round numbers..

Bad Thoughts' "Marchons, Marchons!"

Eddington: Ready? 1, 2, 3, 1 "Do you hear the people sing?/Singing the songs of angry men! ..."
Security Ensign standing out: Why are we rehearsing these old songs?
Eddington: Because revolting against the Federation requires intimate knowledge of Victor Hugo's works in all their iterations, including Broadway musicals.

Leviathan's "Browncoat":

Kira: Ah! Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!


JirinPanthosa's "Always Works in the Movies.."

BOLIAN: What do you think? Can we take 'em?
KASSIDY: Umm...

Nerys Myk "They Wanna Send Me Back to Rehab, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!"

SISKO: Enjoy prison!
YATES: I'm going from from a rickety old space ship and a run down space space station to what amounts a resort in New Zealand. Damn straight I'm gonna enjoy it!
SISKO: Sometimes I wonder about our criminal justice system.

The "It Wasn't an Entry, but Why Not?" award goes to Triskelion:

Bela Lugosi: Computer, end program! Computer, end program! Ah, shit.


And now, this week's entries!

 

[Smellincoffee]

Quark: POWWWWWEERRR! UNLIMITED POWWWWWWERRRR!
Rom: Uhh, brother? That sounded ominous.

Quark: Watch your mouth, Rom!
Rom: But brother, all I said was tax --
Quark: SHHHH!
Rom: Taxonomy is a legitimate science!

Quark: It's not a nursing home, mother, it's an assisted living facility. You'll love it there. And you'll have these handsome fellows waiting on you! Won't that be fun?
Iskah: Zek is the moron, Quark, not me.

Quark: Reach for the skkyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Intruder: Or what?
Quark: There's a snake in my boot!
Intruder: I don't get it. A robot?
Ziyal: A really *cheap* robot.

 

[Nerys Myk]

ROM: Keeping the pimp hand strong, brother.

 

[JirinPanthosa]

QUARK: Wait till they see my new health care plan! Sorry Rom, I'm declaring Stupid a preexisting condition.

ROM: Wait. You're trying to convince me she's male by erotically touching her ears?
QUARK: Umm...

QUARK: I know what this looks like. It looks like I'm making a deal with a famous weapons smuggler.
DAX: No, it looks like you're negotiating cost with a spirits merchant.
QUARK: Oh, umm. Then, it is what it looks like! Yeah.

QUARK: You know Mom, you keep getting stranger and stranger boyfriends.

ZIYAL: Those weren't set to stun?
QUARK: I figured compared to having the shame of being bested in combat by a Ferengi, this was more merciful.

 

[Triskelion]

T4TECA Smellincoffee!

Rom: Turns out Morn's other bodily secretions aren't worth anything.
Quark: Better double check them!
Rom: OK!
Quark: And they said I wouldn't take this job seriously!

Rom: Geez, ever hear of foreplay brother?

Dax: Yo Beavis and Butthead! One of you put on a hat - there's kids trying to eat here!

Moogie: Fascist!
Quark: Moogie, don't be so hard on him. When he was born a Jem'Hadar he didn't know it would bother nudists.

Quark: Go ahead! Make my 26 hour day!
Ziyal: Try again.
Quark: Welcome to Earth.
Ziyal: Wrong, try again.
Quark: I'm too old for this ShiKahr.
Ziyal: Puns aren't very sardonic.
Quark: THIS IS MY JUMJAAAAA STICK!!!
Ziyal: Too esoteric.
Quark: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Ziyal: What?
Quark: Ethan Hunt. Mission Impossible?
Ziyal: Try again!
Quark: Looks like you just punched your last runabout ticket, amigo.
Ziyal: Parroting someone else's irony is just trite.
Quark: I think he got the point.
Ziyal: Wrong weapon.
Quark: I'm your worst nightmare.
Ziyal: Wrong scenario.
Quark: Only you can prevent forest fires.
Ziyal: Now you're not even trying!
Quark: Consider that a divorce!
Ziyal: ...Who are you talking to?

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Quark: "I think the expression on the staff needs to be a little more like this. What do you think?"

 

[Triskelion]

Rom: You'd better not let Human Resources catch you groping the staff again, brother!
Quark: It's my staff - not the staff, you idiot.
Rom: Trust me, they don't like that, either!

 

[Mr Soak]

Tora: you know, if you hold them sideways, gangsta style... Much more badass.

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Quark: "Moogie! How long has it been? Oh, I love what you've done with your...scalp..."
Jem'hadar: "That compliment didn't land, it crashed and burned."

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Ziyal: Why are you holding two mollusks?

 

[Smellincoffee]

New contest by Thursday, because I'm going to Florida this weekend.

Quark: I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or did he fire five. Well, to tell-
(Disruptor blast)
Tuco, offscreen: When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk.

 

[Smellincoffee]

Did I say Thursday?

I didn't say this Thursday.


*cough*

Off to Florida!

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Ziyal: "What are you doing holding those candlesticks upside down?"
Quark: "Bluffing the enemy and failing miserably, thanks to you."