T4TW, Smellincoffee!
What are your thoughts, Kaopectate?
Ahem. That's Kai Opaka.
OK Alpaca?
No, that's a pack animal similar to a llama. My name is OPAKA.
Ah, your name is Opaka. Your job is Lama!
No, that's a Dali Lama with only one "L". My job is Kai, actually.
Only one L? Like the L train that brought us here?
Actually, that's an "El train," which is short for "Elevated Train". But we arrived here in a Runabout.
Ah. The Gingivitis.
No, that's tooth decay. The runabout's name is the Ganges. The Ganges is a Holy river.
Where the Bajorans go to pray and wash their clothes?
No, that's Hindis. On Bajor we worship Prophets.
Like the Ferengi.
No, that's "profits", as in gold-pressed latinum. Bajorans worship for enrichment of our pagh.
Pagh is richest when served live!
No, that's gagh - a Klingon delicacy.
Ah, gagh and shakaar lung.
No, bregit lung. Shakaar is actually First Minister of Bajor.
But he answers to you, Kai Ohniaka.
Oh, we've lapped ourselves. No, Ohniaka III is the planet Lore's Borg attacked. My name is Opaka. And to be thorough, this is is a preemptive "That's 'Lore's Borg', not 'Björn Borg'".
Ah, the same Borg who defeated his friend Minos in the 1976 World Championship Tennis Finals. The hands of fate.
Actually, that's Manos: The Hands of Fate, the Worst Movie Ever Made. And Minos is the planet from The Aresenal of Freedom. Björn Borg defeated Vitas Gerulaitis in four sets in 1976.
No, actually, he defeated Guillermo Vilas in four sets in 1976. Borg defeated Vitas Gerulaitis in five sets in 1977.
In the Stockholm Open, where he was upset by Jimmy Connors?
No, Connors upset him in the US Open. He was upset by John McEnroe at the Stockholm Open.
No, he upset McEnroe at the Stockholm Open.
No, Borg defeated Connors at the French Open and in the 1981 US Open. He didn't defeat McEnroe in the Stockholm Open until 1980.
Hm. Whatever happened to him?
He went mad and attacked the Enterprise.
Uhhnn, you really hate to hear that. Such a champion.
Well, at an early age....
Same old story, really.
So where were we, Mary Kay Cosmetics?
Sorry, that's Kai Opaka.....
Dukat: I'm telling you, Björn Borg was not upset by John McEnroe at Wimbledon in 1981.
Bajoran: But all the historical records indicate McEnroe upset Borg at Wimbledon in 1981!!!
Dukat: Well I'm sorry, but your historical records are wrong. Borg was not upset by McEnroe at that tournament.
Bajoran: I have here a sworn affadavit by the time-traveling Prophets of Bajor that McEnroe defeated Borg in 1981 at Wimbledon!!!
Dukat: Oh, McEnroe beat him. Borg was just not upset about it.
Kira: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
Jake: Not the Borg double-fisted backhand!!! AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH defeated, like Jimmy Connors at Wimbledon in 1981.
Kira: You know who else's star rose early? Annikan Skywalker. Just saying. It happens. But man I'd like to see Vader against Borg. You know, back in their heydays, not now. Not even 1982 Borg, when he lost to Yannick Noah in the Monte Carlo quarterfinals, shortly later announcing he was quitting the game and pulling a Yoda.
...
"Gone Degobah," dude.
Sisko: The Defiant stands alone!
Nog: Just like Björn Borg's 59 titles at the age of 25, and 49 consecutive matches won in any single season, and his 92.72% match winning percentage at Wimbledon spanning 1973 to 1981?
Sisko: Never tell me the odds!
What are your thoughts, Kaopectate?
Ahem. That's Kai Opaka.
OK Alpaca?
No, that's a pack animal similar to a llama. My name is OPAKA.
Ah, your name is Opaka. Your job is Lama!
No, that's a Dali Lama with only one "L". My job is Kai, actually.
Only one L? Like the L train that brought us here?
Actually, that's an "El train," which is short for "Elevated Train". But we arrived here in a Runabout.
Ah. The Gingivitis.
No, that's tooth decay. The runabout's name is the Ganges. The Ganges is a Holy river.
Where the Bajorans go to pray and wash their clothes?
No, that's Hindis. On Bajor we worship Prophets.
Like the Ferengi.
No, that's "profits", as in gold-pressed latinum. Bajorans worship for enrichment of our pagh.
Pagh is richest when served live!
No, that's gagh - a Klingon delicacy.
Ah, gagh and shakaar lung.
No, bregit lung. Shakaar is actually First Minister of Bajor.
But he answers to you, Kai Ohniaka.
Oh, we've lapped ourselves. No, Ohniaka III is the planet Lore's Borg attacked. My name is Opaka. And to be thorough, this is is a preemptive "That's 'Lore's Borg', not 'Björn Borg'".
Ah, the same Borg who defeated his friend Minos in the 1976 World Championship Tennis Finals. The hands of fate.
Actually, that's Manos: The Hands of Fate, the Worst Movie Ever Made. And Minos is the planet from The Aresenal of Freedom. Björn Borg defeated Vitas Gerulaitis in four sets in 1976.
No, actually, he defeated Guillermo Vilas in four sets in 1976. Borg defeated Vitas Gerulaitis in five sets in 1977.
In the Stockholm Open, where he was upset by Jimmy Connors?
No, Connors upset him in the US Open. He was upset by John McEnroe at the Stockholm Open.
No, he upset McEnroe at the Stockholm Open.
No, Borg defeated Connors at the French Open and in the 1981 US Open. He didn't defeat McEnroe in the Stockholm Open until 1980.
Hm. Whatever happened to him?
He went mad and attacked the Enterprise.
Uhhnn, you really hate to hear that. Such a champion.
Well, at an early age....
Same old story, really.
So where were we, Mary Kay Cosmetics?
Sorry, that's Kai Opaka.....
Dukat: I'm telling you, Björn Borg was not upset by John McEnroe at Wimbledon in 1981.
Bajoran: But all the historical records indicate McEnroe upset Borg at Wimbledon in 1981!!!
Dukat: Well I'm sorry, but your historical records are wrong. Borg was not upset by McEnroe at that tournament.
Bajoran: I have here a sworn affadavit by the time-traveling Prophets of Bajor that McEnroe defeated Borg in 1981 at Wimbledon!!!
Dukat: Oh, McEnroe beat him. Borg was just not upset about it.
Kira: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
Jake: Not the Borg double-fisted backhand!!! AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH defeated, like Jimmy Connors at Wimbledon in 1981.
Kira: You know who else's star rose early? Annikan Skywalker. Just saying. It happens. But man I'd like to see Vader against Borg. You know, back in their heydays, not now. Not even 1982 Borg, when he lost to Yannick Noah in the Monte Carlo quarterfinals, shortly later announcing he was quitting the game and pulling a Yoda.
...
"Gone Degobah," dude.
Sisko: The Defiant stands alone!
Nog: Just like Björn Borg's 59 titles at the age of 25, and 49 consecutive matches won in any single season, and his 92.72% match winning percentage at Wimbledon spanning 1973 to 1981?
Sisko: Never tell me the odds!
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