The females, on the other hand, don't seem to have pon farr at all (not a single occurence - including during description of pon farr).
Actually, we had two occurrences, one of which was a red herring of sorts and one of which was highly relevant: in VOY "Blood Fever", B'Elanna Torres apparently thought she was a
male Vulcan in the throes of male pon farr and behaved accordingly, yet in ENT "Bounty", T'Pol specifically said she was getting the symptoms of female pon farr.
A couple of relevant bits from "Bounty":
T'Pol: "We call it the pon farr, the cycle of mating. [..] What caused it doesn't matter. If I don't mate with a male, Vulcan or otherwise, I'll die."
Phlox: "Your biochemical imbalance is growing worse. If we don't treat it now, the damage to your limbic system could be irreversible. You said it yourself, T'Pol, it could kill you."
Sounds like what Spock went through in "Amok Time", with refinements: we learn that the species is not as important as the act of mating (although again "act of mating" doesn't necessarily mean "act of copulating"), and we learn that blood chemistry is affected and that this is the likely mechanism of possible death in an unconsummated pon farr.
We don't learn about a seven-year cycle, but we do hear a "cycle" specifically mentioned.
In light of this, it would seem reasonable to postulate the following:
Vulcans, regardless of gender, cyclically get an urge to secure a sex partner (although the urge isn't necessarily left unsatisfied even if no sex immediately occurs with said partner), and get really, really excited about it, the result of which is a heightened chance of violence and related violent death, plus a messed-up body chemistry that also carries the risk of death. Sometimes, although very rarely in the modern days, the urge causes dueling that then almost invariably brings about death. Vulcans have ritualized this dueling, working in the idea of
inevitable death of at least one of the combatants - but our two examples of a pon farr fight between two males (or more exactly one mostly or fully Vulcan male and one substitute: "Amok Time", "Blood Fever") both confirm that there's nothing inevitable about such a death. The usual symptoms seem to be loss of emotional control and a degree of desperate lewdness.
The male and female may have their pon farrs at the same time, but odds are that they do not. Sex can occur and be enjoyed at any time, though, and normally the "cool" partner has no objection to copulating with the "hot" one. Synching the two with telepathic bonding does not necessarily synch their pon farr cycles, but it might be postulated to have an effect on both - either calming or exciting.
When a Vulcan feels he or she is in an established relationship where a mate is secured, pon farr does not occur, or at least does not manifest much. Vulcans lacking a secure mate will experience pon farr, which grows worse with age ("Gravity"). On males, the cycle is once every seven years; on females, cycle length is unknown.
I think the above is in accordance with the known facts, although of course just one possible way of putting them together.
Timo Saloniemi
