Cracked: 5 Movie Fan Theories That Make More Sense Than the Movie

[flemm]

Even though Snape had to give excuses for all his other line-walking, strangely, that one never came up. Again, I figured either Rowling completely forgot that plot point (and that's very possible), or she was dropping a hint to the readers as to whose side Snape was really on.

Well, I think it never came up because there was no way for Voldemort to know that Snape alerted the Order. The concern, from Snape's point of view (had he been a double agent), would have been Harry and Dumbledore discussing the issue. Really, this type of incident would be of great value to a double agent, as it would be a perfect opportunity to erase all doubts in the minds of the Order, and perhaps even in Harry's mind, while at the same time it was unlikely to cause any serious damage to Voldemort's cause.

Also, as I recall, Snape had nothing but contempt for Umbridge, so there is also that aspect to consider.

The Unbreakable Vow incident interests me in part because I think it actually strengthens the eventual reveal quite a bit, not because it makes it surprising, but because it increases the degree of difficulty, as does Snape killing Dumbledore. There has to be a satisfying explanation, and there is: Dumbledore wanted Snape to end his life. I don't like the seventh book of the series at all, but I think the Snape subplot actually works.

 

[Sindatur]

Yea, I was deep in the heart of Mugglenet at the time of release of HBP, and discussed it on several other boards as well, and those of us who weren't sold on Snape being a betrayer were amongst the minority and ridiculed for not seeing the "Obvious" in the Tower Scene. Only a small percentage didn't believe Snape was 100% on Dark Lord's side.

It was obvious, all right-- too obvious, as far as I was concerned. Now, that could just mean Rowling plots her stories with all the subtlety of a brick, but I was willing to believe something else was going on.

Regarding the end of OotP, Snape's priority as a double agent would be to retain Dumbledore's trust, so, having been warned by Harry, I could see him deciding that not passing the message along would be too great a risk (even if he were allied with Voldemort). While pretending to be a member of the Order, he would be required to walk that type of line on a regular basis.

True! But in this case it was completely swept under the rug and never mentioned by either side. Even though Snape had to give excuses for all his other line-walking, strangely, that one never came up. Again, I figured either Rowling completely forgot that plot point (and that's very possible), or she was dropping a hint to the readers as to whose side Snape was really on.

Why is it a bad thing you caught a clue many didn't? If there was no telegraphing with clues, everyone would've accused her of pulling it out of thin air (Or some place anatomically incorrect) because there was no way to figure it out.

That's a big problem with pleasing audiences today of anything, TV, Movies, Books, etc. If they leave clues and you figure it out, it's bad writing because it was too obvious, if they don't, it was poor writing because they didn't foreshadow. And Foreshadowing was a major part of her Story.

 

[flemm]

For a reveal like that, as you suggest, the author has to walk a fine line. The real test is not whether the actual outcome is surprising to everyone, but whether there is evidence that is open to interpretation until the last minute and whether the reveal at the end feels artifical and contrived.

The Snape subplot works, to my mind, because it fills both criteria: there is enough ambiguity to keep the reader guessing, at least on the details, but enough evidence that the outcome feels natural once it has occurred.

That second element is important and greatly lacking in other aspects of the series' conclusion: for example, we knew all along that Harry would defeat Voldemort, but that is not the problem. The problem, to my mind, is that the actual method of that victory is such a convoluted mess that it feels extremely contrived and anticlimactic.

 

[Silvercrest]

^This. All of it.

 

[Sindatur]

Why do you believe the ending was contrived?

1. The Cloak has always been portrayed as being not only special and rare because it was an Invisibility Cloak, but, the most special and rare of them all (or few?)

2. Dumbledore has always been portrayed as amongst the most special Wizards, and Wands have always been intimately connected with their Wizards. Therefore, likely that Dumbledore has a very special wand, especially considering he's a Dark Wizard Facist Destroyer himself.

3. The Ring didn't come along until Book 5, but Horcruxes and Deathly Hallows came after, so we weren't cheated on "something" being special about all the Hallows, before we learned of Hallows.

4. Love has always been portrayed as the Ultimate Power.

So, what was contrived and didn't have enough evidence pointing to it to make it feel right?

BTW, SilverCrest, sorry, I thought you were arguing against the Snape plotline resolution

 

[Gaith]

Well, the whole wand-allegiance stuff pretty much came out of nowhere, and then there's the related ludicrously labyrinthine process by which Rowling had Voldy off himself.

But, apart from that, I wouldn't call the finale too contrived - just dull.

The epilogue, OTOH... well, I've spoken my peace on that.

 

[Sindatur]

Well, the whole wand-allegiance stuff pretty much came out of nowhere,

Olivander told us in the first book/Movie that a wand chooses it's owner.

We've seen wizards struggle with a Wand that didn't choose them.

We saw the Twin Wands produce the scene at the end of GoF due to Harry's wand's allegiance to him, having chosen him

 

[flemm]

Well, I don't really care to rehash all of the minutiae, nor do I by any means contest your opinion that the ending works fine. However, other than Snape's tale, the ending just wasn't satisfying imo.

To summarize: too many macguffins. I liked the horcruxes well enough. I think the scene in the cavern at the end of book six really works. Some of this stuff is rather derivative of the LotR, but I can live with that. But then, in addition to horcruxes, suddenly there are hallows to drive the plot. And, as if that were not enough, suddenly there are new rules introduced regarding how wand ownership is passed to the victor of a duel.

Furthermore, Harry's blood being passed to Voldemort is also somehow important, though I honestly can't even recall at the moment why, exactly. It's overkill. To many magic objects driving the plot, with rules that are explained way too late in the story.

The proof of this is how much exposition there has to be at the very end of the novel, some of it during the fight with Voldemort, and some of it afterward, in the conversation with Dumbledore. And even then, I'm still not sure that it all actually adds up. Some of it feels unnecessary, especially the magic blood part. Moreover, a lot of it feels pretty meaningless. I mean, how does the "I beat you, so now I own your wand" rule develop anything on a thematic level (as these types of fantasy rules normally should, otherwise there is no reason to care about them)?

 

[Sindatur]

Well, I don't really care to rehash all of the minutiae, nor do I by any means contest your opinion that the ending works fine. However, other than Snape's tale, the ending just wasn't satisfying imo.

To summarize: too many macguffins. I liked the horcruxes well enough. I think the scene in the cavern at the end of book six really works. Some of this stuff is rather derivative of the LotR, but I can live with that. But then, in addition to horcruxes, suddenly there are hallows to drive the plot. And, as if that were not enough, suddenly there are new rules introduced regarding how wand ownership is passed to the victor of a duel.

Furthermore, Harry's blood being passed to Voldemort is also somehow important, though I honestly can't even recall at the moment why, exactly. It's overkill. To many magic objects driving the plot, with rules that are explained way too late in the story.

The proof of this is how much exposition there has to be at the very end of the novel, some of it during the fight with Voldemort, and some of it afterward, in the conversation with Dumbledore. And even then, I'm still not sure that it all actually adds up. Some of it feels unnecessary, especially the magic blood part. Moreover, a lot of it feels pretty meaningless. I mean, how does the "I beat you, so now I own your wand" rule develop anything on a thematic level (as these types of rules normally should, otherwise there is no reason to care about them).

Are you sure the book used the "Conquering the Wand" thing for any wand other then the Hallow? I believe that was a movie enhancement, but, I could be remembering wrong. Yea Harry took Draco's wand, but, I don't believe it worked well because he conquered it, I believe it was just satisfactory as any other stolen/borrowed/unchosen wand would.
Dumbledore was defeated and the wand passed to Draco, but, it chose Harry instead due to Draco's unworthiness.

 

[Gaith]

Well, the whole wand-allegiance stuff pretty much came out of nowhere,

Olivander told us in the first book/Movie that a wand chooses it's owner.

We've seen wizards struggle with a Wand that didn't choose them.

We saw the Twin Wands produce the scene at the end of GoF due to Harry's wand's allegiance to him, having chosen him

Eh, whether you like the wand weirdness or not, either way, you've got Voldy dying the wizarding equivalent of being killed by a ricochet of his own bullet. I wasn't clamoring for Harry to straight-up kill him, necessarily, but after seven increasingly large novels, was there really no better way for him to go out?

 

[Thestral]

Wellll.... he could've slipped in the shower I suppose.

 

[Gaith]

How about... Harry binds him in that paralysis hex, giving Snape (who miraculously is able to draw Gryffindor's sword) the chance to behead him; big green explosion then obliterates both.

... And that took me all of thirty seconds.

 

[Silvercrest]

Well, the whole wand-allegiance stuff pretty much came out of nowhere,

Olivander told us in the first book/Movie that a wand chooses it's owner.

We've seen wizards struggle with a Wand that didn't choose them.

We saw the Twin Wands produce the scene at the end of GoF due to Harry's wand's allegiance to him, having chosen him

Ah yes, the textbook example of rules coming out of nowhere. If twin wands duel each other, one will force the other to regurgitate all the spells it's recently cast, in reverse order... WHA??? My reaction was, "What the heck was Rowling smoking when she wrote that?"

Harry's reaction should have been, "Gee, Albus, it might have been nicer if you'd told me that a lot sooner. A crash course in wand lore would have come in real handy, considering you knew Voldy's wand and mine were twins. Thanks for nothing." As it is, it still reads as a piece of fluff written for the purpose of miraculously saving Harry's life, and only explained afterward.

As far as all these bits of arbitrary wand lore adding up so that the ending made perfect sense, all I can say is: If it makes that much sense to you, then you must have been able to predict the ending. Did you?

If all this stuff was so clear in advance, it shouldn't have required that much explanation after the fact.

I'm still siding with Gaith and flemm.

 

[Thestral]

How about... Harry binds him in that paralysis hex, giving Snape (who miraculously is able to draw Gryffindor's sword) the chance to behead him; big green explosion then obliterates both.

... And that took me all of thirty seconds.

Boring!

Here's a better idea: Harry summons an axe-wielding Abraham Lincoln and tells him Moldywort is a vampire.

 

[flemm]

Are you sure the book used the "Conquering the Wand" thing for any wand other then the Hallow? I believe that was a movie enhancement, but, I could be remembering wrong. Yea Harry took Draco's wand, but, I don't believe it worked well because he conquered it, I believe it was just satisfactory as any other stolen/borrowed/unchosen wand would.
Dumbledore was defeated and the wand passed to Draco, but, it chose Harry instead due to Draco's unworthiness.

I think the rule applies to other wands as well, at least this is strongly implied. From memory, this is what happens at the end:

Voldemort believes that the death wand or whatever won't work wonders for him because he is not the rightful owner, due to the fact that Snape bested Dumbledore. So, he believes that by killing Snape, he will become the wand's rightful owner.

In actual fact, Malfroy is the wand's rightful owner because, unbeknownst to Voldemort, it was he who disarmed Dumbledore, and thus ownership of the death wand passed to him. However, Harry later bested Malfroy, thus earning ownership of the wand. All of this is basically explained by Harry during the final duel.

The problem with all of that is twofold. By the end of the novel, the reader should really know enough about how the macguffins work to render such a last-minute explanation unnecessary. And, moreover, even once we do know, one of the keys to defeating Voldemort is basically an arbitrary set of coincidences.

 

[Gaith]

Hey, you know which Hogwarts house isn't totally rad? Hufflepuff:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0Z5_wipT2o

 

[flemm]

Hey, you know which Hogwarts house isn't totally rad? Hufflepuff:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0Z5_wipT2o

Don't get me started on the inanity of the "sorting" system

 

[DevilEyes]

#2. Battlestar Galactica's Cylons Are Robot Syphilis

Haven't watched BSG, so I'll skip this one.

OK, the BSG mythology didn't end up making, uh, perfect sense in the end... But this? This is utter nonsense.

 

[Thestral]

Hey, you know which Hogwarts house isn't totally rad? Hufflepuff:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0Z5_wipT2o

Don't get me started on the inanity of the "sorting" system

Go on...

Rowling didn't do much to make the Hufflepuffs stand out, that's for sure.

Granted, she didn't do much for the Ravenclaws either, but "I'm really smart" is a fair way to sum up what we know. Hufflepuffs often came off as Gryffindor-lite, if that.

 

[Gepard]

Rowling didn't do much to make the Hufflepuffs stand out, that's for sure.

To such a degree that it's got a trope named after it.