I love the Manhattan style, myself, but New England style is great too. I love both. 
Confessions: You do it and you know it is bad
- Thread starter TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME
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I used to love Legal Sea Foods' chowder but then Costco stopped selling it. 
And yes, that is as pathetic as it sounds.
And yes, that is as pathetic as it sounds.
Stop talking about chowder! We don't have chowder here, we don't even have clams!! Mussels are not the same. I miss clam chowder but ONLY the white one. The tomato one can go die.
"Sploogey".. thanks lurok. You may have in one post freed me from years of chowder nostalgia 
I have on many occasions allowed people to think I'm tech retarded so that I don't have to explain why I didn't accept their gmail chat request, facebook friend request etc..
"What? Oh I didn't see anything like that, where is it?"
"What? Oh I didn't see anything like that, where is it?"
Blasphemy! I prefer the Manhattan style. For starters, I prefer a tomato base to a cream/potato base. And while I like the NE style, I find it really rich and heavy.
I can we can all agree though that Rhode Island clam chowder can get bent.
I like NE clam chowder, but Manhattan is a waste of clams. If you want to use a tomato base, make vegetable soup or Maryland crab soup.
Oradell.
Oradell.
I have, on rare occasion, used my disabled child as an excuse to get out of social functions I seriously didn't want to attend. "Ooh, I'd love to, but it would be too overwhelming for my son" and all that. I feel guilty as hell doing it, because it cheapens his condition, but it also gives me a sense of evil pleasure. When he was younger and still non-verbal I could even get away with leaving boring functions early by claiming that I could see Son was close to a meltdown when he was, in fact, doing just fine. As his meltdowns at the time were, shall we say, quite epic, people were more than happy for me to leave with Son, even if he seemed content.
^I have totally used my disabled mother in the same way (she's autistic as well). I got three extensions on papers in college!
^How? In my cases I used true events but lied about when they happened in order to get extensions on college papers.
^Okay, your case is a bit different. But your post made it sound like you did it the same way Macloudt did to get out of sticky spots. The way I read her story, those who wasn't familiar with her son and/or his disability might get a wrong idea of what it is like to have that disability (worse than it really is). Most times, it probably won't do any harm though.
I know she said she did it rarely like yourself. Doing once is enough to reinforce misconceptions. I sometimes have to remind myself that playing the Deaf card may help reinforce misconceptions about the Deaf I sometimes complain about.
I know she said she did it rarely like yourself. Doing once is enough to reinforce misconceptions. I sometimes have to remind myself that playing the Deaf card may help reinforce misconceptions about the Deaf I sometimes complain about.
I understand what you're saying, Finn, which is why I hardly ever did it, and felt guilty afterwards. This happened just a few times when my son was much younger, and the majority of these functions involved people who knew my son, so they knew that, once he had a meltdown, there would be no calming him down for anywhere from half an hour to an hour (he was tiny for his age, but Christ almighty, that child could scream). Mostly these were people who pretty much didn't believe my son had a neurological condition and just thought I was a shitty-ass parent, which is why I didn't want to be around these people in the first place.
Did I mention these were mostly people I'm related to through marriage?
Did I mention these were mostly people I'm related to through marriage?
Yeah, I felt guilty using my mom that way too, and did it only a few times. I sometimes use diabetes to get out of things I don't want to do. I know it's not right, but I also feel like, diabetes sucks, autism can suck, maybe it's not so horrible that I've used these things to my own advantage a few times.
There were days where my son was okay but I was stressed as all hell, because he'd had a run of bad days. By that time my edit function was completely inoperable. Whatever popped into my head came out of my mouth, so it was best to stay away from people I didn't like much.
I don't think either of you should feel guilt for that. Sometimes you just reach your limit. The circumstances of your health and that of your family's; particularly as caregivers, sometimes just do not allow you to say "yes" to everything that is asked of you. When you are overextended and tired your own health can suffer and then who takes care of your family? Think of it as self-defense for your family.
Oh, yes. As we talked about in the caregivers' thread, it's very easy for caregivers to overextend themselves. I'll always be in the debt of three very good friends without whom I wouldn't have made it through my children's early years, especially where my younger son is concerned. My family all lived overseas, and as for my in-laws...grmph!
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