Cap Con 68: Travis & Jon Escape from Guantanamo Bay
- Thread starter Nerys Myk
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Travis: "ARCHER. KREE."
His eyes glow.
Archer: "So, judging by your outfits, and the little squiggly doo-dads, you're the head honcho of this disaster waiting to happen."
Travis: "I guess I'll have a turkey club."
Archer: "Alright, then. A turkey club and a meatball sub."
Deli Employee [Comm Channel]: "Sorry, we don't do turkey clubs."
Travis: "They don't do tur- but they're a deli!"
Archer: "Look, Travis, just order something else."
Archer: "Don't leave me hangin, bro, gimme ten!"
Naughty Travis...he always liked to watch.
GRAT: Do you mind telling me what you were doing inside Tandaran space without our permission?
ARCHER: Long story. It involved jazz hands and losing a bet.
We might be here a LONG while.
ARCHER: They want to know if you want the complimentary crazy bread or would prefer a fourth topping free of charge.
HEIL STOCKWELL!!!
That's funny.
The Captain didn't have a tattoo of a naked man on his back when we LEFT.
Alien who says "Ni!": You must cut down the tallest tree in space...with...a HERRING!
Archer: A herring? It cannot be done!
Archer: "I'm sorry, sir, but you must be this tall to ride the shuttlepod."
Archer: "And the women on that planet were all like seven or eight feet tall. I mean, their eyes were like way up here! And every time you turned around to face one of them, you just naturally found yourself staring at their chest! And - oh, my God! - did they ever take offense at that!"
...and so, to get Subcommander T'Pol and Crewman Cutler interested, I told them they had to be THIS tall to ride the "Amazing Jonathan."
GRAT: Ziggy says there's a 90.4% chance that this episode will be remembered as one of the better ones of the first season...
Mayweather learnt an important lesson that day; don't stick your head out of the turbo lift as the doors are closing!
Archer was in such a rush to get out that morning that he mixed up his deoderant with his hairspray
He watched enviously as the other actors practiced their lines...
Travis was determined to see if Santa was real or not.
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GRAT: WHEEEEEEW!!
Please, Captain...put your arm down.
Seriously.
SOMEONE HOSE THIS MAN DOWN!!
Anthony Montgomery was horrified when he discovered the rest of the cast watching Leprechaun in the Hood one night.
Archer: "Al, why haven't I leaped yet?!"
Grat: "Sorry, Sam, but Ziggy says you can't leap until you convince the Vulcans, Andorians, and Tellarites to join the Federation."
Archer: "But that could take years!"
(thinking to self) "The Captain pees like a girl?
WOW."
SAM: Al, why the hell haven't I LEAPED yet?
AL: Ziggy says there's a 94% chance you have to do the final episode first...and endure the shitstorm of fanbase anger that will result from it.
SAM: Ohhhhhh, boy...
SAM: Al, why the hell haven't I LEAPED yet?
AL: Ziggy says there's a 94% chance you have to do the final episode first...and endure the shitstorm of fanbase anger that will result from it.
Sam: "Oh no, not again."
...and so Jonathan Archer leaped from improbable plot to improbable plot...striving to make the most out of inane dialogue...
and hoping each time that his next leap...would be the leap to Earth.
Sam: "I think I could be much more effective on this mission if I were to leap into T'Pol's body instead of Archers."
Al: "Forget it! Ziggy says there is a 100 percent chance we don't have time for you to waste the next two days standing naked in front of a mirror."
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