How did Rey get off of Starkiller Base? All by herself, right? Oh, no, wait, she didn't! Rey needed Finn to be thinking of her, to get a ship there to get her out. That's not her getting "upstaged," either, by the way.
She freed her own self after unlocking another few force powers, and then beat the villain in a duel. You think she needed them to bring a ship which they already shown she could probably repair and fly better than them? Somehow this is supposed to be comparable to Luke getting an arm cut off and nearly dropped to his death? He also needed Obi Wan to take on Vader.
I don't even like/dislike either Rey or Luke that much. But there are some very real obvious differences between these characters it's a conversation killer when it inevitably turns into a mary sue debate about the criticisms being sexist