Al Calavicci is to blame for Captain Archer's incompetence

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Enterprise' started by WarpTenLizard, Sep 26, 2021.

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Which is the most hilarious thing to come out of Archer's mouth?

  1. "I'm doing the breast I can"

    5 vote(s)
    25.0%
  2. "A directive...that is prime"

    11 vote(s)
    55.0%
  3. "If anything happens to Porthos, I'll be the one watering their Alvera trees!"

    3 vote(s)
    15.0%
  4. Other (list below)

    1 vote(s)
    5.0%
  1. Alice_27

    Alice_27 Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    Future guy seems too tall to be Al. That could just be my perception though. Al could be disguising himself so Sam/Archer won't recognize him.
     
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  2. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    This needs to be official. This needs to be filmed. It's too good.
     
    Last edited: Oct 3, 2021
  3. Alice_27

    Alice_27 Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    Motion seconded! Ok, who's got the gift for writing this screenplay?
     
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  4. HopefulRomantic

    HopefulRomantic hyperpolypyroferricist Moderator

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    INT. ARCHER'S QUARTERS - NIGHT
    Sam Beckett, still in Archer's dress uniform, comes in, pulling at his collar. He looks tired. Porthos, waiting on the bed, jumps up to greet him. As Sam pets the dog, Al walks through the closed door into Archer's quarters. Porthos starts barking at Al, who makes a face, irritated.

    AL: Kids and dogs. We really have to fix that someday. Hasn't that mutt gotten used to me yet? It's been ten years.

    SAM: Must be your sparkling personality.

    He goes to his dresser. In the mirror's reflection, Jon Archer looks back at him.

    SAM: Why haven't I leaped, Al? I thought Ziggy said that Federation thing was what I was here to establish. That speech I just gave--

    Al pounds on the interface, as Ziggy squeaks back at him.

    AL: Ziggy's checking. (reads) Looks like it wasn't the Federation after all.

    SAM: You're telling me I've been here ten years and we still don't know what I'm here for? You're worse than that Daniels guy.

    Al punches buttons on the handlink.

    AL: C'mon, Ziggy...

    SAM: (thinks) Maybe I'm supposed to fix Shran's timeline. It makes no sense it all that a man as honorable and noble as Shran would become a jewel thief...

    AL: Wait, Ziggy is saying now... (reads)...it's Commander Tucker.

    SAM (sadly): But...how? Trip already committed suicide. I still don't understand it. He was the most resourceful guy on this ship. A real miracle worker. But when those Keystone Kops aliens got on the ship, why did he pull that bonehead move and blow himself up to stop them? Well, maybe it was because Malcolm was carousing with the MACOs in the mess hall and not guarding the ship at all, but still...

    AL: That's what Ziggy is saying. You're supposed to keep him from dying. He and T'Pol are going to have a hybrid baby that will help quell Earth's xenophobia and usher us into a new era of interspecies cooperation.

    SAM: Can we bring the E2 home too? I mean, Archer's great-granddaughter was on that ship.

    AL: Ziggy says, what the hell, let's give it a shot.

    SAM (rubs his hands together): When do we start? What do I do?

    AL: (reads his handlink) Bad news, Sam. Looks like you're going to have to contact Daniels again...

    SAM: Daniels? Aw, crap...

    AL: ... and go back in time six years. And keep Tucker and T'Pol from breaking up.

    SAM: (brightens) That'll be no problem. That breakup was the stupidest thing that ever happened to them. Worse than Koss!

    Porthos grabs the handlink away from Al and rushes off with it.

    AL: Not again! Can't you control your dog?!

    SAM: He's not MY dog. He's Archer's dog.

    AL: Details. (rushes after Porthos) C'mon, boy. How about some cheese?...

    SAM: Oh, boy...

    ;)
     
  5. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    awesome. but how did they make the handlink tangible to grab?

    You have the voices perfect, btw. Once again, I can hear it in the proper voices. Fantastic stuff, this thread.

    If it can't be filmed, it at least needs to be written.
     
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  6. Alice_27

    Alice_27 Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    Wonderful beginning to what can be a promising screenplay/fan-fic!

    If only there were a way to allow Porthos to actually grab that handlink it'd be great. :) Too bad holodecks were around in this time period. Then maybe Al could be tangible & Sam could interact with him a bit more.
     
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  7. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    Maybe with some secret tech confiscated from Daniel's quarters?
     
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  8. HopefulRomantic

    HopefulRomantic hyperpolypyroferricist Moderator

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    Haha, I forgot about the handlink being holographic too. The downside of writing at 1am. :ouch:

    But @Phoenix219, I love your idea of some Daniels tech making it possible. And @Alice_27, in the interim between Terra Prime and the Thing, maybe some sort of primitive experimental holodeck tech from interaction with other aliens has made it onto Enterprise--as glitchy as Al's holo-tech is at times, to keep everyone off balance. The idea of a running battle between Al and Porthos, with Al bribing the dog with cheese to get his handlink back... that would be a reason Sam doesn't save the day till the last minute at times, because Porthos has hidden the handlink and they can't talk to Ziggy. Fun stuff!

    Well done! This writing room is very creative. :techman: Somebody call Bellisario!
     
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  9. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    Random thoughts....

    So Daniels initial mission task was to save the NX, *because* it had Sam on it. Archer himself was never anything special, but Sam's mission to protect the forming of the Federation was a lynchpin to the entire future. Sam, due to his fish-out-of-water status, or Al's preoccupation, was going to miss the first major hurdle of his leap - maintaining the NX as a viable, functioning ship at the forefront. (Keep in mind, that Ziggy wouldn't know much about the future, until Al somehow gives Zig more data, presumably, again, from Daniel's quarters.) So the entire beginning of what we see concerning the TCW was all about keeping Sam alive, so that he could fulfill his mission.

    Not knowing exactly what kind of world or tech Daniels comes from, begs the question - does he have his OWN hologram to talk to? And could it even be old-old Al?
     
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  10. HopefulRomantic

    HopefulRomantic hyperpolypyroferricist Moderator

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    This "Enterprise Leap" crossover is looking so fun. Sam and Al are the perfect addition. :biggrin:
     
  11. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    This would probably make a perfect comic. Prose is good, but you need the visuals to accompany some of the original ENT series stuff that we are revisiting, and a younger age for Sam and Al. Comics are the only format that makes sense.
     
  12. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    So, as a gimmick..... if Ziggy got all his data from the future during the Temporal Cold War.... what if he/she never knows which timeline is coming true, so they never know which answer is the correct one? That could lead to some very indecisive moments by Archer, not to mention what appears to be a shifting personality based on the circumstance.


    Another random thought.... I wonder if a member of Kes' race would fall into the "under 5 years old" category, and see Sam/Al for who they actually are?
     
  13. HopefulRomantic

    HopefulRomantic hyperpolypyroferricist Moderator

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    Ha ha, I love all these cool little elements that solidify the premise of "Enterprise Leap" even more!

    Outstanding idea! Kids, dogs, beings who live short lifespans... Heyyyyy, that means Sim might see Sam and Al too!
     
  14. Phoenix219

    Phoenix219 Commodore Commodore

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    I somehow completely missed that episode - yeah, a "Sim" would probably count as well!
     
  15. Alice_27

    Alice_27 Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    So many awesome thoughts here! This all makes me wish I could write instead of just read about this idea :crazy: I'd LOVE to see this come to fruition.
     
  16. Sparky

    Sparky Commodore Commodore

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    RIP Dean Stockwell :(
     
  17. Alice_27

    Alice_27 Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    OMG! I had no idea Dean Stockwell just passed away :weep: Thank you Sparky for letting us know!
     
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  18. HopefulRomantic

    HopefulRomantic hyperpolypyroferricist Moderator

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    What an outstanding actor. From Compulsion to Married to the Mob (Oscar nomination) to Quantum Leap (Golden Globe win, 4 Emmy nominations).

    I remember when he won his Golden Globe for Quantum Leap. He spent part of his thank you speech praising Scott Bakula. Sweet, generous, talented.

    Time to pull out "Detained" and watch it again. As well as all of QL, he was fantastic as Al. And so many other roles.

    RIP. :weep:
     
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