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A Question About Girls

Not at my end, anyway. I'm not looking for an exclusive intimate relationship. I do, however, value their friendship.

Let me give you some good advice: The best way to totally ruin a friendship with a woman who is just your friend is to date her. Because that relationship will inevitably not work out, and you'll both find out that you were better off as just friends. But by then it will be too late.
 
Yeah, anyone I've been romantically involved with started out as a friend. And it never ended badly because we were friends.
 
That's not what we're talking about, right? You're talking about the non-sexual kind of friend, correct?
The non-sexual kind.

What the hell? Seriously, what the hell?
I don't know either.
Well, if two female friends who you are not sexually involved with are asking you to choose between them, then the best thing to do is advise them to get counseling. However, it seems that both are interested in you romantically and believe you reciprocate, so it would be best to proceed from that position.
 
^Except on those occasions where you end up married to each other for the next 40+ years.

I was referring to two people who are just friends and previously had no interest in forming a relationship with the other. I wasn't referring to two people who were friends who felt that getting together was inevitable from the start.
 
^Except on those occasions where you end up married to each other for the next 40+ years.

I was referring to two people who are just friends and previously had no interest in forming a relationship with the other. I wasn't referring to two people who were friends who felt that getting together was inevitable from the start.

And I'd say your advice is inaccurate in either case. Absolutely males and females who were previously platonic friends can have very meaningful relationships. In fact, I would argue it is one of the best ways to find a long term partner, because someone you intend to spend years with had better be your friend as well as your lover if you ever want it to work, and what better way to get to know someone than as platonic friends with none of the the 'game' of sexual relationships getting in the way? Almost all my friends who are in stable long term relationships started out this way - as did mine. In fact, I would offer the exact opposite advice. If you're looking for a girl you'll really like in a relationship, the first place I'd look is the girls you really like as friends.
 
Tell them both you're not interested in either of them that way and wish to remain friends with both of them.

Then tell them to grow the hell up.
 
^Except on those occasions where you end up married to each other for the next 40+ years.

I was referring to two people who are just friends and previously had no interest in forming a relationship with the other. I wasn't referring to two people who were friends who felt that getting together was inevitable from the start.

And I'd say your advice is inaccurate in either case. Absolutely males and females who were previously platonic friends can have very meaningful relationships. In fact, I would argue it is one of the best ways to find a long term partner, because someone you intend to spend years with had better be your friend as well as your lover if you ever want it to work, and what better way to get to know someone than as platonic friends with none of the the 'game' of sexual relationships getting in the way? Almost all my friends who are in stable long term relationships started out this way - as did mine. In fact, I would offer the exact opposite advice. If you're looking for a girl you'll really like in a relationship, the first place I'd look is the girls you really like as friends.

Amen. Before Missus SicOne, I had never dated a good friend. They were either dating material OR friendship material, but not both. But looking back on it now, I can see it was more the case of once I got to know them as friends, I didn't want to risk the friendship for the possibility of something more but the likelihood that it would fold up and I'd lose the friendship, but also the more I got to know them the more I discovered that they really weren't what I was looking for in a relationship. Plus, having good ladyfriends meant that they set you up with THEIR ladyfriends, and I got much more action than I would have if I had just pursued my ladyfriends in the first place.

I'm still not altogether clear on your situation...are these women "friends with benefits"? Have you slept with either (or both) of them? Because if you have, it's escalated substantially. If you've slept with one or the other or both and now they're demanding exclusivity, you're hosed; even if a woman knows she's a booty call, she nevertheless has a sense of ownership over you, even if you've said and/or demonstrated otherwise...it's just feminine nature. It's even worse with a FWB, as they know you care while a booty call can be persuaded that you don't care. It would take some serious diplomatic negotiating to even be able to be friends with one if you've picked the other, and even then your motives will always be suspect.

If you have NOT slept with either of them but they're demanding your friendship with each of them be exclusive of the other, then you have to consider if the friendship is worth it, though I'd have serious reservations about being friends with someone who felt they were unable to accept your friendship with someone they didn't care for. But you also have to take into consideration what each of their issues is with the other. If you're just platonic friends with both of them, with no "benefits" situation involved, is this something that the two ladies can work out with you as a moderator? At the very best they have a mere misunderstanding; at the very worst there's no common ground and then you have decisions to make.
 
Go ahead...but you had to tell them that it might not always be easy on them when they wanted you as a disclaimer And so if it didn''t work out, don't get upset. This way they knew what to expect and wouldn't get as upset because you had already warn them. And if they agreed, then best of luck!

This is kindda funny and strange topic! But in some cultures polygamy is not taboo!
 
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