The End of the World (**½)
Here's the thing: 2 stars seems a tiny bit too low (especially considering how low Rose was in my esteem, and that got 1.5), but 2.5 seems a little bit too high. I'm not going to start going to quarters, so we'll call this 2.5. Dead on average then. And I suppose that sounds about right.
So, we pick off immediately where Rose left off (that tacky slow motion shot of her grinning and running into the Tardis). And here comes the first gripe. In Rose, we never really saw the Tardis interior, but now we do. The Tardis interior looks ok I suppose, perhaps not my favourite (the TV Movie gothic is I think). But those controls? Good grief. As I said about Rose, however cheap classic Who was, as least it took itself seriously. This is just ridiculous.
Right, so this is the first thing we're going to see of a different place, a different time, and...
Well hang on, that looks like a recently built community center. Nice bit of wood panelling, but even playing a rip off of Pink Floyd's Cluster One won't convince me that this is what the year 5 billion will have for decor. This soon passes though, because then we get a look out of the window.
And the CGI looks great, here and throughout the whole episode. I'm not sure I've ever seen such good CGI in a British TV show, and almost certainly not before 2005. Money well spent. We then get a shot of the station, and again, this is meant to be the year 5 billion? This could easily pass for within 500 years.
So, the sun's going to expand and engulf the earth. I can't recall what they called the science of it here, but I don't think they were that technical. Rose says she saw about it on Newsroud Extra once, and said she thought it took hundreds of years, which either confirms that she really is an idiot, or that Newsround is really missing John Craven. Apparently the National Trust (not Planetary then) has been holding the sun back somehow, meaning they have technology that awesome, but still build space stations that look like scaffolding and cranes.
We now get introduced to the psychic paper. For when pointing the sonic screwdriver at someone's head and pressing on just won't do. After this, they bring on the aliens, while silly music plays. Nothing especially original in the designs here, but at least they're convincing. The tree woman gives the Doctor a clipping of her grandfather (which if she gives to everyone she meets, means he must have been about the size of the Great Deku Tree from Ocarina of Time). The Doctor repays her with the air from his lungs. And considering Christmas is coming up, I'm at least greatful for the cheap gift ideas. The Mox of Balhoon (I'm guessing with the spelling there) gives some spit. We can all guess the next logical gift, but I think that was all used on the script for Rose.
Then we meet the villain of the piece, Cassandra, the last human left. Though considering what she thinks of as an iPod and an ostrich, she may well be confusing human with trampoline. And if she's the last human, what are those guys with her meant to be? We later learn that she's the last "pure" human, so I suppose they could be "mongrel" humans who are still happy to work for what we're meant to believe is a racist.
What I did like is that Rose freaks out. That's believable, but not everyone would have though of writing that in. After all, at the end of the last episode, she decides to just go away with some weird bloke in an anachronistic old box who sounds like he hates humans. That she later addresses how hasty and unwise this may have been in dialogue is a nice addition. And I still say Piper is a great actress, even if she doesn't pronounce a single "t" in the entire series.
Also nice is the explanation of why everyone in Who seems to speak English. Yes, it relies on the idea of damn near impossible technology, but then, this isn't Star Trek.
And so the rest of the episode plays out. One thing that is completely stupid, and is of great detriment to the episode, is the propellers that block the walkway. What idiot would design that? A walkway you can't walk along, but - oh no! - the Doctor has to get to the end of to save everyone. Either design the propellers 3 metres higher, the platform 3 metres lower, or don't put the controls in an impossible place. Eeeeeesh. Was this the best way of manufacturing tensions and excitement that RTD could come up with? As well as a clichéd saving just in time. I sure hope he was saving his good ideas for a later story.
Ignoring that, and our second go with the impossible screwdriver (it computers around and opens a door, but only just in time, as per manufactured tension/excitement), what does work is the intrigue that builds up around the Doctor. Assuming this is in the same continuity as the classic shows (at the time, it looked like it could be either way), then poor old Galifrey's bitten the dust, due to some unnamed race. Hope we find out more.
One other thing though: when the Doctor reversed the teleportation feed to bring Cassandra back, should that have brought back her servant moisturisers too? But then, that wouldn't suit the ending RTD wanted.
So yeah, all in all, it was ok. Not great, not awful, but certainly a step up from Rose. 2.5 feels a little high, but it kept me entertained at least, and didn't have the awful attempts at humour that Rose had. This had something of the feel one would want from a new Doctor Who. Though I recall McCoy used to carry enough money to get by, whereas this guy doesn't. Maybe he thought he could just show psychic paper to chip shop workers, or use his sonic screwdriver to get a bite to eat. And have a look at the man selling the Big Issue at the end. He looks neither homeless, nor like he's even trying. Still, no gay reference this week (though we did get a sexual innuendo from the liana).
Couple of notable bits of dialogue:
"That's all very well and kind of obvious, but if you think about it..."
Don't say that Doctor, people will realise how bloody stupid that propeller thing is.
Hypocrite. Nah, I'm joking. Eccleston puts in a much better performance here than in Rose. Indeed, the Doctor even comes within driving distance of likeable.
"Flatness costs a fortune."
This episode all over, really.
Extraordinary screwdriver:
1. Stops plastic arm from receiving signal.
2. Disengages computerised lock on door.
I am very comfortable with my Nu if other people aren't then they are more than allowed to stay up at night to worry about it.
