I saw a deleted scene from a TNG episode with Picard and Wesley insulting each other in Wesley's quarters, I can't post it
Here's the script for it:
Wesley's brushing his hair in his quarters- Picard walks straight into the room
Picard: Ensign, what are you doing here? You were supposed to meet me in the shuttlebay 15 minutes ago
Wesley: Yeah I know, I'm sorry Captain but I was just a bit busy in here
Picard: busy? Doing what? Brushing your hair? Badly I might add. Strange isn't it Ensign? You're taking the helm of the flagship of the Federation but evidently you haven't even got the capacity to brush your hair
Wesley: well at least I've got hair to brush
Picard: For your information Ensign, I have got hair, it's just not on my head
Wesley: I don't want to know thank you
Picard: Hey let me tell you something, your head is the only place on your entire body where you've got hair and it'll stay like that for the rest of your natural life I guarantee it
Wesley: How the hell would you know my head is the only place where I've got hair?
Picard: so you're admitting it now then are you Ensign
Wesley: oh go get assimilated
Picard: what did you say?
Wesley: turn up your hearing aid old man
Picard: old man? You're calling me old?
Wesley: want the evidence? Take a look in the mirror, well I suppose you would if you weren't as blind as Geordi
Picard: Well I'm not surprised I'm as blind as Geordi, it's because I took a slight glance at you
Wesley: Just what is that supposed to mean?
Picard: you know what it means, no woman in her right mind could be attracted to you
Wesley: what about you? The closest you've ever gotten to a woman is when you've looked in the mirror
Picard: and the closest you'll ever get to a woman is your mother
Wesley: at least I'm not going to end up sleeping with a tin whistle for the rest of my life
Picard: listen, just because your birth certificate was an apology from the Starfleet condom factory, that's right Wesley, Beverly told me all about that
Wesley: Well at least when I was born, my parents knew I had a chance at having children of my own
Picard: DAMN YOU!
Picard hits Wesley, Wesley grabs onto Picard and the two throw each other to the floor and start rolling around fighting- Worf runs into the room and shoots them both on stun
Here's the script for it:
Wesley's brushing his hair in his quarters- Picard walks straight into the room
Picard: Ensign, what are you doing here? You were supposed to meet me in the shuttlebay 15 minutes ago
Wesley: Yeah I know, I'm sorry Captain but I was just a bit busy in here
Picard: busy? Doing what? Brushing your hair? Badly I might add. Strange isn't it Ensign? You're taking the helm of the flagship of the Federation but evidently you haven't even got the capacity to brush your hair
Wesley: well at least I've got hair to brush
Picard: For your information Ensign, I have got hair, it's just not on my head
Wesley: I don't want to know thank you
Picard: Hey let me tell you something, your head is the only place on your entire body where you've got hair and it'll stay like that for the rest of your natural life I guarantee it
Wesley: How the hell would you know my head is the only place where I've got hair?
Picard: so you're admitting it now then are you Ensign
Wesley: oh go get assimilated
Picard: what did you say?
Wesley: turn up your hearing aid old man
Picard: old man? You're calling me old?
Wesley: want the evidence? Take a look in the mirror, well I suppose you would if you weren't as blind as Geordi
Picard: Well I'm not surprised I'm as blind as Geordi, it's because I took a slight glance at you
Wesley: Just what is that supposed to mean?
Picard: you know what it means, no woman in her right mind could be attracted to you
Wesley: what about you? The closest you've ever gotten to a woman is when you've looked in the mirror
Picard: and the closest you'll ever get to a woman is your mother
Wesley: at least I'm not going to end up sleeping with a tin whistle for the rest of my life
Picard: listen, just because your birth certificate was an apology from the Starfleet condom factory, that's right Wesley, Beverly told me all about that
Wesley: Well at least when I was born, my parents knew I had a chance at having children of my own
Picard: DAMN YOU!
Picard hits Wesley, Wesley grabs onto Picard and the two throw each other to the floor and start rolling around fighting- Worf runs into the room and shoots them both on stun
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