Contest: ENTER DS9 CapCon 159: Seeing Red

Welcome to 2018, everyone, and another year of putting ridiuclous words in our favorite characters' mouths! Thank you to everyone who keeps playing week after week.

So, what were the last winners of 2017? Let's find out..

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Leviathan's "Worth It"

Natima: I came out of hiding, risked death at the hands of Dominion, travelled hundreds of light years...just to punish you for 'Profit and Lace'. NEVER. AGAIN.

Mr. Laser Beam's "Maxi-big, da Force"

Dukat: (laughs) No, seriously. Leia did WHAT in space?


JirinPanthosa's "One Usually Does."

Keiko quickly regretted agreeing to a Ferengi three way.

Nerys Myk's "Seventeen Separate Temporal Violations!"

KIRK: Excuse me, Captain. Here's tomorrow's duty roster for your approval.
SISKO: Lieutenant, er, Lieutenant?
KIRK: James Kirk, sir. I've been on temporary assignment here. Before I leave, I just want to say it's been an honor serving with you, sir.
SISKO: All right, Lieutenant. Carry on.
KIRK: Thank you, sir.

Bry_Sinclair's "That Guy...IN SPACE!"

Alien In Background: Hi mom!

Leadhead's "TGIF"

Kira: And now, by the blessed word of the Prophets, LET'S ALL GET DRUNK AND PLAY PING PONG!

And finally...

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Leviathan's "Genuine Spittake"

Kira: ...now we mix in Vodka, Peach Schnapps, and Odo...to make a 'Changeling on the Beach'


And now, the first pics for 2018!

 

Kira: Great, another hostage crisis. It's yesterday all over again.


Kira: And this is the button for when he tells you "Because I said so."

 

Garik: "Whoa! I thought only men had those....."

 

Garak: Not even in this universe, Major.



Kira: And this setting is “defabricate.” Garak loves that one.



“Let’s see if this episode lives up to its name.” *Fires phaser*



Kira: Not even I take me seriously with this hair.

EDIT - spelling/grammar

 

Kira: I heard you were afraid of tight spaces. Feeling claustrophobic yet?
Garak: Nope.


Kira: Light stun, Medium stun, Heavy stun, Kill, Fricasee, Crème Brûlée, Cigarette lighter - ah, here it is. Heavy crimp.
Ziyal: And Commander Worf comes in every Tuesday?
Kira: He'll Gowron-eyeball you if you mention his split ends.

 

GARAK: Major, I'm surprised!
KIRA: Ugh, it's true, I'm attracted to Cardassians, so I need to find one who isn't completely evil. Are you in or not?



KIRA: This is the Dukat sensor. I programmed it to automatically fire whenever it detects it's pointing at Dukat.
ZIYAL: Can you disable it?
KIRA: Umm...let's say I already did and go from there.



Kira just couldn't get into the holosuite programs Bareil designed for foreplay.



KIRA: Finn and Yaphet? Eww, I could never do anything like that.

 

Garak: "Are you the evil Kira, or the good Kira...?"

Kira: "I'm whatever you want me to be, Garak."

Garak: "Evil Kira."



Kira: "Yeah, let's take a look at these settings - um, 'immolate Bajorans', 'decapitate Bajorans', 'flay Bajorans', 'defenestrate Bajorans'. Huh. Maybe I should get you a different phaser."



Bareil: "-Ship, Part 2 is where Battlestar Galactica really started to go downhill. Don't even get me started about the Cylon Baby! And another thing-"



Bareil: "This isn't Resurrection, this is Profit and Lace."

 

Garak: I assure you, Major, I have no sexual interest in Ziyal. She's a mere child! What kind of monster do you take me for? The good doctor, on the other hand...


Kira: The writers want me to do WHAT with Dukat?!?

 

Thanks for the win & EC!



Setting 1: Vaporize
Setting 2: Dramatic slow-vaporize
Setting 3: Annoy
Setting 4: Defenestrate
Setting 5: Clownify
Setting 6: Make-it-look-like-an-accident
Setting 7: Stormtooper mode...but that just shuts off the aim.

 

Crazy Bareil: Wait...I can see the title...I'm dead aren't I? You're going to tragically kill me for continuity! I'll take your main characters with me dammit!

 

Ira Steven Behr: Let her go, Phil. That's a prop, not a real gun.
Philip Anglim: I don't care. I want back on the show! Even Nog has a great storyline.
Behr: Well, character death is really Ron Moore's thing. What do you think, Ron?
Moore: Bareil was a squirmy guy. I liked killing him off the first time. A second time could be fun too. Maybe it should be up to Nana.
Behr: Ok. Nana, do you think Kira should have a romance with Bareil, Shakar, or Odo?
Visitor: Gross!

 

KIRA: Here's the problem, you have the Wi-Fi turned off.

 

Kira: ...now be VERY careful. This gun is how we lost the last Ziyal.

 

Thanks for the win

Kira: You were alone with Dukat in a corridor, with a phaser, and you didn't shoot him!
Garak: I...I...
Kira: I'll give you one chance to right that, otherwise you'll see why no one wants to play Roladan Wild Draw with me.


Kira: It's got three settings: stun, kill and mega-death, try not to get them confused.
Ziyal: Mega-death?
Kira: You're not ready for mega-death.


Kira: (thinking) Ok, that's the phaser, that's his penis, but what is that third thing digging into my back?


Kira's reaction to an old human television show: Space Journey Discovery.

 

Bareil: What's this one about?
Kira: Resurrection.
Bareil: Who's Rea, and why does she have an erection
Kira: Please shoot me

 

Kira: "Cheese."
Bareil: "No, Nerys, you're supposed to smile for the camera when you say that."
Kira: "But I don't like cheese. You want me to smile, try "Quark's dead"."

 

Admit It...



You Saw "ERECTION" at First, Didn't You?

 

Kira:Only one of us gets to wear the pants in this relationship, and it ain't you, babe.

 

Mirror Kira: And then Worf said to Julian, "Wait a minute, I thought Trill spots weren't contagious!" And Julian said, "Those ain't Trill spots."

 

Kira: "Wanna see my chipmunk face?"