Movie Caption Contest #238: Tension

[LeadHead]

Good evening everyone! What's this? I'm starting a new contest within a month? Shocker!!!

First up to the plate, we have the "Groan" award, going to:

RIKER: Okay, okay, okay... One more. What happened to the klingon with arthritis? He had trouble with his Klingo-knees!!
WORF: Ugh...

Next, we have the "Those who do not learn from history..." Award, going to:

Geordi: If you hate this why are you still drinking it?
Data: Counselor Troi has always encouraged me to explore my emotions of hatred. That worked out so well in the Borg incident with Lore after all.

Next, we have the "It was already going downhill" Award, going to:

Revealed at last: William Shatner's negotiation tactics for directing Star Trek V.

No Kirk! The pool is on the other side!

Many thanks for everyone for participating and congratulations to our winners!

Now, a new contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: For crying out loud, it's the 23rd century, restart the dang government already!

Kirk: I know this will sound ironic, but you're fired.

Riker: Why do so many things vent ONTO THE BRIDGE?!

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Trill: It's a hundred light years to the Federation. We have a full storage of dilithium, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark...and we're wearing Starfleet uniforms.

Riker: Hit it.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Tellarite Ambassador on right: "Will you shift your stinking turtlehead out the way of the screen!?"
Kamarag: "Of course you realise this means war..."

Spock: "If you are logical, you will shoot."
Kirk: "I'd much rather you didn't. He still owes me 50 credits from our last poker game."

Riker: "Isn't this... trilling? You know, if you want I could give you a... trill... I've always been a ... trill... seeker, you see. I could show you the patented Will Riker... Triller..."

Trill: "That's enough."

Riker: "Right..."

 

[bbjeg]

Trill: Why did they call you baby face again?

 

[R. Star]

Thanks for the win!

Kirk: You are now being assaulted by a deadly whale probe which will destroy your planet. I have the only two whales that can stop it. You will unconditionally surrender or I won't release them. All your base are belong to us.

Valeris: This isn't what it seems... I can explain.
Kirk: A Night in Sickbay with you and all will be forgiven.
Spock: This is most illogical.
Kirk: Have you looked at her man, it would be illogical -not- to tap that!

Trill: So Counselor Troi has a nick name for you I hear...
Riker: Yes, babyface... it's an endearment.
Trill: Actually not that... she was talking about something lower... though the word baby was used.

 

[Triskelion]

Are you a Trill?
Isn't it obvious by my spots?
Tell that to my space herpes.

 

[Finn]

So... You and Beverly?

 

[inflatabledalek]

Thankf FTW EVIL Lincoln! (Oh, and for the TNG one as well as I think I forgot to do it there...)

Kirk: ...And I will not be leaving the Ecuadorian embassy until I am guaranteed immunity from prosecution.

Valeris: Oh no Captain, I've heard all about you. Get out of my bed and out of my quarters or the Vulcan gets it.

Kirk: There you go, she resisted my charms, must be a traitor.

Riker: So, you're not a joined Trill?

Trill: No.

Riker: So you don't have a little slug right up inside you wriggling about?

Trill: Err, no.

Riker: Would you like one?

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Riker: "Hi, there! I understand you Trill women have a soft spot for sensitive men. What if I told you I wet my pants when that last torpedo hit?"

 

[CaptainBearclaw]

William Shatner's acting style does not please 23rd century talent scouts.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Kirk: "-and it just wasn't the same after Peter Gabriel left."

Kamarag: "YOU FOOL! I meant his other Genesis vlog!"

Kirk: "Come on, don't be a pussy. Pull your balls out of your purse and shoot the green-blooded son of a bitch."

Spock: "Fascinating."

Trill: "I wouldn't worry about it, the Enterprise is rated to withstand a Borg attack."

Riker: "Thank goodness. For how long?"

Trill: "Anywhere between 1 and 0 seconds, give or take."

 

[Starpaul20]

Riker: This might not be the best time, but how far do the spots go down?

 

[Nerys Myk]

KAMARAG: Shatner? I thought we were going to watch one of the Abrams' film!!!!

 

[Triskelion]

Before we start, let's all congratulate Scruffy the zamboni driver for thirty years of service. Godspeed, Scruffy!

While you've got him at gunpoint, ask him if he really boinked Rand in the turboshaft. And if he was speaking literally or figuratively.

 

[shivkala]

Kirk: "-and it just wasn't the same after Peter Gabriel left."

Kamarag: "YOU FOOL! I meant his other Genesis vlog!"

^
This one has my vote for best caption!

Ambassador: 23rd Century and we're still using Powerpoint? And, oh, no, he's embedded a video. C'mon, where's the holographic projector?

Kirk: Bad time to ask for a threesome, huh? Well, it was worth a shot...

Trill: Sir, we're not going to last much longer.

Riker: Damn it, that's twice in a row Picard has left me in charge and I've gotten the ship blown to pieces. You know what the worst part of it will be...the speeches I'll have to sit through..."You know, Number One, being a starship captain is a heavy responsibility..." Kill me now!

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Weird, all this time I thought you were Saavik.

TRILL: You were great in The Motion Picture.

RIKER: That was Decker!!!!! I knew shaving was a mistake.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Trill: ...I'm pregnant.

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Kirk: Bad time to ask for a threesome, huh? Well, it was worth a shot...

Spock: "Technically sir two males and 1 Female is a gang bang"

Kirk: "Oh Shut up Spock!"

 

[inflatabledalek]

Kirk: Bad time to ask for a threesome, huh? Well, it was worth a shot...

Spock: "Technically sir two males and 1 Female is a gang bang"

Kirk: "Oh Shut up Spock!"

Valeris: I prefer the term "Spit Roast" myself.