TNG Caption This! 321: Can't Stop Partying

[Triskelion]

Picard: What is this, a Starbucks? Get all these douchebags off the bridge.

Worf: Don't you think you all are standing a little too far to catch me?
Picard: Oh turn around, Worf. This is a trust exercise.

Picard: Prepare a shipment of Victorian collars, floor-length skirts and granny boots for the Edo, Data.

Edo God: OH NO HE DI'IN'T!

Geesh, Data and his Spot Instagrams.

Remmik: The strippers are stuck in security, Admiral. The metal detectors keep going off in sensitive areas.

Vulcan Admiral: Well it is Starfleet Command - the whole place is a sensitive area!

 

[Nerys Myk]

WES: "R"? Kirk's middle initial is "T"!

PICARD: Effing nerds.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Picard: I'm practicing on this computer generated image but I can't seem to learn how to buff my own head.

Remmick: Admiral, I wish I knew how to quit you.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Mr. Crusher, would you kindly stop staring at Lieutenant Yar's shadow's crotch!"

Remmick: "Your wife called. She wants you to pick up a loaf of bread on your way home, since you will be passing close to a food store on the way."
Savar: "She is most logical."

 

[Dale Sams]

Picard: "No Lieutenant, I really don't care what you would do for a Klondike Bar."

Worst game. Of Red Rover. Ever.

"Look, I know you three are very..."excited"...about conquering the Federation, but FOR GOD'S SAKE,... put your pants back on!"

 

[Triskelion]

Picard: How do they expect to merchandise an alien space station that is only partly in this dimension?

Data: Production design really dropped the ball on this one, sir.

Remmik: If you gentlemen would care to don your space leotards the Silver Sneakers workout group is starting.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Alien Space Station: Turn back! You're on a collision course!
Picard: Merde. Deanna's at the helm again, isn't she?

 

[inflatabledalek]

Thnks for the belly laugh LH!

Picard: Can't you wait till we're out of the turbolift next time?

Picard: Merde... what's wrong with the sky?

Data: It is green.

Picard: I wish you'd stop saying that.

Picard: Am I boring you Commander?

Data: In truth Sir... Yes.

Captain's Log Stardate 4123.45: There are two things I hate. The Borg,and filling in my tax return forms.

Remmick: You really need to work on your Vulcan neck pinch, all it did to Riker was make him pull his sex face.

 

[Mario de Monti]

@ inflatabledalek

Good ones

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Remmick: "Ambassador Sarek is waiting to speak with you in your office. Apparently, he has taken offense at your 'earth women are easy' comment."

 

[Cmdr.Druss]

Thanks for the win.

Picard: "You're right Mr Worf, people do take notice of this aftershave. What's it called?"
Worf: "Klingon Sex Panther"

Director: "Action... ACTION... Some one move damn it!"

Picard: "Captain's log, Stardate 4481, wait...Stardate 4471.3, no that's not right either...if today's Tuesday....Damn stardates!"

Remmick: "You must... No you're an Admiral now, you have to go crazy with power...Did you even read the job description?!"

 

[Mario de Monti]

@ Cmdr.Druss

I love Picard´s Stardate trouble

 

[Finn]

Picard: (thinking) Lwaxana, if you are still up there, please tell your daughter to beam us up save Wesley...

 

[Honorable Ensign]

Picard: Line dancing requires a line, people! Come on, let's get organized here!

Picard: I need to stop playing Words with Friends with Q.

 

[Holdfast]

Captain's Log Stardate 4123.45: There are two things I hate. The Borg,and filling in my tax return forms.

Captain's Log. Supplemental: Investigations have confirmed my worst fears; the Borg inflitrated and assimilated the Federation Revenue Service decades ago. Until now, no one noticed the difference.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Impressive Mr. Worf, but not the best use of time on an Away Team.

 

[T'Girl]

Captain's Log Stardate 4123.45: There are two things I hate. The Borg,and filling in my tax return forms.

Captain's Log. Supplemental: Investigations have confirmed my worst fears; the Borg inflitrated and assimilated the Federation Revenue Service decades ago. Until now, no one noticed the difference.

(Monitor)

FROM: The Federation Internal Revenue Service.

TO: Jean Luc Picard, Captain.

Dear Sir,

It has come to our attention (never mind how) that you voted against the current President in the resent Federation wide Presidential election.

Your tax returns are therefor being subjected to audit for the previous four (Earth) decades. Please make yourself and your records availible at the Tusken VII office of Mr/Ms Xyhskd on stardate 45839.73.

Have a nice day.

 

[Triskelion]

Picard: - and then the Stargazer crew all laughed and they all loved me and didn't find me stuffy at all. And all the women wanted my autograph.

Riker: Sure, on their transfer papers.

Picard: I gave you a direct order, Mister Worf!
Worf: Klingons do not hokey-pokey!

Admiral: Sorry Jean-Luc, eliminating female razors does not "improve ship's efficiency."

Remmik: Sir, The Muppet Show called. They need Statler and Waldorf back.

 

[T'Girl]

Wesley: "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ..."

Wesley: "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ..."

Tasha: "You know, if Wesley would just masturbate less ..."

 

[Captain Clark Terrell]

Tasha: "You know, if Wesley would just masturbate less ..."

Well, he certainly can't be doing it more often than you.

--Sran