Brannon Braga: Not a Diane Carey Fan?

[Christopher]

^True, there were arguments over what should count, but then it was understood to be a matter of fan opinion and belief. What Roddenberry and Arnold created was the mentality that what counts and what doesn't is defined by the studio and that their judgments are imposed by the fans -- that the fans are supposed to be submissive to what the studio tells them to believe rather than making their own choices about what to believe. You still see fans today who labor under the delusion that there's some CBS or Paramount employee whose sole function is to declare what bits of Trek they're allowed to like -- who believe that they have to subjugate themselves to someone else's authority. They treat fandom like it's a job where they have to follow orders rather than a form of recreation where they can use their own imaginations. And that's because they falsely believe that the Arnoldian approach to canon, which was only in effect for like 3 years and ended 22 years ago, is still binding to this day.

 

[F. King Daniel]

"Arnoldian" sounds like a particularly dictatorial race of Trek aliens

 

[Greg Cox]

. You still see fans today who labor under the delusion that there's some CBS or Paramount employee whose sole function is to declare what bits of Trek they're allowed to like -- .

Wait, you're telling me that submissions don't have to be stamped in triplicate by the Executive Committee on Canon? After I filed all that paperwork to have my books declared Semi-Canon, Status B? What about my Canon Application fees? Can I get a refund from the Department of Expanded Continuity, New York Branch?

 

[Nerys Myk]

This is very true. Don't forget that one of the most famous comic stories of all time, Crisis on Infinite Earths, is all about establishing which stories count and which don't.

I thought it was about wiping the slate clean. It was only afterward that folks began to wonder and worry about which ones counted. So a never ending cycle of continuity fixes began.

Wait, you're telling me that submissions don't have to be stamped in triplicate by the Executive Committee on Canon? After I filed all that paperwork to have my books declared Semi-Canon, Status B? What about my Canon Application fees? Can I get a refund from the Department of Expanded Continuity, New York Branch?

You fool! Never ask for Status B!!!!

 

[Greg Cox]

Wait, you're telling me that submissions don't have to be stamped in triplicate by the Executive Committee on Canon? After I filed all that paperwork to have my books declared Semi-Canon, Status B? What about my Canon Application fees? Can I get a refund from the Department of Expanded Continuity, New York Branch?

You fool! Never ask for Status B!!!!

Yeah, I was pushing my luck there . . . .

 

[SicOne]

^ That's OK. The Department of Expanded Continuity's versions of Dulmer and Lucsly will be around to chat with you about your upgrade to Status A. After the requisite fees and honorariums are met, of course.

 

[Avro Arrow]

What about my Canon Application fees? Can I get a refund from the Department of Expanded Continuity, New York Branch?

Your payments were non-canon, therefore do not count and obviously then cannot be refunded.

Sorry.

 

[Therin of Andor]

Is Paula Block still with CBS Consumer Products? I think I remember reading something about her no longer being involved with the Trek tie-ins.

Paula left several years ago, but has written, with husband Terry Erdmann, the "Star Trek 101", "TOS 365" and "TNG 365" books since then. John Van Citters is the main ST person at CBS Consumer Products these days.

 

[Stevil2001]

Dug out my copy of Broken Bow.

"Three days. That's all I need."
Okay, everybody always said "Three days," so Archer had picked it out of a hat, hoping they'd think it had a good ring.

Forrest waited until they were gone, then winked at Leonard and spoke to Archer. "I had a feeling their approach wouldn't sit too well with you, John. Don't screw this up."
Archer restrained his comment. The last part must be meant as a joke, because nobody would say it to a captain and be serious.

Archer managed not to groan at her [Hoshi's] flimsy excuse. "You've got to have someone who can cover for you." He avoided commenting that it was just a foreign language class and she might have to rearrange her priorities to a more galactic mentality. No, probably not the thing to say right now.

"Intriguing," Phlox said. Already the word was trite. Aliens always said intriguing when they didn't know what else to say. [...] "I especially liked the Chinese food. Have you ever tried it?"
[...]Archer shrugged. "I've lived in San Francisco all my life."
Of course, San Francisco had a Chinese restaurant on every third corner, just like any other American city, but he sensed Phlox wanted to have something on him.

In that case, I think Carey is misreading the script. I interpreted that line as meaning "Of course I have" but she seems to be rationalizing Archer saying he hasn't.

"You know that firsthand?"
"Firsthand, secondhand, and thirdhand."
Uh-huh, sailor stories already. Tucker offered a shrug and made no further comment about their slipping back into a pointlessly prepubescent moment.

"Vulcans don't touch food with their hands."
Where had she made up that one? Archer had seen, with his own eyes, Ambassador Soval eating finger food at a reception.

At this special moment in their relationship, T'Pol succeeded in snapping the breadstick with a rather tidy final cut. She slid the piece onto her fork. "With proper discipline, anything's possible."
She then ate the piece, as if that were really something worth showing off.
Archer managed not to groan.

 

[Atticus]

Those are hilarious

 

[F. King Daniel]

Ouch!

 

[Thrawn]

That's fantastic.

 

[bullethead]

The ones with T'Pol are good, because they actually add some insight, but the rest are totally something I'd sack the writer for if I were the one paying him/her to do a novelization.

 

[iarann]

To add to Steve Mollmann's extensive list, here is the one I remember, Kindle version so I'm not sure of the page number:

“How can you be so damned sure what our sensors can do?”

“Vulcan children play with toys that are more sophisticated.”

Tucker stopped what he was doing and took a moment to reflect on this, which was just a plain fake-out. She knew better, and worse- she knew he knew better. Either she was playing, or enjoying another insult.

 

[Turtletrekker]

Wow. What did she say about the Butterfly dancers with the tongues (as that was the example the that Braga brought up)?

I dug out my novelizations for Trials and Tribble-ations, The Way of the Warrior, the Dominion War arc and Flashback. I'll thumb through them and try and see if I can find similar examples in these other novelizations.

 

[iarann]

Wow. What did she say about the Butterfly dancers with the tongues (as that was the example the that Braga brought up)?

Here it is, pay particular close attention to the last paragraph:

As he and Mayweather watched, rapt by the sight, the women squirmed closer to the lantern. One of them tipped back her head and emitted an eight-inch tongue that snared one of the butterflies.

An instant later, the second woman did the same. Were they competing?

Only now did Reed and Mayweather realize they had been joined by a gathering of other spectators to watch the butterfly dance. The crowd seemed to run the course from arousal to disgust. Rather familiar, at the moment, Reed noted.

Ah, yes, a brothel. What a shock. If he had been sketching out the most stereotypical mecca in all literature, this would be at its center. Didn’t anyone do anything subtle anymore?

 

[Stevil2001]

Yeah, that one is great. I also like what she caps the scene with a couple pages later:

Reed stifled a groan and avoided mentioning that he couldn't believe it either, and he didn't want to tell this story. Perhaps he could make something up that would be more interesting to hear about and less trite in the telling.

A few more, while I have the book out:

"Rigel," she finally began, "is a planetary system approximately fifteen light-years from our present position."
Tucker watched and held his breath. Of course, Earth had known about the blue giant Rigel for generations, and other stars like Altair and Arcturus, but this was the first he'd heard of settled planets there.

"It's all right," she [Hoshi] said. "Rigelian uses a pronomial base. The translator's just reprocessing the syntax."
Who cared? Archer avoided telling her nobody was interested in how it did what it was doing [...]

Carey usually seems to bring out Archer's inner jerk with her monologue.

Oh, brother. This dame [Sarin, the good Suliban woman] had seen too many steamy movies. She had the sticky dialogue down pat, not to mention the unoriginal seductive stare and liquid lips. What did they take him for?

There are some good touches: small errors make the rush launch of the NX-01 a little rougher than it needs to be, which makes Archer and Trip paranoid about internal sabotage, shaping their attitude toward T'Pol. And later, they theorize that Forrest and Soval collaborated in placing T'Pol on the NX-01 as an experiment in seeing how a Vulcan would work with humans over a protracted period of time.

 

[JD]

Wow, I can't believe those were actually in the published book. I could see some of them being snuck through in a more subtle form, but there is no subtlety there at all.

 

[Enterprise is Great]

I had forgotten all of that. I remember reading it and was shocked at the snarkiness of it. It kind of annoyed me as Broken Bow is my favorite of the modern Trek pilots. At least it wasn't as annoying as Red Sector though...that book was complete trash.

 

[ToddCam]

Gotta say, that breadstick one was pretty awesome. Everything else was asinine, but got to give her credit for that one. I thought something along the same lines when I saw that scene.