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Movie Caption Contest #225: Unpredictable Scenarios

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LeadHead

Director of Comedy
Premium Member
Hello everyone! Lets go!


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First up to the plate, we have the "Location Scout" Award, going to:

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PICARD: I found it! The setting for countless Star Trek Episodes!!!

Next, we have the "Make sure you say Yes" Award, going to:

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Picard: "It's that blasted Q again, isn't it?"
Ensign: "What should I do, sir?"
Riker: "Ask him if he's a god, Ensign Gozer."


Next, we have the "Something in common" Award, going to:

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Geordi: Aaaakk my eyes!!
Cochrane: What's with him?
Geordi: "Kardashian sex tape"
Riker & Cochrane:*thinking* Poor bastard.

The "Reading Rainbow" Award, goes to:

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GEORDI: Look everyone! A butterfly in the sky!
TROI: I can go twice as high.
GEORDI: Take a look!
COCHRANE: (confused)
RIKER: Relax Doc. It's in a book.


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Commander Tomalak:
"Further more, I demand that- what the hell are you doing?!"

Riker: "Larping."

Worf: "I cast fireball at the Romulan Warbird. It deals 10d6 damage."

Congratulations to our winners and thanks to everyone who participated!

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Enjoy!
 
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Decker: Captain, we've watched the instant replay 5 times now. Do you agree that the field goal was no good?

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Kirk: Tell the shuttle cleanup crew that I'm sorry for the mess.

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Picard: I was afraid of this. They lost our reservation. Set phasers to maximum.
 
Thanks for the win!

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McCoy: "Can we look at you yet..."
Decker: "... um... not quite yet."
Kirk: "Damn, you saw Ilia two hours ago, that erection still hasn't gone down?"

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Kirk hands yeoman a twenty: "There's another twenty in it for you if you don't park it under a lime tree this time."

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Picard: "Aw crap, the Stinking Gorn has gone al fresco. There's no respect for tradition anymore."
 
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Decker: So, as you can see from this chart, we can save 15% of our money on spaceship ensurance if we switch to GEICO.
Spock: Facinating
Kirk: Hm, interesting
Bones: Damn...
 
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Beverly: Looks like they bought the furniture at a Home Depot, the decorations at a Pier One and the clothes from a Kohls.
 
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Spock: "Commander, please cease bending over that railing and stand up straight! This captioning crowd is exceptionally prone to fart jokes!"


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Kirk: "Well, that was the most wasted trip to Wrigley's Pleasure Planet ever! I didn't even know there was such a thing as the United Hookers Union. Much less that they'd be on strike!"


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Picard: "Ah, al fresco dining! A delight on just about any planet in the galaxy!"
Troi: "Except for Vega 4, with their near-constant meteorite bombardments."
Picard: "Well...yeah..."
 
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Kirk: I feel sorry for Leadhead, it must be hard to come up with a caption from this film that doesn't involve us just staring in a slightly constipated way at the viewscreen.


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Kirk: You might want to leave it a few minutes before going in there son. Beans and bourbon really were a lethal combination.


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Picard: What's on the menu?

Ba'Ku: Sanctimonious bullshit.
 
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Robert Wise: Okay, folks, I just need another 15 minutes of you staring at the screen so we can add the fx in post and we'll be all set for the day.

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Yeoman: Sir, while you were gone, you received an important message.
Kirk: Yes, Yeoman, from Starfleet, I know.
Yeoman: No, sir, another important message.
Kirk: Well, let's hear it, who's it from.
Yeoman: The 20th Century, sir, they'd like their clothing back.

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It was only later, after Picard remembered that the Bak'u seated the Son'a at the children's table, that he realized he probably should have picked up on the whole "The Son'a are the children of the Bak'u" thing a little earlier.
 
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KIRK: You wanna stop trying to hump the railing, Decker. Its a new ship.

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KIRK: I don't wanna see a single scratch and I've memorized the mileage. We clear?

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PICARD: The patio? At these prices I expect a freaking roof!!!!
 
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Spock: Atomic readings are off the scale, Captain. We are entering the Wedgula now.
McCoy: I wonder why they call it that?
Decker: Gaaaah!
Kirk: Wedgula, Bones. The Great Wedgie Nebula.


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Kirk: Sorry about the carbonic anhydride, Crewman. Go see the Quartermaster for a new set of bionic feet.


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Picard:
Immigration! Ha, just kidding. Entire kitchen staff safe for another day.
 
Thanks for the win. And properly blended, too! I'll be a barista yet.

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[Everyone starts leaning expectantly to the left]

Decker: "The left... you gotta move a little to the left..."

Sulu: "Would you sit your ass down!? You wanna drive this thing?!"

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Kirk:
"What's with all the smoke and neon lights?"

Spock:
"It appears we've walked onto a music video from the 80s, captain."

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Picard: "Well shit. Is there any place I can go for lunch on a Sunday that isn't packed like a Pakled freight train?"
 
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Spock: We are entering the anomaly now.
Decker: You know that hole looks a lot like a...
Kirk: The Final Frontier? Hah... I've been here many times. What do you think Bones?
McCoy: Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not a gynaco-- wait.

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Travis Mayweather- 100 years later and still doomed to being an extra in the background.

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Picard: I am Jean-Luc Picard, captain of the Enterprise. We come in peace. Now, I demand one of your villages finest MILF's as tribute, for protection from the Son'a.
 
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Decker: Hey, are you guys watching "Halloween"?
Spock: The Admiral has never seen it before.
Kirk: The mask that guy is wearing seems strangely familiar...
 
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Decker: See? Belts! All throughout history! I told you buckles had a purpose!

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Kirk: "I always take up two spots. Keeps it from getting scratched."
Crewman: Douche.

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Picard: Is this the Orgynarium?
Troi: It is never the orgynarium, Captain. The Orgynarium was a hypnogogic side effect of your scalp treatment.
Picard: <Points to duckblind> Is that the Orgynarium?
 
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Kirk: Decker, Why are you leaning like that?

Decker: Um... no reason. Yeah...um.. It's comfortable standing like this....*mutters* not looking at Ilia anymore
 
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Decker: Errr... Captain... I've been meaning to ask you, was it really necessary for us both to take demotions for you to assume command? Couldn't you have stayed an Admiral and me a Captain as your XO?

Kirk: Sorry Decker, it's the rules.

Decker: But the time it took me to to get a new uniform made (I see you had one ready) could have been used much better...

Kirk: I didn't write the rule book Decker!

Spock: Actually you did write that part of it Captain, just updated over the Spacenet this morning, Regulation 9875 sub section 45: The How I Get To Become A Captain Again By Sneakily Teaming Up With A Space Cloud To Get Rid of That Tit Decker clause.

Kirk: Circumstantial!
 
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Decker: So have we learnt anything from the training video?

Kirk: Asking hot female officers if they have a vow of celibacy counts as sexual harassment now?!
 
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