doubleohfive
Fleet Admiral
Well, could this be a viable solution to solve your problems with your weight. Maybe?
(sorry, couldn't resist the play on words here)
I think I need a transfer...
- Thread starter Trekker4747
- Start date
Well, could this be a viable solution to solve your problems with your weight. Maybe?
(sorry, couldn't resist the play on words here)
All it takes is a single step. I don't exude confidence, and I have a fairly low self esteem, and I'm an overweight guy. I don't have anyone either, and I would often mope around. But recently I started making changes.
It all started when I had a tightening in my chest and realized I needed to do something. I ended up signing up with a gym. I now have 3 sessions a week, and people recognize me, smile at me, and know me by name. It has become a new lifestyle for me. In doing so, I've not only lost weight, but I've gained new confidence and a new outlook on life. People around me comment to me how much I've changed, how much more positive I am. I also feel better about myself knowing that I'm doing something, and I also feel more healthy. So, all it takes is that one step.
In High School, I went to a summer camp. I ended up having a crush on this one girl. We ended up sharing a canoe together. There was this powerful attraction going on, to the point that she must have felt it too, because at the end of camp, when we were sitting in the cafeteria, she had a friend send me a note with her phone number. Back then, I was highly skeptical, having had lots of pranks and bullying done on me, and I didn't know what to think of it. Also, at the time, I had no idea who the girl actually was. I didn't know her name. But I searched the phone book, and because the number was unlisted, I never called. That's still one of my number-one fumbled moments and I still kick myself over it, and I sometimes wonder how things could have been different if I had made that call. But hey, I try not to think about it too much. She's probably happy and married.
I'm confident that will eventually be me one day though. There's a saying that you can attract the ones you want if you're happy. People will be able to tell that you're happy, they'll also be able to feel it.
It all started when I had a tightening in my chest and realized I needed to do something. I ended up signing up with a gym. I now have 3 sessions a week, and people recognize me, smile at me, and know me by name. It has become a new lifestyle for me. In doing so, I've not only lost weight, but I've gained new confidence and a new outlook on life. People around me comment to me how much I've changed, how much more positive I am. I also feel better about myself knowing that I'm doing something, and I also feel more healthy. So, all it takes is that one step.
In High School, I went to a summer camp. I ended up having a crush on this one girl. We ended up sharing a canoe together. There was this powerful attraction going on, to the point that she must have felt it too, because at the end of camp, when we were sitting in the cafeteria, she had a friend send me a note with her phone number. Back then, I was highly skeptical, having had lots of pranks and bullying done on me, and I didn't know what to think of it. Also, at the time, I had no idea who the girl actually was. I didn't know her name. But I searched the phone book, and because the number was unlisted, I never called. That's still one of my number-one fumbled moments and I still kick myself over it, and I sometimes wonder how things could have been different if I had made that call. But hey, I try not to think about it too much. She's probably happy and married.
I'm confident that will eventually be me one day though. There's a saying that you can attract the ones you want if you're happy. People will be able to tell that you're happy, they'll also be able to feel it.
I know I'm not the most confident of people when it comes to members of the opposite sex. I know the feeling about being bullied at school you do get somewhat skeptical that this is just a prank. Looking back with hindsight it's easy to say I would have had nothing to lose but such is life. Perhaps being the youngest in the year didn't help matters.
So even now I know I do tend to be nervous about approaching members of the opposite sex, and I know it really all traces back to my School days. Though I still try every now and then.
Well I don't know what you're like in RL, but you're a lot of fun to hang out with online, Owain!
Aww, thanks Kes! That means a lot to me!
This is true for EVERYONE--skinny, fat, beautiful, ugly or whatever adjective you want to apply to a person.
I'm joining the pity party late but your situation doesn't sound entirely different than my experiences.
Being a single guy in your mid to late 30's is a double-edged sword but you're only focusing on one of the edges. Not always having someone to share those special moments with does suck. Personally I've found that even making new friends becomes exponentially harder at this age because a lot of people my age are settling down and taking themselves out of the picture. I have a small group of close friends but it's not even close to what it was in my 20's and early 30's. Fortunately I don't need that many friends as long as my core group of friends is stable.
But OTOH, you have the freedom to do whatever you want. Want to take off on a vacation and backpack across Europe? Your friends who are married with children can't do that. Want to buy a shiny new HDTV to watch sports and movies on? You don't have to justify that purchase to anyone.
To be honest, I'm perfectly happy being single in my late 30's. I have a good job and I don't have to answer to anyone; I'm responsible enough to keep it real and not abuse that privilege (much). With the amount of complaining about their families/kids I see from some of my friends, I have to wonder why they decided to settle down, get married or have kids. Because that's what society thinks is normal? That's not a good enough excuse for me. Don't get me wrong--I know plenty of people are happy in doing so and that's great for them. But it's clearly not the path for everyone.
Try looking at the other edge of the sword and you might just gain a new appreciation for your situation.
I have a few close friends and most of them I've known for quite a while. I think you've hit the nail on the head. Sure it's great to be able to do what you want, when you want, when you're single. But as you say sometimes you want that someone special to share those things with.
For some there perhaps there is a tipping point, where instead of being happy yo do things on your own, you want to do thoser things with someone special.
For some there perhaps there is a tipping point, where instead of being happy yo do things on your own, you want to do thoser things with someone special.
Oh, I meant to post this with my post. This video is a reminder that we can all effect some change if we put our minds to it. A disabled veteran was told by doctors he'd never walk unassisted again, and he believed it. For years, he pretty much gave up. The video speaks for itself:
[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448[/yt]
[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448[/yt]
That's excellent work; you should be very proud of yourself because a lot of people are never able to make a change like that. Well done.
Do you all have death wishes?
When I think about putting in for transfers, I want them to count for something. I want them to be worthwhile. I'm not going to transfer to run away from my fears, I'll face them head on instead and do something. I'll define myself by what I do instead of thinking about what might be or might've been.
I'll be remembered by history for courage, bravery, and conviction. Or I'll be forgotten and my son who grows up to look just like me will turn out to be a bad seed who was promoted to his level of incompetence. Either way.
Thanks! I think that there are a lot of people who don't realize how easy excersize can be and are intimidated by it, thinking it's all about heavy weights or pushing yourself hard, to be like the biggest loser on TV. It isn't. It's all about making constant progress and slowly building up your abilities. Throughout, I've gained more stamina than I've ever had. It feels good to unlock abilities you never knew you had. It also helps that I've got my brother's wedding to look forward to next year, so it gives me a goal and time to trim down and fit into something nice
If you've reported that the light is broken, and he won't let you get it fixed, why not remind him of THAT next time he bitches that it's broken? Pretty easy to put it back on him rather than being quiet and looking incompetent. If there's a way to do a written request for repair, even better. Doesn't SOUND like the issue is done if he's still bitching about it, as you reported.
Maybe he's just using it as an example of why he doesn't think you're doing all that great a job. Yeah, he's also screwing up, but you're not exactly a shining star of management if you can't figure out how to get it repaired, won't push to get it done, and consider your job "done" with a shitty broken light fixture featured in your department.
Then again, the thing with the boss really isn't the issue, you just added that in later anyway. Everyone has people at work that are a pain in the ass. You led with the real reason (having to work with this girl you're attracted to and don't have the balls to actually approach).
^ His real problem is the lack of drive and initiative in general and, specifically, in regards to making needed changes in his life. Changes that he know he needs to make but lacks the self-discipline to actually put forth the necessary effort.
Everything else is window dressing for that fundamental problem.
Mr Awe
Everything else is window dressing for that fundamental problem.
Mr Awe
doubleohfive
Fleet Admiral
Another interesting blog article that may be of use to some 'round these parts:
http://www.g33kwatch.com/editorials/geek-advice/geek-advice-guys-oblivious-to-flirting/
http://www.g33kwatch.com/editorials/geek-advice/geek-advice-guys-oblivious-to-flirting/
That article is the story of my life.
doubleohfive
Fleet Admiral
You flirt with geeks who don't pick up on your signals?
Well, no, it's more like I'm the geek who doesn't pick up on the subtle signals.
doubleohfive
Fleet Admiral
So what are you going to do about it?
We've got 10 years of data on that one. He's going to start a thread every 3-4 months complaining about it, then sidetrack it onto something else or ask for it to be closed.
As far as real life actions? Nothing. Hope for someone else to take the ininitiative and do the heavy lifting for him.
As far as real life actions? Nothing. Hope for someone else to take the ininitiative and do the heavy lifting for him.
