I think I need a transfer...

[Trekker4747]

Out of the job at my current location and into another one, I just need to wait for something to open up. Nothing is necessarily wrong with my current location. (Other than my boss being a complete jerk but he's upsetting virtually everyone.) But, well, it's becoming painful to work here.

Anymore my emotions have been very unstable as things are just starting to work their way out and everytime I see this one (female) co-worker I get angry. With myself, not her. Because, well, I see her as an example of everything I want but know that I cannot, and will never, have.

So I need to move to a location with less attractive female staff or at least ones I won't long for.

 

[auntiehill]

^If the problem is with your emotions and how you view your life, then changing locations will not solve the problem.

 

[Kestra]

http://www.trekbbs.com/showpost.php?p=5721277&postcount=110

http://www.trekbbs.com/showpost.php?p=5723584&postcount=122

 

[wissaboo]

So I need to move to a location with less attractive female staff or at least ones I won't long for.

how are you gonna ensure that? and if you do find a place what happens if they hire someone you find attractive?

 

[Tora Ziyal]

So I need to move to a location with less attractive female staff or at least ones I won't long for.

So every time you encounter someone you long for you're going to run away?

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Trekker, why do you even make these threads when all they do is call attention to how unpleasant and unhappy you are? You get the same advice every time, and you get pissy about it every time.

 

[Trekker4747]

Sometimes I need to press the release valve and it gets the better of me.

 

[Kestra]

You should start a blog or LJ or something. I'm not being snarky here, I really think you should. Mine is full of all sorts of venting woe-is-me cryptic rants that no one cares about and don't feel the need to solve. It's perfect.

 

[RAMA]

As usual, if your probs are about women, you simply need to find one who is single, shares a decent percentages of your interests, and are comfortable around...its really not that hard.

 

[smiki]

So I need to move...

No, you need to make a move on her. Or at least try.

 

[Locutus of Bored]

[armchair psychology hat on] Honestly, I don't think Trekker should ask anyone out at this time. Dating a woman is not going to magically solve all of his problems overnight. He'll still have the same self-destructive personality issues, it'll just involve another person getting emotionally dragged into his problems as well. He needs to get right with himself before he worries about bringing someone new into his life.

You're way too fixated on the idea that you need to define yourself by being in a relationship and that by failing to do so right this minute, it means you can't be happy. Try and work on (through counseling) being able to be happy of your own accord, and then when you're in a better place mentally, you'll be better prepared to deal with the dating scene. Because you're going to face rejection and heartbreak on occasion even when you are dating, so you have to be okay with yourself first in order to be able to handle it.

You're just too depressed and down on yourself right now to do anything more than making fixing those problems your top priority. [/armchair psychology hat off]

 

[CaptJimboJones]

Why not just relax and enjoy the eye candy? I work with a number of very attractive women and that's what I do.

 

[MacLeod]

Most people don't mind working around members of the opposite gender they find attractive.

Sure I can certainly empthaise with being single, would I like to have found my signifigant other sure. But most days I'm happy with who I am, yes there are days when being single gets me down a little but such is life.

I know what it's like to get the "Thanks but no" treatment, being virtually ignorred by women who go for my taller friends etc.. I know that can deflate someones self-confidence, and when you get that yes you get a major boost to it.

 

[Yoda]

Trust me, working a job that involves zero interaction with attractive women is not that great either Trekker

 

[Kelthaz]

So I need to move to a location with less attractive female staff or at least ones I won't long for.

Yes, I completely understand how you feel. Working alongside beautiful women is a curse than no man would wish upon his worst enemy. I'll tell ya what, I'll be a real pal and switch jobs with you. What do you say?

 

[doubleohfive]

Out of the job at my current location and into another one, I just need to wait for something to open up. Nothing is necessarily wrong with my current location. (Other than my boss being a complete jerk but he's upsetting virtually everyone.) But, well, it's becoming painful to work here.

Having a jerk for a boss can be a real pain. I've worked for my fair share of douchebags over the years, so I can relate. The question is though: why is he a jerk? Have you tried approaching him about whatever behavior it is that is setting you off?

Anymore my emotions have been very unstable as things are just starting to work their way out and everytime I see this one (female) co-worker I get angry. With myself, not her.

This is a serious issue Treker, and one that has been plaguing you for quite a while. Have you sought out any kind of professional help for this?

Because, well, I see her as an example of everything I want but know that I cannot, and will never, have.

Dude, you know I'm in your corner on stuff like this but come on. That's hardly fair to you and its also a bit melodramatic.

So I need to move to a location with less attractive female staff or at least ones I won't long for.

I don't think that's the answer. I think that some of the people who have posted in this thread already (however insensitive their comments may have been) are pointing you on the right track: focus on yourself for a while, figure out what it is you want and the things that make you happy.

 

[Trekker4747]

Having a jerk for a boss can be a real pain. I've worked for my fair share of douchebags over the years, so I can relate. The question is though: why is he a jerk? Have you tried approaching him about whatever behavior it is that is setting you off?

He's a micro-managing weasel constantly keeping us woefully understaffed while demanding more.

This is a serious issue Treker, and one that has been plaguing you for quite a while. Have you sought out any kind of professional help for this?

I've been on anti-depressants for some time now and for the last 8 months or so have been working with a therapist. (Which ever kind isn't "a doctor.")

Dude, you know I'm in your corner on stuff like this but come on. That's hardly fair to you and its also a bit melodramatic.

I dunno, my self-confidence is shot and I don't have anything in me anymore. More and more I feel like a diabetic in a candy factory.

I don't think that's the answer. I think that some of the people who have posted in this thread already (however insensitive their comments may have been) are pointing you on the right track: focus on yourself for a while, figure out what it is you want and the things that make you happy.

Yeah, I don't think a transfer is reasonable either but more than anything else I want away from this boss. And I know what it is I want to make me happier but it saddens me because I feel I can never have it.

 

[Balrog]

Sometimes I need to press the release valve and it gets the better of me.

Some people get a Twitter account, or bake cookies.

Bake cookies.

 

[Locutus of Bored]

I think that some of the people who have posted in this thread already (however insensitive their comments may have been) are pointing you on the right track: focus on yourself for a while, figure out what it is you want and the things that make you happy.

If that's directed at me (since it paraphrases my advice) I'm a bit lost. My advice was genuine and not intended to be insensitive at all. It's blunt, but sugar-coating things isn't going to do him any favors.

 

[Kestra]

I think that some of the people who have posted in this thread already (however insensitive their comments may have been) are pointing you on the right track: focus on yourself for a while, figure out what it is you want and the things that make you happy.

If that's directed at me (since it paraphrases my advice) I'm a bit lost. My advice was genuine and not intended to be insensitive at all. It's blunt, but sugar-coating things isn't going to do him any favors.

You're a monster!


On topic though, I'm confused as to whether Trekker wants a transfer to get away from his boss, or from the girl? Is it both, or are you being melodramatic about the girl and it's just the boss you want away from? Because that's a different story.