Awww. 
Anti-Valentines Day
- Thread starter Gil T.Azell
- Start date
Don't forget November 1st,
That's even better... you get huge bags of chocolate bars!
Somehow I have a bad feeling about this V-day. I'm sure I will be disappointed... which is why I have ended up in this thread.
It can't be bad. You've already gotten flowers!
Which is why I'm staying off Facebook and stuff, staying in.
My success with women is worse than the Lotto 3rd prizes.
Who needs women anyway? 
Lumi this is what you do. About a week before Val day you sit him down and tell him, "I know you may not care about this but it is quite important to me, just like blahblah is important to you and I make an effort to participate in it with you. Here is my list of 5 things you could get me for Val day. They are a mix of prices and ease to acquire, you can pick out any single item on this list and I will be very happy."
This is what I do for my birthday, present a list and let the other half know that I expect to receive something on it. Since my list includes stuff you have to order online I present it quite ahead of time, but for Val day you wouldn't have to. Make sure you give CLEAR instructions for such completely obvious things such as where flowers are sold. Assume nothing.
This will work.
This is what I do for my birthday, present a list and let the other half know that I expect to receive something on it. Since my list includes stuff you have to order online I present it quite ahead of time, but for Val day you wouldn't have to. Make sure you give CLEAR instructions for such completely obvious things such as where flowers are sold. Assume nothing.
This will work.
I did say something to him. He got a card, etc...
Hmm, thank you for the advice. I'm not sure I'd be able to do that though. I don't really want gifts, I just want him to acknowledge me a bit more on that particular night... pay some special attention to me. Just be romantic. He can be romantic but it's always on his terms. I tried to romance him but it didn't really work out. And now, the thing that always happens on V-Day for me, is happening again.
Who needs women anyway?
Mars.
Thank you
Who needs women anyway?
Men.
I totally get that. For me it was, this person is NOT naturally inclined towards romance, it's like a foreign language to how their brain works. However gifts are a tangible representation of romance and are certainly better than nothing, for one thing they make it easier not to be embittered about the lack of romance. So in a way it is a compromise for both of us. I loosen up on the romance expectation and he loosens up on his obliviousness because, well, he HAS a list with instructions.
It's an imperfect world and relationships always have these jarring elements where what is obvious to one is invisible to the other. The thing is though there are different reasons for someone not acknowledging something they realize you would like them to acknowledge. If it is a matter of control on their part then you have a problem, a potentially serious problem that will flow over into other much more important areas of your relationship. If they are just being a dick then all you have is a dick, which can usually be lived with and sometimes even surprises you by rising to the occasion!
*cough*
I remind myself that I was attracted to a smart math person and that not quite getting the importance of some stuff for me is a byproduct of him being that smart math person. I mean seriously, would Mr. Spock acknowledge Valentines day? I don't think so.
Who needs women anyway?
Men.
Yep, I see my vent lasted longer that Feb. 14, so this can close now.
I think it's an interesting discussion that has to do with more than Val day.
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