Since last year I have been attending classes at the local community college in an attempt to better myself. I didn't go in expecting to make friends, as many of the people there were a lot older than me or a bit strange, but I have actually ended up making some good friends! But there was one girl in some of my classes who I never talked to much. Even though she was hot I wasn't sure if I liked her as she always seemed a bit smug and haughty. One time I nearly walked into her in a corridor and she tutted and said "watch it!" She sounded serious so I said "NO" at her face. She looked a bit surprised then just kind of backed away. I think she respected me after that. We had a few similar run-ins over the next few weeks and each time I felt relationships softening, even though I still wasn't sure if I even liked her.
One day I had forgotten to bring a pen to class and I was looking for a pen and I thought my friend was standing there and I asked him for a pen. But it wans't my friend, it was the girl and she gave me a pen! So smiled at me as I did so! It was then that I realized what I had thought had been annoyance had actually been a sexual attraction. I smiled back and from that day on we began talking to each other about our classes and even other things.
One day she was sitting near me talking to two girls she is friends with and I was listening. She was talking about how she was going to church after class to help out with a food collection for homeless people and asking if the two girls wanted to come. They both said they had prior engagements (I'm 99.9999% sure they were lying) and the girl looked sad. I instantly blurted out "I'll help you!" She looked surprised and her true friends looked at each other and I think rolled their eyes but I couldn't see. I quickly explained that I used to work at a soup kitchen with my aunt and I had experience and could be useful if things got tough with the homeless. She laughed (told you she was warming to me) and said she'd be fine but if I wanted to come along I was welcome. I knew it wasn't a date but I couldn't help feeling like it was!
We got on great at the church. I told her about all my experiences (with a few selective edits lol!) and she listened and I could tell she was seeing a new side to me and liking it. I went to the church with her several times after that. I worked really hard and it impressed her. We started hanging around each other all the time (at college and on the way to the church.) I eventually plucked up the courage to ask her if she wanted to do something outside of education/charity work and she said definitely when she wasn't too busy. I held her hand for a few moments after that.
But then I began to suspect she might be a Christian.
When I'd asked her how she'd found out about the food collection she'd said she'd learned it "at church". That was my first clue. My second clue came when one of our professors told a joke about Adam and Eve. Everyone in the class laughed (even the muslim guy I'm friends with!) but she just looked pissed off, like her old haughty self before I dressed her down in that corridor.
The thing is, a few months ago I was a gnostic and wouldn't have cared if she was a Christian, a jew or even a Satanist. But late last year my friend Karissa started sending me links to Richard Dawkings videos on YouTube and they changed my LIFE. Even though at first I thought he was just a jerk I came to find that the truths he spoked were undeniable and that all Christians are seriously deluded. I couldn't believe I was so passive about it before. I even plan on reading his books. Yes I believe in living and letting living, but if I'm going to date a girl then I have to be thinking long terms and there's no way I'd want to raise children with someone with who I have such fundamental differences with and whose beliefs I can't respect. And yet she is a really nice person and I really do love spending time with her. I even enjoy helping the needy when I'm around her. She makes everything feel good. But what do I do when religion comes up as it inevitably will? I don't want to hurt her by explaining why everything she believes in is wrong. What if she took it badly and didn't even except my arguments? But I can't be with her much longer with this huge elephant coming between us. I can feel it gnawing at me everytime I'm around her now. It's bound to come up soon!
What should I do? Has anyone here ever had a similar problem?
One day I had forgotten to bring a pen to class and I was looking for a pen and I thought my friend was standing there and I asked him for a pen. But it wans't my friend, it was the girl and she gave me a pen! So smiled at me as I did so! It was then that I realized what I had thought had been annoyance had actually been a sexual attraction. I smiled back and from that day on we began talking to each other about our classes and even other things.
One day she was sitting near me talking to two girls she is friends with and I was listening. She was talking about how she was going to church after class to help out with a food collection for homeless people and asking if the two girls wanted to come. They both said they had prior engagements (I'm 99.9999% sure they were lying) and the girl looked sad. I instantly blurted out "I'll help you!" She looked surprised and her true friends looked at each other and I think rolled their eyes but I couldn't see. I quickly explained that I used to work at a soup kitchen with my aunt and I had experience and could be useful if things got tough with the homeless. She laughed (told you she was warming to me) and said she'd be fine but if I wanted to come along I was welcome. I knew it wasn't a date but I couldn't help feeling like it was!
We got on great at the church. I told her about all my experiences (with a few selective edits lol!) and she listened and I could tell she was seeing a new side to me and liking it. I went to the church with her several times after that. I worked really hard and it impressed her. We started hanging around each other all the time (at college and on the way to the church.) I eventually plucked up the courage to ask her if she wanted to do something outside of education/charity work and she said definitely when she wasn't too busy. I held her hand for a few moments after that.
But then I began to suspect she might be a Christian.
When I'd asked her how she'd found out about the food collection she'd said she'd learned it "at church". That was my first clue. My second clue came when one of our professors told a joke about Adam and Eve. Everyone in the class laughed (even the muslim guy I'm friends with!) but she just looked pissed off, like her old haughty self before I dressed her down in that corridor.
The thing is, a few months ago I was a gnostic and wouldn't have cared if she was a Christian, a jew or even a Satanist. But late last year my friend Karissa started sending me links to Richard Dawkings videos on YouTube and they changed my LIFE. Even though at first I thought he was just a jerk I came to find that the truths he spoked were undeniable and that all Christians are seriously deluded. I couldn't believe I was so passive about it before. I even plan on reading his books. Yes I believe in living and letting living, but if I'm going to date a girl then I have to be thinking long terms and there's no way I'd want to raise children with someone with who I have such fundamental differences with and whose beliefs I can't respect. And yet she is a really nice person and I really do love spending time with her. I even enjoy helping the needy when I'm around her. She makes everything feel good. But what do I do when religion comes up as it inevitably will? I don't want to hurt her by explaining why everything she believes in is wrong. What if she took it badly and didn't even except my arguments? But I can't be with her much longer with this huge elephant coming between us. I can feel it gnawing at me everytime I'm around her now. It's bound to come up soon!
What should I do? Has anyone here ever had a similar problem?
