Cap Con 77: Last stop for next 200 lys

[Nerys Myk]

But first, the WINNERS!

CAN'T IT BE BOTH AWARD

Thanks for the win, Nerys Myk!

Hoshi: "I think it's the audio track for an exercise video or a porn film. I can't tell which."

BE VEWY VEWY QUIET AWARD

Rom #1: Y'know, sneaking up on people like that would be a lot easier if we had cloaking devices.
Rom #2: Shut up, it'll work.

From the Famous Last Words Collection

BACON OR SAUSAGE AWARD

Reed: "Sir, you are reallymaking me uncomfortable... can we just have breakfast?"

NOT REALLY HELPING AWARD

Archer: "Yep. That's gonna leave a mark."

The prize:

Your personal Star Trek cannon!

 

[Nerys Myk]

And now, this months pics:

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Thanks for the win, Nerys Myk!

Phlox: "According to my medical files on human male anatomy, this thing should be bigger."

Archer: "This is where the Proteus is? They'll never make it to the tear ducts in time! We'll have to try to piss them out!"

 

[LeadHead]

Malcolm: And how is this going to help my hernia?!

Phlox: Whoops, wrong patient.

Archer: According to these test results, Trip is Pregnant again.

Trip: Smells great, Cap'n!

T'Pol: Now I know we'll never date!

Archer: What's his leg doing on the floor?

 

[Bob Karo]

Test Audiences: Should we really be seeing this!?!

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Phlox: "Breath. Now push..."

Archer: "Pregnant??"

Trip spits his food out.

Trip: "Pregnant?!?? Again?!?"

T'pol: "Mr. Reed is pregnant."

Trip: "Oh, well. That's alright. Carry on."

 

[Skywalker]

Archer: "It's too bad. Trevor was a good helmsman, and a good friend."
Phlox: "His name was Travis, Captain."
Archer: "Godspeed, Mister Mayflower."

 

[Velocity]

Trip: You're right, T'Pol, it IS the broccoli and not you.

 

[huskers57]

And now, this months pics:

No caption needed...

Humanoid Biological Scan? I don't get it...

T'Pol: "I do not believe that you will be able to see your reflection no matter how close you look."

Similar to the Nicholas Cage vampire photos of the early 21st century, it is discovered that a man resembling Tuvok was once aboard Enterprise!

 

[Mistral]

Trip: "I think its corned beef hash."

T'Pol: "We ran out of corned beef two weeks ago."

Trip: "Then what-?"

T'Pol: "I do not know-but I'm sticking to water for the rest of the trip."

 

[Captain Crow]

Phlox: He's dead.

Archer: Oh, great. Now who are we going to ignore?

Archer: Is that Malcolm's... ?

Phlox: Yes it is. He suffers from WLTS.

Archer: WLTS?

Phlox: Wandering Left Testical Syndrome.

 

[Bob Karo]

Now on the new Ultra Special Edition Blu-Rays! The deleted scene they didn't want you to see!

Phlox: Thank you for coming down here, Captain. The good news is that Mr Mayweather will survive. Unfortunately, he'll never regain his ability to speak...

 

[LeadHead]

Now on the new Ultra Special Edition Blu-Rays! The deleted scene they didn't want you to see!

Phlox: Thank you for coming down here, Captain. The good news is that Mr Mayweather will survive. Unfortunately, he'll never regain his ability to speak...

Archer: He could before?

 

[Kotik]

Nope, Kelby is just as useless in the galley...

-'E's dead, Captain
- No he's just resting
- Look, matey, I know a dead helmsman when I see one, and I'm looking at one now
- 'E's pinning for the stars

 

[Ayelbourne]

Trip: As a member of the community of the visually impaired, I take offense at you calling me extremely short sighted.

 

[Captain Crow]

Trip, sniffing food: Oh, great! The Captain's damn dog took a dump in my food... again.

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Malcolm: "Touch me there again and your three wives will be very, very , very disappointed got it!"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

I think your sig is more appropriate to this picture..

Phlox: "Religion is like a penis, Everyone around it is nuts or an asshole "

 

[ChristopherPike]

Trip: "Hmmmm. Well now. Not sure about fish but I'm definitely getting cat..."

 

[ChristopherPike]

Archer: "Geeze, these Rigellian spaceport bodyscanners really leave nothing to the imagination.

It's a total invasion of privacy."

Trip: "Says the guy who delayed us an extra 10 minutes getting down here, because he insisted on being thorough with the decon gel on the Subcommander here!"

Archer: "Look, I've told you before... that's different. It's better to be safe than sorry.

Hey, even Reed's secret stash of Venus Drugs wasn't safe. They missed where he secreted the hard stuff though."

Trip: "Good job nobody asked him to touch his toes or we'd all be facing a prison sentence."