Movie Caption Contest #203: "Foolish Human Emotions"

[Mr Silver]

Greetings folks, you know the drill! It's time to recognise...

Because predictions were a "Russian inwention"...

Chekov: Oh, sir! It was Khan! He showed us what that woman behind me is going to look like in about 30 years.

The "Kraftwerk Standard Of Excellence" award goes to...

11 of 38 (singing in monotone):

It's not that easy being 520 nanometers
Having to spend each cycle lasing from aluminium gallium nitride
When I think it could be nicer being 580, 640, or 700 nanometers
Or something much more colorful like that

It's not that easy being 520 nanometers
It seems you aren't disguishable from so many other randomly selected things
And other drones tend to pass you over
Because you're not differentiated
Like dynamic electromagnetic radiation scattered in liquid dihydrogen oxide
Or stars in space

But organic structures in certain hemispheres reflect radiation at 520 nanometers when their planets pass through their ascending nodes
And 520 nanometers can be cool and friendly-like
And 520 nanometers can be big like a nebula
Or important like wrinkled crust between tectonic plates
Or tall like a space elevator

When 520 nanometers is all there is to be
It could make you wonder why
But why wonder why wonder
I am 520 nanometers, and it'll do fine
It's beautiful, and I think it's what I want to be

Because some things are best left in the past...

Lou Bega: Ladies and gentlemen, this is Mambo No. 5...

And the "Photoshop" award for uncovering Picard's musical atrocities goes to...

PICARD'S NEIGHBOR (os): I liked it better when he played the flute.

Well done to all the winners! Now onto the new contest...

Kirk and Scotty discuss the weapon found in the reactor room and the whereabouts of Chekov... (points for uncovering the obscure joke)

Kirk is informed that JT Esteban is commanding the science mission to the Genesis planet...

And Picard has too much Saurian brandy and decides to try out the latest Dixon Hill holonovel without reading the script...

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Thanks for the honor, Admiral M!

Kirk: Mister Scott, I'm impressed. All your lights are blinking in sequence.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTTY: Aye, there was a time I could fit in a tube that size.

[/QUOTE]

PICARD: Eat lead coppers!!!!!!!

 

[Maurice]

KIRK: Nice forced perspective,
SCOTTY: Up yer shaft...sir.

 

[NathanielM]

SCOTTY: Aye, I told ya everything would be in order sir!
Kirk: Yea, but what about those blue things?

PICARD: Say heellllo to mai little friend Tommy!

 

[bullethead]

Kirk: Scotty, I'm impressed by how smoothly things are running, but are two giants enough to watch the warp core?

Kirk always enjoyed a good joke, especially after a few cups of Romulan Ale.

After traveling back in time, Picard had only one objective: kill the parents of the people who would create Star Trek: Nemesis.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Scotty: "Stick around, Admiral, if ye wanna see somethin' funny! We're gonna drop a quarter on the floor and watch the kid with gloves try to pick it up!"

Lady in black hat screaming in background: "Ya might actually hit somethin' if ya kept yer eyes open, ya jamoke!"

 

[Mr Silver]

The first person to make an equally lame obscure caption in relation to the one I made earlier, will be a winner when the contest ends.

 

[inflatabledalek]

Scotty: So I traded all our radiation suits for a crate of whisky. It's not like we'll need 'em on a wee training mission. And it means I get to be pissed the whole time.

Kirk: Like now?

Scotty: Aye.

Shatner: If they let Nimoy direct then that means one day I too will helm a classic Star Trek film!

Picard: Damn, I wanted to access the porn spoof holodeck program, Dicks On Hill.

 

[SeerSGB]

Kirk: Christ, the whiskey stink in so bad you'd think this was a brewery.
Ensign Abrams: That's going in the fanfic!

Kirk: You didn't
Scotty: I did
Kirk: No you really didn't
Scotty: I really did
Kirk: you turned the intermix chamber into a giant bong?!
Preston: PARTY SHIP TO RISA!

 

[Nerys Myk]

Contest Crossover Caption

PICARD: Die Romulan Scum!!!!

ROMULAN: Uh, we're over here.

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk, stoned: Man, Carl was right. This is some good shit.

Kirk: I like pie.

Picard: THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS BITCHES!!

 

[Captain Crow]

Scotty: This stuff doesn't react well to bullets so I hope we don't have a gun fight in here.

Kirk: Yeah, like there's really going to be a gun fight in here.

[moments later]

 

[Smellincoffee]

Kirk: I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
McCoy: Give it up, Jim, that line was tired ten years ago. And if you can't hear him, it's because you left your hearing aid at the bar when you took it out to try and pick up that green gal --

Picard: I'M SORRY. I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF HOW AWESOME I AM.


..AND ALSO THIS MACHINE GUN.

 

[Captain Crow]

Picard: SHUT UP, WEASLEY!!

 

[BriGuy]

Scott: Yes, sir, it is a long, smooth shaft. But I dunno what ya are gettin' at...

 

[BriGuy]

And there was this time... when I was a kid... I took that bastard's antique Corvette and drove it right into a ravine...

 

[inflatabledalek]

Shatner: I've had a vision of the future! A new actor playing Kirk! He looks so stupid, with that ridiculous hair and camp performance style. Whoever that is in Star Trek: Generations they should be ashamed. Old fart.

 

[BriGuy]

Old Trek vs New Trek, Lesson 1

In "old" Trek, Scotty has to take shore leave to find himself in a brewery.

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: It's quite impressive, Mr. Scott.

Scotty: That's right my toupee wearin' honky. This shaft is one bad muthaf...

Kirk: Shut your mouth!

Scotty: I'm just talkin' about the shaft!