DS9 Caption Contest #36: Cause for Concern

[LeadHead]

Happy Weekend to all of you Ladies and Gentlemen! Sorry again for taking so long in setting up a new contest, the last 2 days have been crazy. Vreenak, have you anything to say?

First up to the plate, we have the "Could be a Bestseller" Award goes to:

Jadzia: Working on a novel, eh?

Julian: (Turn it off quickly) Yeah.

Jadzia: What does it have the words; Jadzia, leather and lingerie in the same sentence?

Next, we have the "Solving the Energy Crisis" Award, going to:

Odo "Half the time we just put the lights on and prisoners assume there's a forcefield. It saves on electricity."

Next, we have the "You didn't think the Baseball was just for show, did you?" Award, goes to:

Quark: The Klingons are tearing apart my bar! What are you going to do about this?
Sisko: Wise magic baseball, tell me the answer!.... It says "try again later", sorry Quark!

Next, the "Priorities" Award goes to:

O'Brian: I'll let you out of there as soon as I run to the loo. Gimme a minute, alright?
Alien: But our air will be depleted in 34 seconds!
O'Brian: Just gimme a minute!

When a man's gotta go, he's gotta go.

Next, the "Heroes in the Half Shell, Turtle Power!" Award, goes to:

Rom: "GO NINJA, GO NINJA, GO!"

There were two Photoshops that had me bigtime here, I couldn't choose, so we have 2 awards!

OBRIEN: I think you guys got the wrong station!

And...

Worf: "Odo, why all the mirrors in this cell?"
Odo: "What mirrors?"
Worf: "Uh... I think I have what is known as a hangover."
Odo: "That's not the only thing you have. Quark is on his way over to report on the damages you incurred to his premises."
Worf: "It is HIS fault for serving me fermented prune juice!"

O'Brien: "Sorry, Keiko already has enough Avon."

Thanks to all who participated and congrats to all of our winners! Lets get our new pictures captioned!

Here we go!

 

[LeadHead]

Quark: Crawling through the conduits doesn't agree with my lobes.

Sisko: While you're out, get a few 6 packs.

Sisko: HEADS UP!

Kira: Huh?

Worf: Her snoring is dishonorable.

Bashir: It's GOOD!

 

[Smellincoffee]

Every Starfleet officer knew what to do when a Bajoran started to sneeze.

Sisko: Miles Edward O'Brien, what happened to my replicator repair order?
O'Brien: I've been working on the fusion reactor, sir. Could've blown any minute.
Sisko: Well, I need a RAKTAJINO! Where are your priorities?!

Worf: I believe now I must begin the post-coitus ritual known as "The Walk of Shame".

 

[Finn]

Carey: Sir, I protest. I don't think you should have given the job to Chief O'Brien. I'm an officer.

Sisko: Oh, don't worry. I'll pull strings and have you put on one of those new Intrepid class starships as Chief Engineer.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Quark: "Will you stop breathing through your mouth, you dope!"
Rom: "Uhhhh! How else can I breathe, brother."
Quark: "I don't care, as long as it stops feeling like I'm getting Oomox from my own brother."

O'Brien: "Oh, Hi Captain! Shaved again huh? You know, you looked younger with the beard."
Sisko: "I'm too old for this shit."

Kira: "Guys! Duck!" Duck quacks "Anas platyrhynos... very unusual sighting for this time of year."
Jadzia: "Duck... Duck... Duck means DUCK, duck doesn't mean DUCK!...I hate my life."

Worf muttering: "Hogging my antique tribbleskin blanket is not honourable."

Bashir: "I was telling Jadzia last night that..." watch beeps "Oh, excuse me for a minute...

All hail the hypnotoad...

Where was I? Oh yeah, Jadzia thought..."

O'Brien: "You know, you're adherence to religious tenets can be damned inconvenient at times."

 

[Finn]

Bashir: (OS) I was checking out scenarios from the Korean War for the holosuite. Look what I found.

O'Brien: Bloody Hell!

 

[Isis]

Quark: ♫ They're creepy and they're kooky ♫
Rom: ♫ Mysterious and spooky ♫
Quark and Rom in unison: ♫ They're all together ooky...

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Quark (whispering): "See? It's not bifurcated at all!"
Rom: "Awk! I think he heard you!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

QUARK: There it is, an original AMT USS Reliant model. Soon it will ours!

ROM: But its not in the box.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Every morning O'Brien woke up and asked the picture: "What would Sisko do?"

Darts was not Odo's game.

WORF (typing): To: SupRDoc, MOBrien22, BucketOfFun, LatinumMan

Guys, I can confirm The spots go ALL THE WAY DOWN!

BASHIR: Oh my God!!!! Is that porcelain!!!!!

 

[Finn]

Bashir:....and that was when Nurse Daraan ran out. You should have seen the look on the Trumali delegate when he realized what she had given him *chuckle*. So I had to talk with....

O'Brien: *blinks* What did Keiko put in my coffee this time?

 

[Supernuke]

Thanks for the win, LeadHead!

Obrien: ....and that's how Molly was born

Bashir: Whoa! Way too much information! Worf? Really?

 

[Gary7]

WORF (typing): To: SupRDoc, MOBrien22, BucketOfFun, LatinumMan

Guys, I can confirm The spots go ALL THE WAY DOWN!

Hilarious!

 

[Gary7]

Major Kira forgot to do just one thing that morning... deodorant.

Bashir: "Well Miles, I just do not know what to say. You've done fabulous wonders with the place since Keiko went on vacation. And I absolutely love the window treatments! You must tell me where you got them."

Worf: (thinking) I have this feeling like I forgot to do something... what can it be? Think Worf, think...

And then he spotted it on the bureau. There it was. The unopened condom wrapper.

 

[Nerys Myk]

WORF: You'd be suprised how many possums it takes to make a blanket that size.

DAX (drowsy) Possum???

 

[Rush Limborg]

Quark: HMPH--I'll show YOU that "the bird is the word"--

Rom: Brother, bad idea!

Worf: FERENGI, YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT GESTURE!!!

Sisko: (speech) ...for my son--for all our sons...

O'Brien: So, it's true. The captain's a bloody Cardie in disguise!

Kira did not intend for her macarena lessons to be recieved like a comedy routine...but needless to say, it brought down the house.

Worf: (musing) Of course, had we really chosen to sleep "Klingon style", unconciousness would have been the least of her problems....

Bashir: I told you, Miles, "Let me keep the dart board in my quarters," but no...and now, your wife has moved it to Bird-knows where!

O'Brien: What is it with that woman?

Bashir: You know women, Chief--they must clean, regardless of--

O'Brien: Excuse me? What would you know about women's cleaning habits?

Bashir: Personal experience. I could tell you horror stories of Leeta's antics in my quarters....

 

[grabthars hammer]

Rom: This isn't Taco Bell!

Sisko (materializing): CHIEF!!! Get your hands out of there; you're on duty for goodness sake!

Kira: Wheew! Chief, if you want to reverse the polarity of something, try your colon!!!

Worf: Check-mate, Doctor Smartypants!

Bashir: The females there have three of them, and they're all THIS big!!!

 

[vermillion]

Kira was the first known victim of Double Dream Hands syndrome on DS9. Sisko, Dax and Bashir thought they shielded their eyes in time but...

Dax, talking in her sleep: No...not the... I CAN'T...please NO...no more...no more...NO MORE DOUBLE DREAM HAAAAAANDS!
Worf: I can't take this anymore. I must kill Kira first thing in the morning.

Sisko: Chief, I'm telling you this as your friend and as your commanding officer, whatever you do, DO NOT look at the Double Dream Hands dance. Run, hide, throw acid in your eyes, do whatever you need to do. Trust me, you do not want that image in your head.
Miles, chuckling: Don't worry, sir. I've spent 20 virtual years imprisoned inside my mind, I've been sexually harassed by a pah wraith, I've touched Kira's stinky bare feet and technically I'm not even the original Miles. I don't want to sound too cocky, sir, but at this point, I think I can manage pretty much anything.

Julian: Why, yes, I would love a cup of...*starts dancing like possessed*
Miles: Julian? Julian! No. No. NOOOOOO, NOT YOU TOO! DAMN YOU, DOUBLE DREAM HANDS! WHYYYYYY? SISKO WAS RIGHT, I DON'T WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE!

Rom: Uuuuuuuuuuh,brother, what's Dr. Bashir doing?
Quark: He's just being an idiotic, freaky hu-man.

 

[Mistral]

Quark: "So he arranges his fingers like this and then puts them in her-"

Rom: "That's just wrong!"

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Quark: "Yes, hello, Commander. My brother and I are here to sing you Vanilla Ice's greatest hits, as requested."

Sisko: "Just get in here. And make sure the door's locked."

Sisko: "I want them alive. No disintegrations."

Kira: "Woah hey, Worf, put that thing away. You could take somebody's eye out with that!"

Worf: "Rest, now. I will take this shift and attend to our FarmVille assets. It will be a glorious day to farm."

It didn't take long for Chief O'Brien to regret letting Doctor Bashir try out his Kinect.