IT professionals - speak regular English please

[DarthTom]

Has anyone who ever doesn't work in the IT field but has to work with IT people noticed that some 'computer geeks,' have trouble speaking in layman's English?

Error codes for propriety software written programs always have message like 'exception error 22 has occurred.' What the hell does that mean? Also, when you call people in the IT department they speak in the same lingo. Another rant - why are these same people always reluctant to push the restart button but want to instead diagnose the problem with mission critical software rather than just fixing the problem to get things going?

Speak English IT people it helps 'interface,' [ ] with the end users.

 

[Marc]

hey maybe at the same time maybe the users can get a clue so they can actually provide useful information so us IT professionals can actually help them.

 

[The Mirrorball Man]

It's a test. They're testing you to see if you're part of their special club of computer-literate people. Learn a few phrases in their language, drop them casually in conversation, and from then on you'll get special treatment by IT people (i.e. they will actually give a shit about your problems).

 

[DarthTom]

hey maybe at the same time maybe the users can get a clue so they can actually provide useful information so us IT professionals can actually help them.

This is true as well. We are as dumb asses as the Paclids [sp?] in TNG. 'It won't go, make it go.' But that is the bottom line for end users. 'It's not working, the program won't start, there is this completely obtuse error code on the screen, and I need it fixed NOW.'

 

[Santaman]

RTFM

 

[Asbo Zaprudder]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Has anyone who ever doesn't work in the IT field but has to work with IT people noticed that some 'computer geeks,' have trouble speaking in layman's English?

Error codes for propriety software written programs always have message like 'exception error 22 has occurred.' What the hell does that mean? Also, when you call people in the IT department they speak in the same lingo. Another rant - why are these same people always reluctant to push the restart button but want to instead diagnose the problem with mission critical software rather than just fixing the problem to get things going?

Speak English IT people it helps 'interface,' [ ] with the end users.

Error codes are designed for troubleshooting by developers, not end users. Ideally, you would never see such a message. But I've never seen a program that didn't have bugs.

I have no problem writing in laymen's terms. I've found that many highly technical people are bad at writing plain English, so I can't argue with that.

As far as troubleshooting the issue rather than just restarting: it's a good idea to actually fix the problem rather than just pretend it doesn't exist and hope it doesn't happen again. Taking the time to address the problem now means that mission-critical system won't go down again (hopefully.)

hey maybe at the same time maybe the users can get a clue so they can actually provide useful information so us IT professionals can actually help them.

It's a test. They're testing you to see if you're part of their special club of computer-literate people. Learn a few phrases in their language, drop them casually in conversation, and from then on you'll get special treatment by IT people (i.e. they will actually give a shit about your problems).

Bullshit. IT people believe most users are idiots because most users are idiots. They'll open any attachment, click any link, run any program--they're clueless. IT can only help you to the extent that you can a) articulate exactly what problem you are experiencing and b) make their job easier by having the slightest damn clue what you're doing.

It's not about being in a "special club," unless that club is "Computer Users with IQs Above Room Temperature."

RTFM

Word.

 

[SPOCKED]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

My IT is right next door to my office. They are prima donnas and are the first to say so. We get along great (I've worked with one of them for more than ten years) and I jab them every chance I get.

Their sheer resistance to ANY kind of physical (heavy) work is the stuff of high comedy. My partner's office got infested with ants because IT (next door) had so much food garbage behind their locked door and the ants were trailing through her office. The best part... IT is the closest office to the dumpster - it is literally 20 feet away. A year or so ago I kidded them when I found their garbage outside their door and left for housekeeping to take away (pardon the misspelled caption)

 

[TheGodBen]

Error codes for propriety software written programs always have message like 'exception error 22 has occurred.' What the hell does that mean?

Do you want to know the big secret about IT staff? They don't know what exception error 22 is either, but they know how to use Google to find out. Then they follow whatever instructions they find and hope that the problem goes away.

Another rant - why are these same people always reluctant to push the restart button but want to instead diagnose the problem with mission critical software rather than just fixing the problem to get things going?

If you think that a restart will solve the problem then do that and don't bother the poor IT staffer who might be busy making a critical decision in a game of minesweeper.

Speak English IT people it helps 'interface,' [ ] with the end users.

Most end users are idiots and they deserve to feel like idiots so that they can be shamed into not acting like idiots any more.

 

[backstept]

you may have run into a 1D10T error

 

[Robert Maxwell]

you may have run into a 1D10T error

PEBCAK!

 

[Sean Aaron]

I have no problem writing in laymen's terms. I've found that many highly technical people are bad at writing plain English, so I can't argue with that.

As far as troubleshooting the issue rather than just restarting: it's a good idea to actually fix the problem rather than just pretend it doesn't exist and hope it doesn't happen again. Taking the time to address the problem now means that mission-critical system won't go down again (hopefully.)

Too true. Especially the latter and especially when it's not a Windows server.

I'll also echo the sentiment that it's necessary to give as much and as accurate information as possible. "I cannot access xyz" doesn't really lead anywhere except to more questions.

A lot of IT staff aren't terribly skilled socially, however and can be assholes so I do have some sympathy, but stating your problem with as much information as possible - especially any error messages - and not leaving out details (like the fact that you did something stupid just prior to your problem occurring) will work wonders.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I have no problem writing in laymen's terms. I've found that many highly technical people are bad at writing plain English, so I can't argue with that.

As far as troubleshooting the issue rather than just restarting: it's a good idea to actually fix the problem rather than just pretend it doesn't exist and hope it doesn't happen again. Taking the time to address the problem now means that mission-critical system won't go down again (hopefully.)

Too true. Especially the latter and especially when it's not a Windows server.

I'll also echo the sentiment that it's necessary to give as much and as accurate information as possible. "I cannot access xyz" doesn't really lead anywhere except to more questions.

A lot of IT staff aren't terribly skilled socially, however and can be assholes so I do have some sympathy, but stating your problem with as much information as possible - especially any error messages - and not leaving out details (like the fact that you did something stupid just prior to your problem occurring) will work wonders.

Yeah, I love just hearing "x doesn't work." Great! That's such useful information!

Fortunately, the people I work with are generally well-trained and they send screenshots of exactly what they're seeing, and describe what they were doing at the time the error occurred.

Even so, there's one guy who always sends me screenshots but no context, and it's like a puzzle I have to figure out. What about this shot am I supposed to be concerned about? What's wrong here? We're talking about screenshots not showing any errors, either, just data. Like I'm a damn mind-reader.

 

[Sean Aaron]

Fun fun fun. Thankfully I don't deal with much in the way of end-user issues any more, just broke-ass servers.

My favourite end-user call is always "xxx is slow" - and?

 

[Spot's Meow]

I've tried giving as much information about the error as I can from the get go and that usually leads nowhere. I will write an email with a long paragraph of the exact issue and everything I have tried and the hours of Google searching I have done to solve it and will get something back like, "Please unplug the system and plug it back in and let me know how that works." It can be infuriating.

 

[Sean Aaron]

I've tried giving as much information about the error as I can from the get go and that usually leads nowhere. I will write an email with a long paragraph of the exact issue and everything I have tried and the hours of Google searching I have done to solve it and will get something back like, "Please unplug the system and plug it back in and let me know how that works." It can be infuriating.

Sounds like lazy-ass gits to me. You can always try to sell the idea of outsourcing to your management. Might light a fire under their asses if nothing else...

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Fun fun fun. Thankfully I don't deal with much in the way of end-user issues any more, just broke-ass servers.

My favourite end-user call is always "xxx is slow" - and?

Oh, I love that one.

"The server is running slowly."
"Yeah, I'm loading a 10-million record file onto it. It's going to be slow for a while."
"Can't you make it go faster?"
"Petition for better hardware."

I think it all stems from a general perception that computers are magic, and people who "know" computers can make them do anything through sheer force of will.

 

[backstept]

because I work in the electronics department at Walmart I'm apparently tech support . . .
"Hi, my computer has a problem?"
"Have you called the manufacturer?"
"No, but I bought it here. Can't you fix it?"

and some people who call us up on the phone get legitimately angry that I can't help them over the phone . . . I sell computers, not fix them . . .

 

[Santaman]

When I was working for a small computer firm:

Customer: Barges in yelling about a $#!! ass computer that isn't working blah blah blah.. *dumps machine on desk*

Moi: whats the matter exactly?

Customer:blah blah %!#@!!! CD-rom blah blah.

Moi: aha CD ROM doesn't seem to work.
*plugs in machine, boots, puts in CD, cheerful music starts playing.*


Customer: THATS NOT POSSIBLE!!! (near nervous breakdown) ramble blah blah... *gets machine and walks back to car*

Moi: *sigh...*

Customer's wife: "I told him that he put those CD's upside down into the drive...

 

[Robert Maxwell]

because I work in the electronics department at Walmart I'm apparently tech support . . .
"Hi, my computer has a problem?"
"Have you called the manufacturer?"
"No, but I bought it here. Can't you fix it?"

and some people who call us up on the phone get legitimately angry that I can't help them over the phone . . . I sell computers, not fix them . . .

I think that might be a little unfair. People are accustomed to taking things back to the place of purchase, if there's a problem.