Are you willing to enter into a polygamous relationship?

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

...is living by myself, cat-lady style.

You must have more than ten cats to qualify for that thou, just think of the food bill?

I have two cats now who hate all other cats but once they drop dead I would happily get 4 or 5 more cats. I couldn't manage 10 because I live in a cat-hostile area where you are not allowed to have more than 2 so 10 would be a bit hard to palm off as neighbourhood cats you know nothing about. I could get around this by moving out bush but that is living hell to me so that is never happening.

I knew a woman in Ireland who lived in a 3 story house, one of those narrow row houses I think, and they had 30 cats. Indoor cats. She said they had several litter trays in every room.

 

[Wanderlust]

Polyamory yah.

 

[JarodRussell]

This came up in another thread, and it has been suggested that it is common for regular Jane/Joe to want to be in a polygamous relationship.

So I'm curious exactly how many people here are actually willing to become an active member in a polygamy.

My current understanding is that no person would ever willingly enter into polygamy because it demeans one gender or another (typically, it's the females who are demeaned.) But depending on the results of the poll, I might be proven wrong.

I'm asking about polygamy, not polyamory. Let's ignore the legal aspect of the matter. Polygamy as defined on wiki.

Dude... threesome any time you want.

 

[Amaris]

As long as everyone involved loves one another? Certainly.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Sometimes I think this idea is a nice theory that people grok if they have not yet lived in a relationship long term. As in LIVED with someone full time. People think OH.. lots of LOVE of course that is good.. and sex, yay, and freedom, I like freedom and other people having freedom.. so yeah, this sounds cool. I could get behind it.

But actually being married and living with several people at once, making major decisions about money and lifestyle and children as a committee, delegating chores and responsibilities, taking on several other people's personal problems and issues because that's what you do when are married.. that's a lot of potential headache. It doesn't sound like freedom to me, it sounds like a lot of work.

 

[Kestra]

I think some people make it work quite well.

 

[JarodRussell]

It works in Utah.

 

[Canadave]

Sometimes I think this idea is a nice theory that people grok if they have not yet lived in a relationship long term. As in LIVED with someone full time. People think OH.. lots of LOVE of course that is good.. and sex, yay, and freedom, I like freedom and other people having freedom.. so yeah, this sounds cool. I could get behind it.

But actually being married and living with several people at once, making major decisions about money and lifestyle and children as a committee, delegating chores and responsibilities, taking on several other people's personal problems and issues because that's what you do when are married.. that's a lot of potential headache. It doesn't sound like freedom to me, it sounds like a lot of work.

Well, it may not work for you, but I've known people that it does work for. I can't say much more than that as I haven't experienced it myself, but I don't think you can just discount it out of hand like that.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

...is living by myself, cat-lady style.

You must have more than ten cats to qualify for that thou, just think of the food bill?

I have two cats now who hate all other cats but once they drop dead I would happily get 4 or 5 more cats. I couldn't manage 10 because I live in a cat-hostile area where you are not allowed to have more than 2 so 10 would be a bit hard to palm off as neighbourhood cats you know nothing about. I could get around this by moving out bush but that is living hell to me so that is never happening.

I knew a woman in Ireland who lived in a 3 story house, one of those narrow row houses I think, and they had 30 cats. Indoor cats. She said they had several litter trays in every room.

Sorry to go off thread... but I only have the one cat that is quite enough for me ~ to be woken up for first breakfast at daybreak, to then demand to go out through the window (ground floor flat, no cat flap), to then want to come back in (by jumping up at the window) for a brief nap and then demand 2nd breakfast.

I'm not sure I agree with indoor cats, I mean Sir Squeak is not an excellent hunter and would probably be a lot thinner if left to his own devices. But he does enjoy 'stretching his legs' and looks really shiny whilst basking in the sun

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

It is uncommon to have indoor cats in Australia. I've been lectured by americans about how cruel it is to let them roam free, this is from people who declaw them, a practice we don't have here. They love being outside.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

No.

I am also the jealous type. I'd be afraid that she'd love the other person more than me. I'd feel like a third wheel.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Sometimes I think this idea is a nice theory that people grok if they have not yet lived in a relationship long term. As in LIVED with someone full time. People think OH.. lots of LOVE of course that is good.. and sex, yay, and freedom, I like freedom and other people having freedom.. so yeah, this sounds cool. I could get behind it.

But actually being married and living with several people at once, making major decisions about money and lifestyle and children as a committee, delegating chores and responsibilities, taking on several other people's personal problems and issues because that's what you do when are married.. that's a lot of potential headache. It doesn't sound like freedom to me, it sounds like a lot of work.

Well, it may not work for you, but I've known people that it does work for. I can't say much more than that as I haven't experienced it myself, but I don't think you can just discount it out of hand like that.

I'm not discounting it and I'm sure it works fine for some people. I'm just commenting on how the actual nitty gritty of it is something that people who haven't actually had a longer term live in relationship don't see, they see the ideal.

 

[Goji]

No. It's difficult enough to be in sync with one other individual. And I'm not entirely sure I even see an upside.

 

[Myasishchev]

But actually being married and living with several people at once, making major decisions about money and lifestyle and children as a committeework.

You know, the sex and freedom stuff was what sounded awesomest to me, but this is actually the cincher: in a polygamous relationship, it opens up the possibility of a binding majority vote.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ Literally?

 

[infinix]

Well, it may not work for you, but I've known people that it does work for. I can't say much more than that as I haven't experienced it myself, but I don't think you can just discount it out of hand like that.

Really? You know people who are in a polygamous marriage? You are sure they aren't just in an open marriage? What's the arrangement? How many on how many?

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Polygamous marriage sounds a lot harder than open marriage or polyamory. It's like everything you get in marriage only multiplied which IMO doesn't sound very inviting.

I also think it's telling that people will be negative about marriage because it ties you down or they don't believe in it but answer positively about polygamous marriage. Once again, it's some fuzzy ideal they are glomming onto rather than thinking through the everyday realities.

 

[Shatnertage]

One set of in-laws is already kicking my ass.

I can't even imagine dealing with two.

 

[auntiehill]

Not only no, but HELL no.

 

[BlobVanDam]

It is uncommon to have indoor cats in Australia. I've been lectured by americans about how cruel it is to let them roam free, this is from people who declaw them, a practice we don't have here. They love being outside.

Uncommon in Australia? I don't know a lot of cat owners, but they all seem to be indoors from what I remember (at least partially). I sure wish my friend's cats were only outdoor cats. A lot less pissing on powerboards and computers

As for the thread topic, I voted no. I'm not opposed to other people doing so, but for me, I'd only want to be with one other person.