Since we're all sharing our daily foibles here, I thought people might get a kick out of this one.
This morning my daughter decided that, while we were at the rec center, she just had to stop by a class we're not signed up for this session, but have taken before. Since the teacher apparently thinks she's pretty cool, she invited us to stay for the class, pleasing my daughter (3 y.o.) to no end.
It's the kind of class that you have to take your shoes off for. As I squatted down to take off her shoes, I heard a distinct rip and felt a sudden change in the air pressure down south.
I had split my jeans along the seam, right in the crotch.
Because we were originally heading to an art class (which gets pretty messy) I was wearing an old pair, so this wasn't a great loss. But it was pretty embarrassing, because now my underwear are totally visible--it's about a 4-6 hole. Luckily it was on the right side, and most of the important stuff was hanging left, but still, kind of awkward.
At this point, it was a choice between running home, which would have really pissed off my daughter, or just toughing it out. I figured that if I could keep her strategically positioned in front of me, no one would really notice.
Naturally as soon as we're sitting in the circle on the floor, she crawls away and suddenly a whole room of toddlers are intensely interested in my crotch. The other mommies (I was the only dad there) were pointedly not staring, but the kids didn't have that kind of tact. One of the smaller ones even crawled over and tried to grab inside the hole.
I whipped out my phone to try to cover up, but then realized that I've got Wonder Pets! stickers all over the back, so she only became more interested in what was going on down there. Eventually her mom grabbed her away.
And since none of the other mommies know me, I'm just some strange guy who shows up at classes he's not supposed to be at with a hole in his jeans.
Kids, this is why you always want to wear clean underwear.
This morning my daughter decided that, while we were at the rec center, she just had to stop by a class we're not signed up for this session, but have taken before. Since the teacher apparently thinks she's pretty cool, she invited us to stay for the class, pleasing my daughter (3 y.o.) to no end.
It's the kind of class that you have to take your shoes off for. As I squatted down to take off her shoes, I heard a distinct rip and felt a sudden change in the air pressure down south.
I had split my jeans along the seam, right in the crotch.
Because we were originally heading to an art class (which gets pretty messy) I was wearing an old pair, so this wasn't a great loss. But it was pretty embarrassing, because now my underwear are totally visible--it's about a 4-6 hole. Luckily it was on the right side, and most of the important stuff was hanging left, but still, kind of awkward.
At this point, it was a choice between running home, which would have really pissed off my daughter, or just toughing it out. I figured that if I could keep her strategically positioned in front of me, no one would really notice.
Naturally as soon as we're sitting in the circle on the floor, she crawls away and suddenly a whole room of toddlers are intensely interested in my crotch. The other mommies (I was the only dad there) were pointedly not staring, but the kids didn't have that kind of tact. One of the smaller ones even crawled over and tried to grab inside the hole.
I whipped out my phone to try to cover up, but then realized that I've got Wonder Pets! stickers all over the back, so she only became more interested in what was going on down there. Eventually her mom grabbed her away.
And since none of the other mommies know me, I'm just some strange guy who shows up at classes he's not supposed to be at with a hole in his jeans.
Kids, this is why you always want to wear clean underwear.
You poor thing!
When I was about ten years old, my father took me shopping at a shopping center to get me a new dress I had wanted. We were just coming out of the store when his zipper broke. Of course, the car was on the other side of the parking lot. He made me walk in front of him the whole way, and wouldn't even let me carry the bag my dress was in. I didn't know what had happened til we got into the car and he grabbed a rag he always kept in the back seat to cover himself with.
