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TOS Caption Contest #198: Poker Faces

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Spock (whispering): "Sir, she's right behind you. And yes, 'Doomsday Machine' is most apt terminology."

Decker (whispering): "Really? A maw that could swallow a dozen...?"

Spock (whispering): "Yes."
 
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Shana: This iPad thing really sucks.


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Kirk: Let me get this straight. You can tell if someone masturbates a lot because one of their arms is larger than the other?

Norman: Yup.

[Kirk begins feeling his arm.]

Norman: Naw! I'm just messing with ya. Thanks for letting us all know which arm you do use though.
 
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Kirk: Let me get this straight. You can tell if someone masturbates a lot because one of their arms is larger than the other?

Norman: Yup.

[Kirk begins feeling his arm.]

Norman: Naw! I'm just messing with ya. Thanks for letting us all know which arm you do use though.
Good one! :lol:
 
Like a certain World Series MVP short stop, I saw a pitch I liked and swung for the fences.

Well I must say, congratulations--the SFG played a terrific World Series. What a phenomenal gift to the fans. Nice to break that 50+ year barrier! :)
 
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Decker: "So it's okay to torture and maim Vulcans in video games but not humans?"

Spock: "That would explain why Dr. McCoy is late for his shift."
 
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Spock: I thought we wouldn't have to put up with all this "jerking around" on the bridge once we got rid of Kirk.


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Spock: Commadore, rubbing "it" will not make a Genie appear and grant you three wishes.

Palmer: If I rub "it" will "it" grant me a promotion?
 
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Spock: "Commodore, security is here to escort you to the brig."

Decker: "Why is that?"

Spock: "It is obvious you flunked 'How to Look Awesome Under Any Circumstances' during your tenure at the Academy. If Captain Kirk were in your place, his uniform shirt would be ripped to shreds, but otherwise not so much as a hair would be out of place."
 
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Commodore: "Is he there again?"
Spock: "Yes."
Commodore: "My son from the future?"
Spock: "Yes."
Commodore: "In that crotch revealing skin-tight getup?"
Spock: "Yes."
Commodore: "I just can't look... I can't."
 
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Spock (whispering): "Sir, she's right behind you. And yes, 'Doomsday Machine' is most apt terminology."

Decker (whispering): "Really? A maw that could swallow a dozen...?"

Spock (whispering): "Yes."

<brief pause>

Spock (still whispering): "Lt. Dyson is very humble, but she's as brilliant as her great-great-grandfather. Her new stellar-powered vacuum cleaner has a maw that could swallow a dozen dust bunnies before you finish hitting the 'on' switch. I hear the company is rolling out 'Let today be doomsday for your dirt' as their new vision statement. Indeed."
 
poker1.jpg


Spock (whispering): "Sir, she's right behind you. And yes, 'Doomsday Machine' is most apt terminology."

Decker (whispering): "Really? A maw that could swallow a dozen...?"

Spock (whispering): "Yes."

<brief pause>

Spock (still whispering): "Lt. Dyson is very humble, but she's as brilliant as her great-great-grandfather. Her new stellar-powered vacuum cleaner has a maw that could swallow a dozen dust bunnies before you finish hitting the 'on' switch. I hear the company is rolling out 'Let today be doomsday for your dirt' as their new vision statement. Indeed."
Decker (whispering) : I love a woman who knows about...[starts using a bad british accent]...the proper amount of suction.
 
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Spock: "Rat Boy has an announcement tomorrow."

Decker: "An announcement, what is it?"

Spock: "It's a statement informing others of important news, but that's not important right now."
 
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KIRK: Relax Galia, That Pointy-eared bastard won't catch us....

SPOCK: Ahem.

KIRK: He's right behind me, isn't he?
 
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Spock: Captain...

Kirk: Duuuuuuuuude! You need a breath mint!


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Kirk: Fire one!

[leans and farts]

Spock: Fascinating. It doesn't matter which version of you you are a you're still a childish asshole.
 
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