TOS Caption Contest #195: Hands and Jobs

[Isis]

Kirk (thinking) : "I know this stuff is poisonous to Humans, but after listening to Sarek for two hours- I'm gonna drink it."

Spock (OS, thinking): "I wish Father would give it a rest. He's beginning to sound like that guy on $#*! My Dad Says."

 

[Nerys Myk]

No matter how long Sarek prattled on about progressive political concepts, Kirk still refused to drink the kool-aid.

Besides, prattling on was his job!!!!!

 

[Isis]

Kirk (to self): "If I didn't know better, I'd think the two guys behind me were too lazy to get dressed this morning and just threw on some blankets."

 

[Isis]

Sarek bored the other delegates with his umpteenth rendition of Here's the Church, and Here's the Steeple.

 

[Isis]

Kirk (to self): "That chick in the miniskirt next to the guys in blankets--I wonder what she's doing tonight."

 

[Isis]

Kirk (OS): "Mister Sulu, I thought you said the Sharp Quattron would improve our color reception."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Kirk regretted appearing in Sarek's PSA about the dangers of drinking.

 

[Isis]

Thing: "Mr. and Mrs. Addams asked me to take the children trick or treating. Does this costume make me look fat?"

 

[Isis]

The Abrams reboot of "For the World Is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky" was not well received.

 

[Gary7]

Sulu: "And so we've added a fourth color--yellow..."
Spock: (OS) "But Mr. Sulu, that giant hand about to crush our vessel should be green."
Sulu: "Oh my!"

 

[Gary7]

Spock: "... and I'll also have a tofu burger, but it must be at least 2cm thick."
Vic Tayback: "Is that in the script? What the hell am I, a short order cook?"

 

[jep]

Kirk: "Have you tried the punch? It's great."

Sarek: "I have to make an admission. I favor your Earth whiskey."

Tellerite (OS): "YOU FAVOR ADMISSION!!???"

Kirk: "Settle down pig-boy... we're talking about whiskey."



.

 

[M'Sharak]

SPOCKO: You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave
in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff.

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: There's a pubic hair in this.

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: Damn Mamosian telekinetic wine! I can never get it to work right.

Sarek: That is not Mamosian telekinetic wine you bumbling asshat. It is Boone's Farm Fiesta Strawberry.

Kirk: Oh. [chugs glass]

 

[Vassa]

Kirk: It's holding on pretty tight. Probably frozen. Sulu, dip a little lower in the atmosphere this time. Maybe that will shake it loose from the camera.

 

[Gary7]

Sulu: "Sir, those pesky Orion window washers are at it again.
Kirk: "Look at that dirty rag--they're gonna mess up our view, dammit. Evasive maneuvers!"

 

[milo bloom]

Thanks for the win, though I felt guilty about jumping on the "Chekov pissing of Khan" bandwagon.

Kirk: There's a pubic hair in this.

Kirk, cont'd: "and I specifically asked for three!"

 

[WendyNotsid]

Kirk: God Damn, I hope that giant dude shaped like a jug doesn't show up and break through the walls.

OS: OH YEAH!

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: What the?

Spock: It's a distraction!

Ship shakes

Scotty: Another hand has got the aft of the ship!

Kirk: Worst Grab ass ever.

Sarek: So, due to complications from the surgery, for the next several months I will be subject to random bleeding from my fingers and toes.

Kirk: I really wish you would have mentioned that after I had this drink.

Spock: This is how big your brain is.