V'ger is coming

[Edinburgh]

ALIENS have hijacked a NASA probe and are using it to try to contact Earth, experts believe.

Unmanned craft Voyager 2 has sent “distorted” messages home from deepest space.

The probe was launched 33 years ago in a bid to contact extraterrestrial life – and UFO boffins now believe it may have found some.German expert Hartwig Hausdorf claims the strange signals could be alien transmissions.

The craft was launched alongside sister probe Voyager 1 in 1977. Its cargo included what NASA described as a “gold-plated, copper gramophone record” full of songs and greetings in 55 languages. But on April 22 this year the craft briefly stopped transmitting, then began sending gobbledygook.

NASA engineers reckon the glitch is a data transmission fault which they can repair. But Mr Hausdor, author of a book called UFOs – The Are Still Flying, said: “It seems someone has reprogrammed or hijacked the probe.”

Voyager 2 is now at the edge of our solar system, having travelled further than any other spaceship.

A NASA insider said: “This is probably just a faulty machine spouting gibberish.

“But the idea it could have been found by intelligent life has excited people. If true, it could change the world in an instant.”

 

[Deckerd]

But Mr Hausdor, author of a book called UFOs – The Are Still Flying, said: “It seems someone has reprogrammed or hijacked the probe.”

"It seems" presumably translates as "wouldn't it be really, really cool if".

 

[Admiral Buzzkill]

Hartwig Hausdorf is not a "researcher" in any sense that matters. He's a UFO loon, nothing more.

 

[Doug Otte]

Edinburgh, don't forget to cite your source. Thanks.
Doug

 

[I Grok Spock]

Edinburgh, don't forget to cite your source. Thanks.
Doug

Hope this helps.

 

[Noname Given]

Edinburgh, don't forget to cite your source. Thanks.
Doug

Hope this helps.

What? No Batboy headline stories from the Weekly World New anymore - I'm shocked.

 

[MajRichter]

Edinburgh, don't forget to cite your source. Thanks.
Doug

Hope this helps.

What? No Batboy headline stories from the Weekly World New anymore - I'm shocked.

Either Batboy or "Aliens Empregnated Me!". Those are classic WWN headlines.

 

[Vonstadt]

Yeah Mr. Hausdorf aliens had to have hijacked the probe, could never just be a technical glitch when NASA probes are concerned

 

[Cornholio]

I said it before and I'll say it again - it's those damn bugs from Klendathu.

either them or it merged with Tan Ru.

we're definitely screwed now.

 

[Hober Mallow]

I'm willing to bet Richard Hoaglan's Martian face is involved somehow.

 

[StarryEyed]

But Mr Hausdor, author of a book called UFOs – The Are Still Flying, said: “It seems someone has reprogrammed or hijacked the probe.”

"It seems" presumably translates as "wouldn't it be really, really cool if".

Exactly. It's a shame people feel the need to grasp at straws like this because the real world is really interesting. Unfortunately, paradigm-changing discoveries come at a snails pace, just a few in a person's lifetime. People are impatient so we end up with super market tabloids showing pictures of aliens dining with the President at the White House.

 

[Kolrad]

I still think it's amazing that within my lifetime, we have gone from having no ability to detect planets orbiting other stars to discovering them so often that hardly anyone pays attention.

 

[T'Girl]

The probe was launched 33 years ago in a bid to contact extraterrestrial life

Not exactly why it was launched.

 

[Hober Mallow]

The probe was launched 33 years ago in a bid to contact extraterrestrial life

Not exactly why it was launched.

Oh, so you actually believed the official story?

 

[StarryEyed]

I still think it's amazing that within my lifetime, we have gone from having no ability to detect planets orbiting other stars to discovering them so often that hardly anyone pays attention.

Most people don't even know about that! It's a wonder the conspiracy nut jobs have not yet announced that we have discovered the planet of the Greys.

 

[Hober Mallow]

ALIENS have hijacked a NASA probe and are using it to try to contact Earth, experts believe.

I like how the headline just flat-out lies about what the article actually says.

 

[Admiral Shran]

But Mr Hausdor, author of a book called UFOs – The Are Still Flying, said: “It seems someone has reprogrammed or hijacked the probe.”

"It seems" presumably translates as "wouldn't it be really, really cool if".

Exactly. It's a shame people feel the need to grasp at straws like this because the real world is really interesting. Unfortunately, paradigm-changing discoveries come at a snails pace, just a few in a person's lifetime. People are impatient so we end up with super market tabloids showing pictures of aliens dining with the President at the White House.

You mean they haven't been dining with Obama?! I've been lied to!

 

[Hober Mallow]

You mean they haven't been dining with Obama?! I've been lied to!

The aliens are Republican.

At least, they were, before Arizona started cracking down on them.

 

[ahkyahnan]

So aliens travel clear across the galaxy to the edge of our solar system, and then stop? They couldn't make that last little leg of the trip and had to steal a probe to send us a message?

That's kinda like Columbus sailing all the way to Long Island, and then sending smoke signals to the mainland.

Mark

 

[Noname Given]

I still think it's amazing that within my lifetime, we have gone from having no ability to detect planets orbiting other stars to discovering them so often that hardly anyone pays attention.

Most people don't even know about that! It's a wonder the conspiracy nut jobs have not yet announced that we have discovered the planet of the Greys.

They don't need to - didn't you know, the MOON is hollow and has been the main base of the Greys for millenia - try to keep up.