Oh! I forgot! I DO have a decent present for you all...a story...
.AIRSICK ELF
Irwin Elf was hiding in an empty reindeer stall. The toys were made and wrapped, and it was his turn to go with Santa on his trip around the world. Irwin loved Christmas, but just the thought of being in the sleigh so high above the ground, flying around all night made him turn greener than a lit-up tree.
It wasn't like he could tell anyone, either. How humiliating THAT would be! So he hid in the stable and hoped no one would find him. Fat chance, with Rudolf around.
Suddenly a bright red nose poked it's way into the darkness as this very special reindeer spotted the missing elf. Irwin sighed.
"Tattletail", he muttered.
A moment later, the head elf, who just happened to be Irwin's father, bustled in, surprise written all over his face.
" Irwin! We've been looking all over for you! The sleigh is packed, and Santa is ready to take off. What are you doing in here, anyway?"
" I...I was tired; I guess I just fell asleep..." the young elf lied and yawned for good measure.
" Well, wake up and hurry along. It's time to go. "
Irwin dusted off his green suit and followed his father, fervently hoping he wouldn't disgrace himself by puking in Santa's lap.
The fat man's jolly laugh could be heard before they even reached the sleigh.
" HO! HO! HO! Let's get moving, Irwin. I nearly left without you! " He was already in the sleigh; Irwin's father settled his son in beside him.
" Remember to keep that hat and scarf on, Irwin, it's cold out there. And stay under the blanket. Is your seat belt fastened? "
Irwin tried not to give his father a disgusted look, Rudolf bounded to the head of the trace, and Santa began his..." On Donner! On Blitzen!" speech.
They were off, and nobody noticed the little elf turning pale as he closed his eyes tight and hung on for dear life.
They were high above the clouds when Santa noticed how silent his helper was.
" Why so quiet, Irwin? Come now, help me stay awake; it's going to be a long night, you know; I certainly can't go falling asleep at the reins. Anyone would think you hadn't wanted to come...HO! HO! HO! "
Irwin opened one eye, and immediately regretted it. He grabbed the edge of his seat as he grew dizzy, and, when he tried to say something cheerful, a moan emerged instead.
Santa took a closer look at him.
" What in the world is wrong with you? You look especially green tonight. You didn't get into the mulled wine, did you? "
Irwin shook his head and wished he hadn't. It made the nausea worse. He was going to have to tell. He took a deep breath.
" No sir..." he managed to say. "I..I mean..."
" Well, HO! HO! HO! Out with it, Elf! " Santa's belly shook like a bowlful of jelly, and Irwin nearly lost his supper.
" sick..." he whispered.
Santa nearly fell out of the sleigh.
" Sick? On Christmas? Elves don't get sick...and especially not on Christmas!" he exclaimed.
" no..." Irwin stumbled over the words. " airsick...can't stand heights..." He was so embarrassed, he hid his head in his hands.
" HO! HO! HO! " Somehow, Santa's laughter made it worse.
" Why didn't you say so? " Reaching into a pocket, he pulled out a candy cane.
" Didn't you know most elves think they'll be sick their first time out? One of these should fix that in a hurry. Here...suck on that and see if you don't feel better."
Irwin didn't see how a bit of candy was going to help, but he did as he was told. Santa took the sleigh in a slingshot around the sun in order to make time last, and Irwin was so dizzy, he had no time to be sick.
The night seemed to pass quickly. Irwin was so busy, he'd forgotten about being airsick, and, ever so often, Santa would hand him another candy cane.
" HO! HO! HO! Well, Irwin, this is our last stop, and none too soon, either. The sun is about to rise."
They delivered the toys and were on their way home.
" And how do you feel now, Irwin? " asked Santa.
Irwin looked at him in surprise. " I feel fine, Santa! Ummm...you won't tell my father about..."
" HO! HO! HO! Your secret's safe with me. I'll never tell! "
They made it back to the North Pole just about dawn, and no one ever learned Irwin's secret.