TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Can't.

[Shatmandu]

Hiya, folks.

Another week, another mention of someone shooting liquid out their nose while viewing. I know we're doing something right when I see those.

We've got an Uhura's-skirtload of winners, because of the cereal box, including a first time winner, a hoop of Spock Awards for double wins, and one DOUBLE Spock Award to keep a streak going.

The best of the best this week were:

Kirk: "Hey Chekov, when you do the Vulcan salute, do you make a W with your fingers?"
Chekov: "Wuck you, Captain sir!"

Kirk: "If you want to win Rand over Charlie, you're going to have to find a better technique than to squeeze her butt cheeks and jerk off."

"Theeeeeey're Logical!"

Kirk: “Yeah, Spock may know how to ‘choke a bitch’ but my ‘sex-face’ beats that all to hell!”

Kirk: Damn your hand is cold Ass Rubbing McCoy!

McCoy: This is why I hate house calls.

Kirk: "Charlie, do you like movies about gladiators?"
Charlie: "Well... I... uh... I mean..."
Kirk: "Have you ever seen a grown man naked?"

And the cereal isle in the grocery store of Hell itself would contain:

(I included my own, but I'm not claiming a win.)

(A win to scottydog for the assist ^^)

Hilarious work, folks. Very nicely done.

This week's screencaps are from The Squire of Gothos. I'm not sure why, but I don't recall us using many shots from that episode for some reason. As I flipped through, I found several suitable ones that'll be showing up hither and yon.

Here you go:

And I couldn't decide between two oddballs, so here they both are:

Lets spray some monitors ...

Joe, toweled



TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

26138 (3x)
A beaker full of death (4x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
Alrik (3x) *** BIG WINNER! ***
Alyssa (3x)
ancient
Atavachron (2x)
Bad Atom (2x)
Battrekker
brian
Cakes488
CaptainJon
captain crow (16x)

*** SEVENTH SPOCK AWARD IN A ROW! TWO THIS ROUND! HE LIVES IN MY BRAIN!***
Captain Kate (2x)
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (23x)
Corallis
cultcross
Cuhl
DeafPoet
Defcon (2x)
Deranged Nastat (2x)
Diesel Micky Dolenz (12x)
Dohlman
DrBob (14x)
DS9Sega (7x)
EliyahuQeoni (3x)
EnsignHarper (2X)
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gary7 (2x)
GeorgeKirk *** FIRST TIME BIG WINNER! WELCOME TO ETERNITY! ***
Gertch (28x)
goldbug (3x)
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone (3x)
highlander (12x)
Isis (2X)
Jackson_Roykirk
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
jep (2x) *** BIG WINNER SECOND WEEK IN A ROW! ***
Jeri
Johnnyracefan (2x)
John_Picard (4x)
Jonas Grumby (4x)
jptrekker (4x)
Kahloke (4x)
Kegek (2x)
Kirby (2x)
KJM
Mallory (4x)
MGagen
middyseafort (10x)
Milo Bloom (2x)
Mistral (3x)
Mojochi
Mr. Adventure
Mysterion (2x) *** BIG WINNER! ***
M'Sharak (14x)
NCC-1701 (7x)
Nebusj
Nerys Myk (47x!) *** BIG WINNER THIRD WEEK IN A ROW! ***
Noname Given (2x)
NTRPRZ
Outpost4 (16x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (49!x) *** BIG WINNER, SECOND WEEK IN A ROW! ***
Redfern (2x)
SciFi75 (5x)
scottydog (30x)

*** BIG WINNER, SECOND WEEK IN A ROW!***
Sector 7
seigezunt (7x)

*** BIG WINNER, SECOND WEEK IN A ROW!***
Shatmandu (25x)
Shaw (5x) *** BIG WINNER! ***
shivkala
Sir Rhosis (2x)
S'Kai
Sovay
SRFX
ssosmcin
Super Grover
Tallis Rhul
Tan Ru (2x)
T'Bonz (8x)
T'Girl (2x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
the 4th hanson bro (4x)
TheGallifreyanSith
The Badger (4x)
The Castellan
The Cutest of Borg (2x)
The Laughing Vulcan (23x) *** BIG WINNER! ***
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (12x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness (2x)
Tim M (3x)
Toban Kal
Tribble (9x)
Triskelion (35x)

*** TRIPLE BIG WINNER! AND HE HAS WINS FOUR WEEKS RUNNING! ***
Tristan
Turbo (2x)
UssGlenn (2x)
Volphone_the_Fox (3x) *** BIG WINNER! ***
vassa
Ward Fowler (4x)
Woulfe (4x)
Yeoman Randi (2x)
Zachery Smith

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Squire: "Fetch me my chamberpot, swain."

McCoy: "The Captain is being held completely still. Sulu just can't act."

Kirk: "What's Spock doing with that muskrat? SWEETMOTHEROFSHIT!"

Kirk: "If I could butt-punch, your ass would be grass."

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

McCoy was all about throwing the money to the Table dancers

Kirk; watching the skinny dipping yeomen Wap, wap wap........


Nuts almost 1st post...

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

McCoy: "We're from out of town. You beautiful ladies like to join us?"

 

[Captain Crow]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Thanks for the wins Shatmandu.

Kirk: I don't give a shit that your an omnipotent being! I want your Mr. Humphries ass off my ship now!

McCoy: So how long have the been doing the "Robot" for?

Blue Shirt: About four hours. That's why I called you.

Kirk: Very interesting... but stupid.

 

[Isis]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Unfortunately, the performance was marred by Kirk and Sulu's accidental switching of uniform tops.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

MCCOY: Its like something out of House of Wax.

JAEGER: That crappy movie with Paris Hilton?

MCCOY: Nah, the good one with Vincent Price.

 

[UssGlenn]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Squire: "I see you have set alert condition to fuchsia."

McCoy: "They appear to have karate-chop action"

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Trelane: "Mark my word, pajama boy! Sooner or later, sartorial style shall make a comeback!"

McCoy: "It's Acute Orion Poontangitis. It's caused by overindulging in...well, you can probably guess."

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

 

[Nerys Myk]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

TRELANE: You've been warned, Captain. I can't be held responsible for what follows!

 

[Mysterion]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Thanks for the win!

Roddenberry (off-screen): Look, if this doesn't work out, we can always try the character again. Say twenty years or so from now...I mean in 1987, who's gonna remember this? Right?

 

[Alrik]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

A WIN! Thanks Shatmandu!

Trelane: "I wish my brother George was here."

 

[Alrik]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

McCoy: "It's Acute Orion Poontangitis. It's caused by overindulging in...well, you can probably guess."

Gold Shirt: "The Captain, sure. But how do you explain Sulu?"

McCoy: "A ruffie and double dose of Viagra. Poor queen never stood a chance."

 

[Alrik]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

McCoy (OS): "Do you have ta view everything through a crotch Jim?"

Kirk: "Old habits Bones. Old habits."

 

[Alrik]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Trelane: "So I took a little liberty with you alert status. At least I'm fully out...unlike that little bitch Q."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Trelane: "Are you mocking me, Kirk?"
Kirk: "Nothing to do with you, talk to the helmsman."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Hey! I won. That gets me in the warm and fuzzies.

"Stand and deliver, your money or your life!"

McCoy: "Sulu twitched, I'm sure of it."
Kirk: "Ha! I knew it. I win."
McCoy: "Actually you lose, I was just faking you out."

Shatner: "I can't hold this pose forever. Where's my stand in?"
Director: "Hey, someone get that Beltran kid up here on the double."

Kirkmer Fudd: "Be vewwy quiet. I'm hunting pussy."

Shatner: "I can't believe I have to do this stunt myself. Now where's that Beltran kid?"
Director: "You're hanging off him."

 

[Gertch]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Trelane: "I'm here for the one named Sulu."
Sulu: "Oh my."

Trelane: "When I catch you Captain I'll show you who is knottier than that tree."

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: TOS Caption Contest #155: Think Of Any Squire of Gothos Puns? I Ca

Trelane: "You're not all flaming homosexuals? I just watched Napoleon conquer a dozen rent boys ..."