Do You Expect To Be More Successful Than Your Parents?
- Thread starter Kestra
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I doubt I'll ever be more successful than them professionally - my dad got his degree from Cambridge and then served in the RAF and my mum was a secretary for NATO and the WHO before she got married.
But I do hope to be more successful than them as far as family is concerned, they divorced when I was seven and, well, let's just say I have a few issues that are attibutable to their parenting. Compared to some of the stories I've read here, they certainly weren't bad parents, but I hope to raise my kids with less hang-ups
But I do hope to be more successful than them as far as family is concerned, they divorced when I was seven and, well, let's just say I have a few issues that are attibutable to their parenting. Compared to some of the stories I've read here, they certainly weren't bad parents, but I hope to raise my kids with less hang-ups
I think it's safe to say that every generation always wishes the best (or at least something better) for the next generation. Take immigrants, for example. Trying to get established in the U.S.--especially with little or no help from friends or distant relatives--can be quite a challenge, and that is often the case for a lot of newcomers. When foreigners come to the U.S., many often work blue-collar jobs, and every member of the household tries to pitch in and contribute to the overall income as well as spending. Over the course of time, with a lot of hard work (and sometimes luck), immigrants get to live the American dream. Their native-born children get to go to college, buy a house, and succeed in their chosen professions.
Although I can only speak for myself, I don't really try to "compete" with my parents. I would just say that I probably "have more" today and enjoy the luxuries of modern living than they did when they were my age. Any parent would want only the best for their children. As for success, one of my favorite quotes is from Elbert Hubbard: "He has achieved success who has worked well, laughed often, and loved much."
Although I can only speak for myself, I don't really try to "compete" with my parents. I would just say that I probably "have more" today and enjoy the luxuries of modern living than they did when they were my age. Any parent would want only the best for their children. As for success, one of my favorite quotes is from Elbert Hubbard: "He has achieved success who has worked well, laughed often, and loved much."
I am no more successful than my parents. I think the only thing I've done that they didn't is go on to higher education. Monetarily, professionally I have done no better. In fact it could be argued that I have not done as well since my father owned his own business and my mother did not work outside the home. My husband and I need two incomes to keep our lifestyle going.
I compare myself to my parents when they were my age, and this is what I see:
Financially, I do not expect to ever be as successful as my parents. My dad got a good idea and found himself in the right place/right time and as a result my parents denied themselves nothing until dad died.
Me? I make 1/3 of what my parents did in 1981. That's raw dollars, not adjusted for inflation.
In other avenues, I am more successful. Unlike my dad, for instance, I graduated college, I never used illicit drugs, I've never been arrested, I didn't get knocked up/knock someone up in high school, I didn't turn 27 years old with two failed marriages, a third that was on its way to failing, and a court order to stay away from my two young, angry children. My dad, for all his financial success, cannot say the same for any of those. Thank god that by the time I came along he had mostly snapped out of it. I'm told that when he was younger he was an insufferable asshole, but by the time I was born he had reformed into an extremely charming and likeable asshole lol.
My mom had no failed marriages but she did do the teen pregnancy and drug use thing, and pretty much stumbled aimlessly through her young adulthood until she met my (significantly older) dad and let him support her financially and run her life for her. To her credit though, she did run her own manicure shop in her mid-twenties, before she sold it to raise my sister and I. I'm yet to discover the entrepreneurial acumen to own my own business. So for that she definitely trumps me.
So on those counts, I'm mostly more successful than the both of them so far. Hope it sticks.
Financially, I do not expect to ever be as successful as my parents. My dad got a good idea and found himself in the right place/right time and as a result my parents denied themselves nothing until dad died.
Me? I make 1/3 of what my parents did in 1981. That's raw dollars, not adjusted for inflation.
In other avenues, I am more successful. Unlike my dad, for instance, I graduated college, I never used illicit drugs, I've never been arrested, I didn't get knocked up/knock someone up in high school, I didn't turn 27 years old with two failed marriages, a third that was on its way to failing, and a court order to stay away from my two young, angry children. My dad, for all his financial success, cannot say the same for any of those. Thank god that by the time I came along he had mostly snapped out of it. I'm told that when he was younger he was an insufferable asshole, but by the time I was born he had reformed into an extremely charming and likeable asshole lol.
My mom had no failed marriages but she did do the teen pregnancy and drug use thing, and pretty much stumbled aimlessly through her young adulthood until she met my (significantly older) dad and let him support her financially and run her life for her. To her credit though, she did run her own manicure shop in her mid-twenties, before she sold it to raise my sister and I. I'm yet to discover the entrepreneurial acumen to own my own business. So for that she definitely trumps me.
So on those counts, I'm mostly more successful than the both of them so far. Hope it sticks.
As far as education is concerned, probably not since my dad got his JD and my mom got her masters and I really dont feel compelled to do so. Professionaly our fields are so different that I can't really compare one to the other. As far as family is concerned, I can only hope I am as good as they are; they're great parents
Yes and no.
I'll probably end up doing better in a salary sense, simply because my parents are both primary school teachers, and there is shockingly little career progression available to you in that profession. My job, however, has quite a few opportunities that I can hopefully take advantage of over the next few years.
That something I've never thought about...
In terms of education I have them beat hands down. Which doesn't amount to much as they are both more financially secure. I've also had a broader range of experiences and my father likes to stroke my ego and tell me I'm a better writer (which I don't find to be true - one look at my site will tell you that)...
In terms of following my passions I'm more successful, I've done almost everything I've aspired to do and I'm half their age, but outside of that I've less to be proud of. Though I do intend to be happier and not miss out on opportunities they did. So in a weird kind of way... yes.
In terms of education I have them beat hands down. Which doesn't amount to much as they are both more financially secure. I've also had a broader range of experiences and my father likes to stroke my ego and tell me I'm a better writer (which I don't find to be true - one look at my site will tell you that)...
In terms of following my passions I'm more successful, I've done almost everything I've aspired to do and I'm half their age, but outside of that I've less to be proud of. Though I do intend to be happier and not miss out on opportunities they did. So in a weird kind of way... yes.
I already am. For one thing, I have no kids. 
Also, I make pretty good money, although less than I did a couple of years ago, and I have a small Internet business on the side, a couple of books in print, and I've already saved enough to retire by the time I'm 60. I never got sucked in by religion or booze, so I have peace of mind they never had. I'm far more educated, and I've been more places and done more things than they ever did. So, yes, I consider myself far more successful than they are.
Also, I make pretty good money, although less than I did a couple of years ago, and I have a small Internet business on the side, a couple of books in print, and I've already saved enough to retire by the time I'm 60. I never got sucked in by religion or booze, so I have peace of mind they never had. I'm far more educated, and I've been more places and done more things than they ever did. So, yes, I consider myself far more successful than they are.
Money wise yes. In other way I can only hope. My father is in his mid-fifties, has been unemployed 23 days in his life, raised four children,retired military, church leader, community leader and his my daddy. Mother's a jet engine mechanic, jazz singer, little league coach and owns her fourth hog.
Good question: I thought about it myself.
And the answer is... I don't know. We are hard to compare, professionally and personally. At my age, my parents had a family going, they had good if not fancy jobs (my father was a factory worker at the time, my mother a school teacher) and already had a kid. Me, I'm working as an astrophysicist and I'm finishing my PhD, but I don't own a house, my job is all except financially rewarding, and I have a long-term relationship with no kids. So, take your pick. I guess I have the opportunity to be more successful (professionally, at least), but I also have higher possibility of just crash and burn. I really don't know.
And the answer is... I don't know. We are hard to compare, professionally and personally. At my age, my parents had a family going, they had good if not fancy jobs (my father was a factory worker at the time, my mother a school teacher) and already had a kid. Me, I'm working as an astrophysicist and I'm finishing my PhD, but I don't own a house, my job is all except financially rewarding, and I have a long-term relationship with no kids. So, take your pick. I guess I have the opportunity to be more successful (professionally, at least), but I also have higher possibility of just crash and burn. I really don't know.
Money-wise, I'm already more successful. I am way ahead of my parents in the kid department, though. I have 3--they stopped at 2 (though I have a half-brother who is 19 years younger than me.)
My father was career Air Force and my mother worked various jobs. She didn't have a "career," as such.
By contrast, I've been in the software industry since I was 16, as that was when I first started freelancing. Got a "real" job working at a software company at 20, and here I am, still in that business, with a good resume to back me up.
I think even now, I still make more money than either my father or my stepfather. My stepfather might make more than me, but it wouldn't be by much.
I also went to (but didn't finish) college, which neither of my parents had the chance to do.
My father was career Air Force and my mother worked various jobs. She didn't have a "career," as such.
By contrast, I've been in the software industry since I was 16, as that was when I first started freelancing. Got a "real" job working at a software company at 20, and here I am, still in that business, with a good resume to back me up.
I think even now, I still make more money than either my father or my stepfather. My stepfather might make more than me, but it wouldn't be by much.
I also went to (but didn't finish) college, which neither of my parents had the chance to do.
I expect to be more successful than my mother, who is in council housing and has no career, only small jobs where she can find them. The really sad thing is, she's highly intelligent, motivated to help her community, and people seem to automatically like her, but unless you have competitive ambition and think like everyone else you have no chance. I have no competitive ambition and I don't think like anyone else. Given that I'm at university, and doing well, I assume I'll be more sucessful than she, but to be honest I don't expect to go far. I'm planning on staying at home with the children if possible (though I have little doubt part-time work on top of that will be a financial necessity, no matter how much my wife makes). I'm not interested in "climbing to the top", I only want a reasonable standard of living, a loving family and the opportunity to do something worthwhile for the community.
I already am in terms of the survival of my marriage far beyond theirs and financially. I don't know that I expected this, but since I was college educated and they weren't it doesn't come as a surprise to me.
Professionally, maybe. Too early to say.
Personally and socially, probably not. My mother is one of those people who can strike up conversations with random strangers. I most definitely cannot, and in fact cringing away from that behavior when I was younger may have contributed to my current social underdevelopment.
Personally and socially, probably not. My mother is one of those people who can strike up conversations with random strangers. I most definitely cannot, and in fact cringing away from that behavior when I was younger may have contributed to my current social underdevelopment.
As others have said, it depends on how you define success. Comparing where they were in their lives at my age, I feel like I'm doing comparably well. Both of my parents worked while my wife and I have been able to survive on my salary, allowing her to stay home with the kids while they're young. Without knowing exactly what my parents made in the early 80s and adjusting my current salary for inflation, I can't say for sure.
One area where I do feel like I'm doing somewhat better is in stability. By the time I was 13, I had lived in nine different places in four different towns in three different states as my father changed jobs. I've worked in the same place for almost a decade now, and my kids (barring some unforeseen circumstance) will hopefully spend their entire childhoods without having to worry about moving or being ripped away from their friends.
One area where I do feel like I'm doing somewhat better is in stability. By the time I was 13, I had lived in nine different places in four different towns in three different states as my father changed jobs. I've worked in the same place for almost a decade now, and my kids (barring some unforeseen circumstance) will hopefully spend their entire childhoods without having to worry about moving or being ripped away from their friends.
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