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When does a lie become a fantasy you actually believe in?

K'Ehleyr

Commodore
Commodore
I have lived in my small nest of flats for 15 years and know the neighbours as well as they know me.

We chat at the bins (it's sooo the new water cooler), we know when we go to work, we know who has visitors and if there is a strange car in the car park ~ and I know when the guy upstairs pees.

So when I lost my job and was home, it was noticed. So suddenly I became the 'freelance, proofreader, copy-editor, article writer' working from home.

Oh, how I have complained about wanting a proper job and not being stuck at home all the time.
And when I am caught outside with a book and a glass of beer in the middle of the day "well there's only so much staring at the screen you can take"
How I've excused getting up mid-morning by saying "I'm working for an American company and not getting assignments until noon :rolleyes:"

I'm not just lying to them anymore ~ I'm lying to myself. The next thing you know I will be a secret agent and checking their flats for bugs.

So I kinda feel bad about leading them astray but to be honest I'm too ashamed to say I'm unemployed.
I'm not hurting anyone, it's just I keep forgetting the lies. Note to MI5 ~ would make crap spy :lol:

Anyway I excuse myself with this quote:

"There is no glory in honesty if it is destructive. And no shame in dishonesty if it's goal is to offer grace."

MJ Rose ~ Lying in Bed.


So is anyone else living a lie?
And do you think mine is excusable?
 
I don't exactly call it living a lie, but because I am a Christian pastor, there are a lot of social situations where I dont feel free to "let my hair down" (if you dont understand that American expression, let me know).

I have a small group of close friends where I feel comfortable being myself. But other than that, I spend much of my time "keeping up appearances" and living up the to the perception of what a pastor is supposed to act like.
 
^ You have a very interesting av for a Christian Pastor :vulcan:

But do you feel comfortable 'keeping up appearances'?

I feel I'm deceiving people even though there would be no issue if I told the truth.
 
Fairly quickly in my experience. I had a somewhat similar situation going on in my life at one point.

It taught me two things:

1. Better off not lying.

2. Avoid ever making ANY friendships with neighbors that go beyond a quick nod or wave. Because if you get sick of them, or they turn out to be nuts....there is no getting away from them.

Strangers make good neighbors.

edit: Actually, who gives a crap what they think? This is your home and your life. Stop letting other people make you unhappy. You think they don't have their share of dirty little secrets?
 
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The lie is that we are not animals & not driven by animal passion & reaction. The Vulcan way is a better way than ours, unless you want to horizontal mambo really often without killing your captain.:guffaw:
 
It must be difficult to live in such a close-knit community. A little anonymity can be very freeing. :D

Although there's nowhere to turn when you run out of salt... :p
 
Thanks all for enlightening replies, that will teach me to start a thread at 4am :lol:
On reflection I have decided to go with the turnip and not the rhubarb ~ sorted :techman:
 
Fairly quickly in my experience. I had a somewhat similar situation going on in my life at one point.

It taught me two things:

1. Better off not lying.

2. Avoid ever making ANY friendships with neighbors that go beyond a quick nod or wave. Because if you get sick of them, or they turn out to be nuts....there is no getting away from them.

Strangers make good neighbors.

edit: Actually, who gives a crap what they think? This is your home and your life. Stop letting other people make you unhappy. You think they don't have their share of dirty little secrets?

Just re-read your last bit destro and you're absolutely right ~ why should I feel I have to explain myself. Sod 'em, sod 'em all - until as Officer says I run out of salt:lol:
 
I don't exactly call it living a lie, but because I am a Christian pastor, there are a lot of social situations where I dont feel free to "let my hair down" (if you dont understand that American expression, let me know).

I have a small group of close friends where I feel comfortable being myself. But other than that, I spend much of my time "keeping up appearances" and living up the to the perception of what a pastor is supposed to act like.

I'm so glad you're comfortable enough to not keep up appearances here, hence your cutting edge avatar. I'm curious to know what other "appearances" go astray when you're with this group of close friends. What do they allow you to do/be when you are with them?
 
Thanks all for enlightening replies, that will teach me to start a thread at 4am :lol:
On reflection I have decided to go with the turnip and not the rhubarb ~ sorted :techman:

Hey as long as you can ask yourself the question, you're okay. It's when you stop asking the question (ie get comfortable in your situation and don't want to change/improve it) that you have a problem.

Which is true for 99% of things in life.
 
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