Mind-blowing solutions

[Plecostomus]

Ok. I'm working part-time in a print-shop because Job Is Job has slowed down quite a bit.

Print shop does silk-screening and pad-printing... I deal with the pad-printers.


Basically we split an image into it's color components and apply the image to the product one stroke per color at a time.

In between strokes the product can't move AT ALL. If it does horrible image related fail occurs.

We got a job from the Big Red X across time (as opposed to the Yellow K), it's a "simple" three color job, the white part says MEDIA EXPANSION PORT, then there is a funky three-color USB logo and of course the trademark Big Red X.

Problem was the part was shifting causing the USB logo to look like pure condensed fail. My task was to redesign the fixture

Using my machinist fu I milled a block of aluminum into shape so it formed a nest to hold the part, then I drilled out the bottom and pressed in two $20 Super Magnets. As I predicted the magnetic force held the part in the nest without shifting. HOORAY.

Enter the Boss. He looks at the fixture, looks at me printing and wants to know how I did it. He comes over and plays with it (the fixture not me) and declares "How the FUCK did you magneticfy (his word) aluminum, that ain't possible!"

I told him it was a special heat treating procedure, he didn't buy it. Then I tried the "well it's actually an old Army trick" but he didn't buy that.

Haven't told him yet. The fact that he can't figure it out is a riot.



So, share your "mind blowing" solutions to problems here.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

As a programmer, most of my "mind-blowing" solutions involve discovering undocumented features in our database platform, or actually reading the documentation to find out how to do something that everyone else just assumed was impossible.

I've actually had this conversation:

Coworker: "Whoa, what's that?" *points at code*

Me: "That's a function that turns on end-of-file checking."

Coworker: "I've never seen that before. We always had to do all this crazy error-handling when we got an end-of-file exception..."

Me: "Yeah, well, now you don't. Just use this and check the status of $ZEOF after each read."

Coworker: "Where did you find this? We've wanted something like this for years!"

Me: "Um, in the documentation."

Coworker: "...oh."

 

[Plecostomus]

Always RTFM.

The sheetmetal company I rode into the ground had a multi-million dollar Warcom press brake for bending metal. The person I replaced always used it as a "standard" brake for bending, so did the owner.

Absoultly blew the owner's mind when I started using the advanced features like the "3-D back guage" and "tool preset progamming" and stuff like that.

To use it as a simple press bender is a crime it's like buying a R-R Silver Ghost just so you can shit in the front seat.

That's part of the reason they collapsed, he had all this advanced machinery that could do so much more.. he paid premium prices yet barely scratched the surface in terms of what they could do with it, and that limited his ability to make payments.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Yeah, you see this kind of "work harder, not smarter" mindset in parts of the software world, too. People would rather reinvent the wheel or do things the hard way than do a little research and figure out if there's a way to do it better or more fully take advantage of the tools at their disposal. It boggles my mind. I'm fundamentally lazy--anything that will take some of the work out of it for me, I'm all for!

 

[Plecostomus]

There is a "traditional" mindset in this area that is very hard to get around. Just because that's the way you were taught by Kodak 30 years ago doesn't mean it's the ONLY way. Things have changed over the last few decades, what once was "hard work" can be simplified and done faster-cheaper-better by new methods and machines.


Frankly it blows my mind to walk into a shop see a 6-axis CNC machine being used as a jig-bore (fancy drillpress) because the senior-most programmer can't be assed to learn how to program it 'cause "that ain't the way we used to do it."

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I sometimes wonder if the "strong work ethic" older workers are praised for is actually their tendency to remain stuck in a rut of rote, repetitive work.

The people around me work their asses off, but I've seen what their work consists of. They spend most of their time running against brick walls because they never took the time to learn how to do it faster, better, and cheaper.

 

[TheBrew]

Yeah, if I am stuck, I always look at the manual or do a google search. The reason why I am so good at IT work is that I actually do the research for solutions instead of just staring at the problem dumbly.

 

[Plecostomus]

I sometimes wonder if the "strong work ethic" older workers are praised for is actually their tendency to remain stuck in a rut of rote, repetitive work.

What made the Borg such frightening villains (at first) was the ability to change and adapt on the fly to any situation. They could take a problem (getting blasted by the E-D) and adapt to the weapon and prevent future damage.

I don't see alot of that in the business that I work in. It's the More Of The Same Shut Up And Do It The Traditional Way Or GTFH.

Frankly that's what killed The Big Yellow Box and Big Red X here in Rochester, and that mindset has infected most of the small shops that used to feed them as suppliers.

 

[TheBrew]

I hate that! I want to be allowed to accomplish the tasks as I see fit. As long as it is done in a timely manner with excellent results, it shouldn't matter how I did it.

 

[Plecostomus]

Yeah, if I am stuck, I always look at the manual or do a google search. The reason why I am so good at IT work is that I actually do the research for solutions instead of just staring at the problem dumbly.

Exactly! You don't just sit there wondering why you keep having the same issue day in day out, you figure it out and solve the problem.

That's essential in IT, if my network goes down I get cranky and guess who will Feel My Wrath?

 

[SeerSGB]

Theater: Main (re: largest) popper blows the seals on a line that feeds cooking-oil up to the popper. Cue calling freelance repairman that is "cheapest in town", he pokes around for 30 minutes or so and declares that he will have to machine a new fitting and it'll cost a min of $500 plus hours and it was at least a 12 hour job. He leaves, manager is cussing and moaning, I look at the part, say "Hey, can I take a 20, I need a break?" Run up the strip to a Ace hardware buy a $1 stainless steel pipe fitting. Come back rinse it off with sanitizer, pull out my old beat up multitool-- that I had been warned about carrying during work hours-- crawled inside the thing, find a pack of factory spare fitting gaskets in the manual holder, 5 minutes later I radio the manager to come and have a look. Popper is up and running like a new one, no leaks, no pressure loss. I tell the manager and he calls the DM who comes down there, looks at what I did then calls the repairman and tells him they don't need it fixed cause a "fucking usher fixed the thing for a $1 on his damn lunch break."

2 days later, I fixed a projector with the same multi cause the projectionist didn't have a tool kit on hand. He was going to call for a guy to come out of Nashville to swap sprockets off a old junked projector in the corner onto the one that had a bad sprockter. I asked what it took to do it, like 4 screews and some elbow grease, but the machine was out of warranty so it was like a $800 job. I just walked over to the junker pop the parts off myself and swap them out. After that, they got pissed when I wasn't carrying my multitool.

 

[JoeZhang]

I sometimes wonder if the "strong work ethic" older workers are praised for is actually their tendency to remain stuck in a rut of rote, repetitive work.

What made the Borg such frightening villains (at first) was the ability to change and adapt on the fly to any situation. They could take a problem (getting blasted by the E-D) and adapt to the weapon and prevent future damage.

I don't see alot of that in the business that I work in. It's the More Of The Same Shut Up And Do It The Traditional Way Or GTFH.

Frankly that's what killed The Big Yellow Box and Big Red X here in Rochester, and that mindset has infected most of the small shops that used to feed them as suppliers.

It's the same in most organisations, the real short version is this (I charge for the long version) - once a business has been operating for a while, the culture of the organisation tends to become inertia and you recruit "people like us" - anyone who joins who is not like you, you either change or they leave. Eventually the organisation fails or it starts to fail and comes under the ground of individuals who can or will make the changes needed.

 

[Plecostomus]

Theater: Main (re: largest) popper blows the seals on a line that feeds cooking-oil up to the popper. Cue calling freelance repairman that is "cheapest in town", he pokes around for 30 minutes or so and declares that he will have to machine a new fitting and it'll cost a min of $500 plus hours and it was at least a 12 hour job. He leaves, manager is cussing and moaning, I look at the part, say "Hey, can I take a 20, I need a break?" Run up the strip to a Ace hardware buy a $1 stainless steel pipe fitting. Come back rinse it off with sanitizer, pull out my old beat up multitool-- that I had been warned about carrying during work hours-- crawled inside the thing, find a pack of factory spare fitting gaskets in the manual holder, 5 minutes later I radio the manager to come and have a look. Popper is up and running like a new one, no leaks, no pressure loss. I tell the manager and he calls the DM who comes down there, looks at what I did then calls the repairman and tells him they don't need it fixed cause a "fucking usher fixed the thing for a $1 on his damn lunch break."

2 days later, I fixed a projector with the same multi cause the projectionist didn't have a tool kit on hand. He was going to call for a guy to come out of Nashville to swap sprockets off a old junked projector in the corner onto the one that had a bad sprockter. I asked what it took to do it, like 4 screews and some elbow grease, but the machine was out of warranty so it was like a $800 job. I just walked over to the junker pop the parts off myself and swap them out. After that, they got pissed when I wasn't carrying my multitool.

Them sonic screw-drivers come in handy, eh Doctor?

 

[tharpdevenport]

Theater: Main (re: largest) popper blows the seals on a line that feeds cooking-oil up to the popper. Cue calling freelance repairman that is "cheapest in town", he pokes around for 30 minutes or so and declares that he will have to machine a new fitting and it'll cost a min of $500 plus hours and it was at least a 12 hour job. He leaves, manager is cussing and moaning, I look at the part, say "Hey, can I take a 20, I need a break?" Run up the strip to a Ace hardware buy a $1 stainless steel pipe fitting. Come back rinse it off with sanitizer, pull out my old beat up multitool-- that I had been warned about carrying during work hours-- crawled inside the thing, find a pack of factory spare fitting gaskets in the manual holder, 5 minutes later I radio the manager to come and have a look. Popper is up and running like a new one, no leaks, no pressure loss. I tell the manager and he calls the DM who comes down there, looks at what I did then calls the repairman and tells him they don't need it fixed cause a "fucking usher fixed the thing for a $1 on his damn lunch break."

2 days later, I fixed a projector with the same multi cause the projectionist didn't have a tool kit on hand. He was going to call for a guy to come out of Nashville to swap sprockets off a old junked projector in the corner onto the one that had a bad sprockter. I asked what it took to do it, like 4 screews and some elbow grease, but the machine was out of warranty so it was like a $800 job. I just walked over to the junker pop the parts off myself and swap them out. After that, they got pissed when I wasn't carrying my multitool.

After all that I thyink you shuld get a riase. Or at least a $500 dollar Christmas bonus. And they should also have to kneel and kiss your multi tool each time.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I sometimes wonder if the "strong work ethic" older workers are praised for is actually their tendency to remain stuck in a rut of rote, repetitive work.

What made the Borg such frightening villains (at first) was the ability to change and adapt on the fly to any situation. They could take a problem (getting blasted by the E-D) and adapt to the weapon and prevent future damage.

I don't see alot of that in the business that I work in. It's the More Of The Same Shut Up And Do It The Traditional Way Or GTFH.

Frankly that's what killed The Big Yellow Box and Big Red X here in Rochester, and that mindset has infected most of the small shops that used to feed them as suppliers.

It's the same in most organisations, the real short version is this (I charge for the long version) - once a business has been operating for a while, the culture of the organisation tends to become inertia and you recruit "people like us" - anyone who joins who is not like you, you either change or they leave. Eventually the organisation fails or it starts to fail and comes under the ground of individuals who can or will make the changes needed.

I'm one of those people that gets brought in when the organization "starts to fail." The old guard buck up against me and I keep on plodding along, changing what needs changed.

 

[SeerSGB]

Theater: Main (re: largest) popper blows the seals on a line that feeds cooking-oil up to the popper. Cue calling freelance repairman that is "cheapest in town", he pokes around for 30 minutes or so and declares that he will have to machine a new fitting and it'll cost a min of $500 plus hours and it was at least a 12 hour job. He leaves, manager is cussing and moaning, I look at the part, say "Hey, can I take a 20, I need a break?" Run up the strip to a Ace hardware buy a $1 stainless steel pipe fitting. Come back rinse it off with sanitizer, pull out my old beat up multitool-- that I had been warned about carrying during work hours-- crawled inside the thing, find a pack of factory spare fitting gaskets in the manual holder, 5 minutes later I radio the manager to come and have a look. Popper is up and running like a new one, no leaks, no pressure loss. I tell the manager and he calls the DM who comes down there, looks at what I did then calls the repairman and tells him they don't need it fixed cause a "fucking usher fixed the thing for a $1 on his damn lunch break."

2 days later, I fixed a projector with the same multi cause the projectionist didn't have a tool kit on hand. He was going to call for a guy to come out of Nashville to swap sprockets off a old junked projector in the corner onto the one that had a bad sprockter. I asked what it took to do it, like 4 screews and some elbow grease, but the machine was out of warranty so it was like a $800 job. I just walked over to the junker pop the parts off myself and swap them out. After that, they got pissed when I wasn't carrying my multitool.

After all that I thyink you shuld get a riase. Or at least a $500 dollar Christmas bonus. And they should also have to kneel and kiss your multi tool each time.

Left there a few years ago-- man I miss that job some days, for all the hell I went through, it was my favorite. Since I was up for mandatory promotion, I wasn't allowed to transfer to the new theater when the old one shut down with my promotion points intact. I got into a argument with the AM when I got the news; he threw a hissy-fit on the floor (cussing, stomping, screaming over me telling him that if they screw me they could screw themselves), I said fuck it and walked out in the middle of the busiest day of the season.

 

[sojourner]

"Experienced" systems managers taking automatically generated text files, manually editing them for importing to excel, copying said files to home folders of several users, then printing hardcopies of said files. On a daily basis. "It's the procedure we always use".

I come in to the job and after being taught the procedure I say to myself "the hell if I am wasting my time doing that everyday" and take ten minutes writing a DOS BATCHFILE that automates the entire process. How can someone call themselves Systems Managers if they can't do simple scripting?

It also kills me seeing users doing things manually that can be automated by the computers. That's what computers are for .... To automate repetitive labor intensive work.