TNG Caption This #150 - "Contains Mild Holo-peril"

[cultcross]

That's it for another caption contest, time for...

[highlight]THE WINNERS![/highlight]

First up is the award for the first image, which goes to...

Picard: I wish I'd remembered to wear my full dress uniform Data. I look ridiculous.

And for the second,

Riker misunderstood the holoprogram entitled "Crossing Swords in the Smoking Car".

Multi-image award to:

Picard: "I call to order the first meeting of the ancient and mysterious order of...No Rikers."

Riker: "You let in Tom Riker!"

Data: "That is because it is 'No Rikers.' We are allowed to have one."

And photoshop genius special award to:

Well done, guys!


This time's images:

 

[Plecostomus]

RIKER: BLINK ONE MORE TIME MOFUCKER! I DARE YOU!
*off-screen*
TROI: Captain, I think Riker needs a vacation.

PICARD: Invisible subspace chiggers? Don't be daft. Not this early in the series.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Data: "They're coming around for another pass Captain."
Picard: "Raise shields!"
Riker: "Hmmm, press any key to raise shields. Where's the any key? The Any Key! The ANY KEY!"

Picard: "I hed, that gastard Wesree, sukergrued my teeth togevah."

 

[Plecostomus]

WES: "OMG INVISIBLE CELLPHONE!
PICARD: Correct, boy! You were right re-enacting historical LOLcat captions is a blast, Deanna! You do one now, Number One.

PICARD: Riker? Your turn to do a LOLcat.
RIKER: I SAID BLINK MOTHERFUCKER! B L I N K!
TROI: Someone call Dr. Crusher.

 

[Holdfast]

"Captain, no matter how much I stare, I still can't magic-eye them into a control panel with buttons I can actually use."

"You have to go cross-eyed, Number One. Like this."

 

[Rat Boy]

Riker: "Low on disk space? Wait a minute; who's been downloading all this porn?"

Picard: "Uh, yeah...um. I guess you...could delete all that, Number One."

 

[Lt.Cmdr.LaForge]

Ha! Rat Boy's was the best...
Riker: "Low on disk space? Wait a minute; who's been downloading all this porn?"
Picard: "Uh, yeah...um. I guess you...could delete all that, Number One."

=]

 

[Plecostomus]

Ha! Rat Boy's was the best...
Riker: "Low on disk space? Wait a minute; who's been downloading all this porn?"
Picard: "Uh, yeah...um. I guess you...could delete all that, Number One."

=]

Oh we're just getting warmed up my friend! Check back in a couple of days.

RIKER: FUCKER! BLINK ALREADY WILL YA?!
WORF: How long is this going to go on?
CRUSHER: Sedative should take effect any moment now.

 

[Rat Boy]

Computer: "You blinked. I win."

Riker: "Damn, she's good."

 

[Plecostomus]

Computer: "You blinked. I win."

Riker: "Damn, she's good."

Not the ending I had in mind but still worth a hearty

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Ha! Rat Boy's was the best...
Riker: "Low on disk space? Wait a minute; who's been downloading all this porn?"
Picard: "Uh, yeah...um. I guess you...could delete all that, Number One."

=]

I concour

Riker: "Captain there is a message comming in from a 'Lady Heather' , sir you old dog, shes smokin' "

Picard: "Oh great, I had to run into her way out here"

 

[cooleddie74]

"Odd.

According to the computer, the Archer/NX-01 holoprogram can't be run on the current hologrid of the ship because it is...'too damn stupid for words.'

Wonder why it says that?"

First contact with the denizens of the Tick Nebula went quite poorly once the itching spread below the torso.

 

[cooleddie74]

"Captain...come look at this!

The flat, unmoving Okudagram says we're one parsec away from the little yellow dot."

 

[26138]

Ricky Ricardo: Jean-Luc, you got some 'splainin' to do!

 

[cooleddie74]

"Sensors indicate the little white dot is a couple of centimeters from the blue dot...and proceeding away from the yellow dots. Shall I press one of the blue squares? Or wait until Mike comes in and puts on a new transparency?"

"You...you come to me asking fa help...but...but you do you show me respect? Do you show your godcaptain respect?

NO..."

 

[S'kai]

Damn !! Nothing but reruns of Cary Grant movies. I might as well spend the evening in the holodeck with whats-her-face.

 

[M'Sharak]

"Hmm, never noticed that lit up before. What's it--
[reads: "Your fly is open, sir."]
Shit. Wesley, I'll get you for that."

 

[Space Cowboy]

"Captain, it looks like Worf fired the ambassador's gift out the aft torpedo bay at 2300 hours yesterday."

"Eee, I just gathered those tribbles so we could get the broken saw from the prime minister on Altair IV. Now we have to get more tribbles before we can continue on our mission to get the Biggeron torpedoes from the Giant Goron. Damn Klingons..."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Riker: Captain, these lights are blinking out of order.

Picard: Well... get them blinking in order, Number One.

-and-

Picard: Wesley... really my boy, you say, Beverly. Oh.. can you prove it?

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Riker: "Don't blink. Blink and you're dead. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink. Good luck."

(The console blinks, a creepy statue comes in and murders it)

Riker: "Okuuuuuuuudaaaaaaa!!!! You murderer!"

Picard: "Season 1, huh? I'll uhh... be on the shitter. This stuff doesn't write itself, you know."