I'm dating an older woman!

[Trekker4747]

Christmas Day was horrible thanks to my confounded relatives and in particular, yes, guess who, my stinking cousin.

Cousin needs Summer's Eve.

 

[Australis]

the Dicken's play "Scrooged"

Yep, "Scrooged" by the Charlie Dicken.

Ahhh, y'can't beat a good eddication!

 

[Ward Fowler]

We entered into that failed relationship as two consenting adults and both learned things from it (I learned I like more mature women, she learned she likes girls)

You must have made quite an impression.

 

[Trekker4747]

We entered into that failed relationship as two consenting adults and both learned things from it (I learned I like more mature women, she learned she likes girls)

You must have made quite an impression.

I'd say she got the better end of the deal. The universe as a whole, too, is better for it.

 

[sidious618]

I just took a glance in this thread. Please tell me this is some sort of incestual joke?

 

[archeryguy1701]

Nope. That really is his cousin he's talking about, and if you read the first two seasons, you would find that he really did schnoz her repeatedly. And appaently, it was very good. The first two threads were actually fairly entertaining, and while this season started off terribly, it does seem to be rebounding.

 

[Trekker4747]

Check out the first two seasons on DVD!

 

[TorontoTrekker]

 

[sidious618]

I'm almost at the end of season one. I don't know if I've ever laughed so much in my life.

Edit: I have to say that season two wasn't nearly as good. How is this season so far?

 

[Jono]

It will never happen again.

This is a good sign. Whenever MB claims that he will never do something again he usually does it again within a week...only harder.

I'm almost at the end of season one. I don't know if I've ever laughed so much in my life.

Edit: I have to say that season two wasn't nearly as good. How is this season so far?

It's been fairly poor but started to pick up around Halloween when MB inappropriately touched a random kid and lost Chuck due to incompetence.

 

[James Bond]

Edit: I have to say that season two wasn't nearly as good. How is this season so far?

It just got interesting.

 

[D Man]

Edit: I have to say that season two wasn't nearly as good. How is this season so far?

It just got interesting.

Only half interesting though, since he luckily stopped his cousin before "full sex."

 

[Squiggy]

Which, of course, would've lasted all night long.

 

[Scout101]

Don't remember his location, but is he in a part of the world that currently only receives a few minutes of darkness a day?

 

[Crusher Disciple]

Can you get the DVDs from Amazon?

 

[Scout101]

Didn't picture you as the kind of girl with a lot of incest-porn, CD. Interesting

 

[GeorgeKirk]

Can anyone explain why it's bad for the kids to see Cousin and her girlfriend kissing, but it's not bad for them to see their "father figure" get drunk off his ass?

 

[archeryguy1701]

Somehow with MB, I don't think the issue so much is what's happening, but rather who's doing it. I think any other lesbians would be a-okay to do whatever they wanted in front of the kids.

 

[ria 75]

I'm upset that MB's show gets better ratings than "mine."

Trekker, central character in "So... now what?"

You're better off as yourself. Anyway, you'd have to make up chapters. And tone down the no-nonsense. And make spelling mistakes, make up absurdities, and inconsistencies. (Everybody loves to pick up the faults. I mean, those are funny faults. No wonder ratings are high.)

After much lamenting the lack of cousin action, MB is finally giving us what we want. But not until after months of suspense. That's good broadcasting strategy too.
Not to mention it supposedly didn't go all the way so A) we'll keep tuning in for more and B) boyfriend's honour is safe. Convenient.

What did my aunt do for Christmas dinner before she met my mom (remember they only met a couple of years ago when their womanizing father died of a cancer), I wonder?

So does that mean that your mother and aunt are half-sisters? And your cousin is your half-cousin? (Sorry, guys, season 1 is still on my "to read" list.)

My mom's boyfriend who looks like The Undertaker was there too. They've been going out for a year but haven't moved in or got married are anything. They're both in their fifties I think and not getting ANY younger, so what are they waiting for?

To know what the hell they're doing, perhaps, unlike some people.
Anyway, I presume it's only your mother's boyfriend's age you don't know?

When The Undertaker said I look like Tiny Tim I didn't even hit back with an insult at his old bald ass, I just took it.

That would've taken ready wits.

Then my cousin and her girlthing started making out right in front of Chuck and Lisa while they played Wii Sports.
I couldn't believe this shit. My girlfriend and I barely even kissed all day. It's just polite not to do sex stuff in front of old people and children.

Yes, "old people" are so innocent!

They were really rooting around [...] good and ready.

Not bad... Better written than usual.

Chuck cowered inside his parka like Kenny on South Park does when he's scared, the little cutie

That's cute. And one more proof that MadBaggins is the hybrid child of "mom" and a TV set.

"What else haven't you told them, cus?" asked my cousin. And she made a sexy look on her face. "What else?" She was obviously threatening to reveal my relationship with her to everyone.

Well, it's not like she's discreet about her love/sex life, apparently.

I wanted to kick her ass but I couldn't get up because of my leg.

It seems like this broken leg is a tool made to save the stone cold stunner for later.

I calmed down by getting drunk with The Undertaker and ended up playing Karaoke game with him and my aunt. It was surprsingly fun.

Booze is a mood enhancer. Shocker!

I saw my girlfriend laughing and joking with my cousin and her girlthing and I felt jealous. But she was only being socialable so I let it pass.

I'm beginning to see a pattern. You hate it every time "Girlfriend" has any fun not derived from you. You even sound like you see it as something condemnable that you have to be tolerant about! (When you're not just being like an envious child.) What a domestic tyrant you sound like you could become.

She said she knows I still love her and she wants me, because it will end two loving relationships and all she cares about is chaos and she's an agent of chaos (I think she watched The Dark Knight for the first time recently.)

You guys are made for each other. Watch enough shows together and you'll always be in tune. Just avoid "War of the Roses".

Luckily I stopped her before full sex and dragged myself out.

Haem. So you were in, already?

It will never happen again.

NC.
We do need more episodes, you realize?

[...]does your girlfriend have a name, or is she forever stuck as "my girlfriend"?

I suggest "Marge", since MB's introduced the Simpsons. That would be easy to remember for us. After all, I don't find it too hard to imagine MadBaggins growing up into Homer Simpson...

 

[dmcco01]

Sometimes there can be a bit of a generational gap, like when she talks about the eighties and I can't remember them. The most spooky was when she told me she remembers seeing The Return Of The Jedi in the cinema when it first came out. Wow, I suddenly thought she was old then (though she doesn't look much older than 25.) But we laughed and it was fine. I told her I like the Star Wars prequels and she said they sucked and I don't understand because I wasn't "there at the beginning" but she eventually said she liked Watto.

Boy, are you in a LOT of trouble.