I've never been to a witness wedding without fountains of the stuff.
And I've been to a lot of witness weddings in my time.
Alcohol at Weddings - a must? News to me!
- Thread starter hamudm
- Start date
I've never been to a witness wedding without fountains of the stuff.
And I've been to a lot of witness weddings in my time.
Sounds to me as if the comprimise you guys have come up with is perfect.
Even if they bring the drinks down to the reception, you did not provide it.
And it's there for those who want to toast with something more than grape juice.
If anyone gets upset because you didn't spring for booze, they have a problem bigger than your need to deal with.
Congratulations, I klnow it will be wonderful.
Even if they bring the drinks down to the reception, you did not provide it.
And it's there for those who want to toast with something more than grape juice.
If anyone gets upset because you didn't spring for booze, they have a problem bigger than your need to deal with.
Congratulations, I klnow it will be wonderful.
And what exactly is it that you have been reading, pray tell? This statement reeks of presumptuousness.
That said, I think the compromise at which you and the bride-to-be have arrived is fine.
It amazes me how people keep forgetting whose day it is. The bride and groom set the parameters and invite GUESTS to attend to help them celebrate the event. You're not getting married for the guests, they're attending to support YOU.
If the alcohol thing is a big deal, put it on the invitation. "Please note that alcohol will be served in the bar upstairs. There will be no alcohol at the reception."
And if that's a dealbreaker for some of the guests, tough. You're nice enough to invite them, and true friends will support you and celebrate with you regardless.
And enjoy your day. And a big CONGRATULATIONS from me!
--Ted
QFT
if i recall correctly, when my wife and i got married, we didnt have a bar. did people complain? not that i know of. and honestly, i wouldn't care. if they couldnt got a couple hours without drinking to celebrate with my wife and i, we probably shouldnt have invited them...
i was too busy focused on 1. my wife and 2. the "wedding routine" to notice if people were upset about drinking...
i havent heard of stories where a wedding reception falls apart because someone couldnt drink...
I don't see why alcohol should be necessary for people to enjoy themselves. Plus most of the time, the "enjoying themselves" I've seen that involves alcohol is really quite pathetic. If you don't want to put up with that kind of thing at your wedding, you shouldn't have to.
Plecostomus
Commodore
If you NEED alcohol for ANY given situation (wedding, RPG night, football game) then you have a serious problem. I rarely drink, I don't NEED alcohol to be social.
That kind of assumption has cost me friends and acquaintances in the past, but if they were really my friends to begin with they wouldn't have pressured me to drink now would they?
Stick to your guns and don't back down.
That kind of assumption has cost me friends and acquaintances in the past, but if they were really my friends to begin with they wouldn't have pressured me to drink now would they?
Stick to your guns and don't back down.
Haven't read all responses but i believe most are on my page too.. tough luck for them if they can't enjoy themselves without alcohol.
It is your day, your party and they are your guests.. if they are friends (and i stress IF) they will understand and behave.
Additionally you don't run the risk of some drunk fool crashing your wedding day by making a public fool of him/herself as we run the risk at my cousins wedding when one of our cousins wanted to get drunk (and we knew him to be an asshole when drunk). Luckily we could stop him right in his tracks and the party was wonderful.
Btw.. i only realize this now:
Heavy congratulations Hamudm on your wedding.. i remembered some of your threads way back when you talked about your parents and your relationship and how it was hard for them to accept her.
I don't know what happened but i'm glad you made a decision and stick by it (and it sounds like your family accepted that decision)
It is your day, your party and they are your guests.. if they are friends (and i stress IF) they will understand and behave.
Additionally you don't run the risk of some drunk fool crashing your wedding day by making a public fool of him/herself as we run the risk at my cousins wedding when one of our cousins wanted to get drunk (and we knew him to be an asshole when drunk). Luckily we could stop him right in his tracks and the party was wonderful.
Btw.. i only realize this now:
Heavy congratulations Hamudm on your wedding.. i remembered some of your threads way back when you talked about your parents and your relationship and how it was hard for them to accept her.
I don't know what happened but i'm glad you made a decision and stick by it (and it sounds like your family accepted that decision)
Really? Cuz all the ones I have been to have no booze... I sneak some, don't get me wrong
I've never been to a witness wedding without fountains of the stuff.
And I've been to a lot of witness weddings in my time.
And I've also been to my fair share of witness weddings
Really? Cuz all the ones I have been to have no booze... I sneak some, don't get me wrong
I've never been to a witness wedding without fountains of the stuff.
And I've been to a lot of witness weddings in my time.
And I've also been to my fair share of witness weddings
The religion has no prohibitions on alcohol consumption other than to practice moderation. Whether someone wishes to serve or imbibe alcohol is a conscience manner.
I spent from age 5 to age 20 as a witness so I'm quite conversant in their official rules.
You might be able to chalk the difference up in culture or region; some halls are more conservative than others in their make up, depending on the demographics of the area they are located.
******
As for the OP, it's your wedding and you can set the rules however you please. Period. Declining to serve alcohol at your wedding is perfectly within the realm of your rights and in the realm of acceptable norm, and if some of your guests are going to be big babies and throw tantrums about it, that's their shortcoming, not yours. The day isn't about them; it's about celebrating the new life that you and your bride are embarking upon.
Those that bitch about the missing booze are most likely the same that would get totally smashed and embarrass themselves or you, and you'd be better of without them. If they don't show, consider it a gain.
I think the compromise you have worked out is great and certainly goes above what you were required to accommodate. Ignore the overgrown toddlers who haven't learned there's a world outside of themselves and enjoy your big day. :thumbsup:
I've only ever been to one reception where alcohol wasn't served, and most of the people had left like an hour before the DJ was done with his paid time. It happened to be my friend's wedding where I was the maid of honor. Luckily the best man brought a flask so he, the bride and I could drink. It's really funny to me that she didn't have alcohol, cause she drinks a lot with me. It's basically because her grandma and all the other old people there wouldn't approve. Which I think it kind of shitty...just cause old people don't approve of drinking doesn't mean the people getting married shouldn't be able to do whatever they want at their own wedding.
That being said, if I ever get married, my entire wedding budget is going toward alcohol for the reception. I want everyone to get smashed. Then again, most of my close friends are borderline alcoholics.
But it's your prerogative to not have alcohol at your wedding. If people don't like it, that's their problem.
You shouldn't have your day ruined because people can't handle not drinking for a few hours.
That being said, if I ever get married, my entire wedding budget is going toward alcohol for the reception. I want everyone to get smashed. Then again, most of my close friends are borderline alcoholics.
But it's your prerogative to not have alcohol at your wedding. If people don't like it, that's their problem.
You shouldn't have your day ruined because people can't handle not drinking for a few hours.
We had an interesting challenge for our wedding as well, one side is Methodist and doesn't really drink the other catholic and well very catholic.
We found a balance by doing the drink ticket thing. While some people would bitch and moan about how you must pay for their drinks at your party I say tough shit. Get drunk and waste money on your own dime.
It should be perfectly fair to have a bar upstairs and if anyone does complain or leaves early well then it's one less person being a pill on your wedding. And trust me you won't really notice on the day there is so much going on around you it's a lot of a blur.
We found a balance by doing the drink ticket thing. While some people would bitch and moan about how you must pay for their drinks at your party I say tough shit. Get drunk and waste money on your own dime.
It should be perfectly fair to have a bar upstairs and if anyone does complain or leaves early well then it's one less person being a pill on your wedding. And trust me you won't really notice on the day there is so much going on around you it's a lot of a blur.
Going by the photos you've posted, it looks like everyone had a great time.
Well those who showed up, we had our own little drama. I think it's a requirement of all weddings.
My family sucks, but I never have to attend their stupid things now. Yay!
I would love to further discuss this with you if you are open to it
Well those who showed up, we had our own little drama. I think it's a requirement of all weddings.
Well, judging by the photos, I think you've conclusively proved that, to use a term from some TV show I'm currently obsessed with, the myth that it's necessary to provide endless amounts of alcohol at weddings is busted.
Well those who showed up, we had our own little drama. I think it's a requirement of all weddings.
Well, judging by the photos, I think you've conclusively proved that, to use a term from some TV show I'm currently obsessed with, the myth that it's necessary to provide endless amounts of alcohol at weddings is busted.
Thanks, and I can't imagine what TV show you're referring too.
Is it Dirty Jobs? It's Dirty Jobs isn't it.
No, it's Pushing Daisies.
One option I saw in a Miss Manners column is to do a punch bowl. It's an old-fashioned custom that may end up making a comeback because it's a way to provide alcohol that is relatively inexpensive plus it can be festive.
When you get right down to it though the day is about the two of you promising to spend the rest of your lives together - while you want to be hospitable it's not required for you to be entertaining.
When you get right down to it though the day is about the two of you promising to spend the rest of your lives together - while you want to be hospitable it's not required for you to be entertaining.
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