TOS Caption Contest #106 - Workout
- Thread starter Outpost4
- Start date
Spock: Captain, I did not think you were serious when you stated that we can argue about Sha'ka're until we were "blue in the face."
Kirk: "... and you get the Kohm, stuff his head down the toilet and flush. It's far more civilised, and I don't feel that I really need to demonstrate it again!"
Cloud William to Cloud Festus: "If we keep up the dumb native schtick, he'll be doing it all night. Best entertainment we've had all year."
Kirk: Bones... I've got space herpes!
Bones (off-camera): Again!
"It's saltwater taffy.
Don't worry...it's all nice and soft. Been carrying it in this hand since we beamed down."
SPOCK:"As the theoreticians predicted generations ago, Captain.
Bundt cakes fall in deep space."
Yang farts were the REAL biotoxic warfare agent that wrecked their civilization.
SPOCK: Captain, I believe it to be a lifeform composed of solid waste and bacteria.
McCoy: Damnit, Spock, you know that's Jim's stool sample. Now, spare us your infernal Vulcan attempts at humor.
-or-
Hoshi: What is it?
Trip: Yeah, Doc, it's strange.
Phlox: Feces, but not as we know it. And more and more keep appearing all over the ship.
Spock: If my experiment works, we may solve the great sanitation crisis of the 23rd century.
McCoy: Damnit, Spock, do you really think beaming it into the past is really solving the problem?
Kirk: "Not only are we going to Deneva, Cloud Festus, we're going to Andoria and Vulcan and Coridan and Pollux IV and Tellar Prime, and we're going to Organia and Gamma Canaris and Gamma Hydra IV ... And we're going to Memory Alpha and Janus VI and Scalos and Sigma Iota II, and then we're going to Earth, to take back the Federation! YEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Spock: "Captain, surely there are duties for which I am better suited than identifying which alien-STD you've acquired this week."
Kirk: "Mr. Spock, twenty minutes ago that 'blob' was my left testicle. I need answers and I need them now, dammit!"
Well Spock? What's your analysis?
Analysis incomplete, Captain. However I'm picking up trace minerals and amino acids indicative of biological processes.
It's a petrified alien bird turd, isn't it Spock.
I would not jump to conclusions, Doctor.
Bird turd.
Captain -
Nice work. Carry on, Mr Stork.
I got two!
Spock: Thank you, Captain, Doctor, but I'm afraid that I'm too old for an Easy Bake Oven.
McCoy: Why you ungrateful, green-blooded hobgoblin!
I got two!
Cloud William: "Are they two tickets to paradise, one named Kirk?"
SPOCK:"I have unfortunate news to report, Captain.
The rabbit not only died, but melted. Best avoid Yeoman Rand for the next nine solar months."
"Which one of you smelly Cro-Magnon sons-o-bitches wants to go see Manilow at the Garden with me?"