It's not all I want and being told you must feel something because it's that guy from that thing I know appears on screen is damn frustrating.
Like, I'm sorry that I want characters and story first.

I don't just want to be told "here you go little fan. Here's a treat." It feels condescending as I'll get out some times.
I understand the point, sort of. I don't agree with it. To me, I don't see it as "i'm supposed to feel something because it's the guy from the thing I know"... I see it as... "I feel something because of the relationship I have with the character I know"... I have established feelings about Picard and crew. You could do that same exact show, but make S1 about like, Old Captain Smithy who is feeling down and out, and misses his old friend who died Commander Information and then some things happen and Old Captain Smithy has to go out on an adventure that is actually somewhat related to his old freind Commander Information.... and like... it might be fine? But if you make it about Picard and Data, I already have a connection with those characters. I don't need to be told to feel anything. I already do.
I guess it's subjective. How much you put in, when, how obvious it is, which things you include and where, the proportion, whether it helps or hinders the story you put it in.
You may love a particular food like chocolate, but not in everything you eat, smell, wear, etc. has to have chocolate in it. You may love dogs, but if every gift people buy you is dog-themed, eventually, you want something else.
At some point, you want to be surprised by new things, find different things to also like, different places to explore that don't all look the same, try something else for a change, even if you go back to the old thing again sometimes. If nothing else, you appreciate what you get a break from.
It's the whole idea of Star Trek - going to new places and finding both old and new things.
That's fair and I generally agree with it. It is definitely subjective and I will counter your food analogy with a similar one. If I like steak, I may go to a steakhouse so I can steak. If I order steak and the waiter brings me out lasagna, I will probably be like "I ordered steak... that's why I came here." The waiter might be like "Yeah but, have you tried the lasanga?", to which point I might be like "Yeah this is fine, I like lasanga well enough, but I came to the steakhouse for steak."
The steak for me is Star Trek, and all the things that go along with it. When I watch Star Trek, I want it to be... Star Trek. I'm very happy for it to tell me new stories, but I want it to tell me new stories in a familiar style, because... that's what I came for.
Burnham being related to Spock never bothered me because that's not why I cared about the character.
This is why perspectives are fun. I honestly don't think I minded the relation to Spock... because there were SO many other reasons for me to dislike Burnham that it kind of got lost in the shuffle.
Where it bothers me is that THAT is my problem with "fan service" and "nostalgia". I'm cool with doing it. I'm a fan. Service me. That's cool. But... do it right. No, some new character showing up and being related to an old character I like doesn't do anything for me. That's some like, 1980's sitcom crap.
If you want to nostalgia? Maybe rather than trying to shoehorn in your new character as being related to an old one, just like, make the aliens you chose to use from the old shows like the aliens from the old shows? Rather than being like "Burnham is Spock's SISTER! Isn't that CRAZY?", they could be like "Hey guys look, KLINGONS! And they look like Klingons!"
I preferred when command was gold but TNG fucked that up and used red because...
They thought Patrick Stewart looked better in red than gold.
From a purely aesthetic standpoint, I think this works. I think the red pops a bit more, which in turn almost makes more sense for it be a bit less common. The captain and the first officer wear red, the wear the gold. The red being a bit more bold of a look makes the command officers stand out.
Although, it's never been much of an issue either way for me. I do wish Discovery had kept the department colors. I don't actually hate the DSC uniforms. They do seem like an evolution from the ENT-era, but... the weird metallic department color scheme was kind of dumb.