I tried to like this episode.
But, after all the hype for months from Robert Meyer Burnett, and after people like Dave Cullen, The Critical Drinker, and Nerdrotic liked it, I wanted to give season 3 a chance. I actually looked forward to it.
This was supposed to be a "return to form". Alex Kurtzman and Akiva Goldsman are not directly involved. Characters behave like they are supposed to. It's not a giant kindergarten in space.
But this ain't it.
Star Trek Picard season 1 and especially season 2 are the worst NuTrek seasons. This season starts better, but this episode is not good.
After all the hype, I'm very disappointed with this episode.
It's a bare-bones story with a myriad of problems: The quality of the CGI, the darkness of the sets, Raffi, small universe syndrome, mystery boxes, ETC.
The best character so far is Riker. Unlike Picard, he is at least energetic. I like him the most, despite that he made a questionable decision early on.
My two biggest problems: Picard and Starfleet
Despite all the proclamations about how different this season is supposed to be, I see many similarities with S1.
1) Patrick Stewart is still playing low-T JL, not Jean-Luc Picard.
He is playing a frail old man with a weak voice and no commanding presence.
Patrick Stewart's demeanor is doddering.
All this stilted pseudo-deep talk about "the past", "the future" and JL's legacy. I can't stand it.
2) Picard has no ship and needs a ride. Again.
The show is repeating a story beat from S1 in the worst way possible.
2.1) That Picard has no access to a ship, not even a warp-capable shuttle or a runabout, I already found problematic in S1. Why is this even a story beat at all?
In "All Good Things" he had no ship because 1) it was a Q reality and 2) he had a mental illness.
But here?
And he has nobody, NOBODY, outside of Starfleet that he can call for help (like in S1)? Nobody? Picard?
2.2) How Starfleet is portrayed in S1 and S3 in Picard's quest to get a ship is a huge problem for me.
S1: First, he contacted Admiral Sheer Fucking Hubris and we all know how that went. Starfleet is portrayed as antagonistic towards Picard.
Then he contacted an ex-Starfleet officer, who loathed Starfleet, who contacted another ex-Starfleet officer, who had an antipathy for Starfleet.
Our crew consisted of 3 ex-Starfleet officers who had an antipathy for Starfleet and the highest-ranking Starfleet officer we met is outright hostile toward Picard.
In S3 we have a similar situation. Don't people see the similarities?
S3: Captain Shaw, the highest ranking Starfleet officer beside the TNG legacy characters, is hostile towards them. And 7of9 has doubts about her career in Starfleet and staying in Starfleet.
Discovery is all about: "We are Starfleet" "We love Starfleet long time"
PIC is again portraying Starfleet in a negative way.
2.3) How exactly did a RETIRED Admiral and a Captain think they are going to take over a ship? That plan was stupid.
People compare this TWoK. But this is completely different. Have people actually watched TWoK and understood the context?
Admiral Kirk was a senior officer at the Starfleet academy in charge of cadet training.
As part of his duties, he legally inspect a ship with a new crew and ordered a training mission. As it was in his authority to do so.
When the first pieces of information about how the season would start were released and I heard that Picard needed a ship to help Beverly, I expected that he would legally get command of the Titan, similar to what Riker did in All Good Things with the Enterprise-D.
I didn't expect that I would get a storyline where Picard and Riker go rogue and try to illegally get command of a ship, and get 7of9 to mutiny
I hate this plot. How is this "return to form"?
I can't express how much I hate his storyline.
JL and Riker need a ride and the first thing they come up with is fake an inspection to illegally get command of a ship.
17 minutes into the first episode Picard and Riker plan an insurrection.
I'm surprised that nobody seems to have an issue with that.
I don't know what is worse, that they came up with this plan or that they thought it would work.
How could they possibly think this plan would work? Especially on a ship with a Captain that is hostile towards them, and Rike knows this.
Why did they think a retired admiral and a captain can order an inspection?
A retired admiral, also known as an ex-admiral, also known as a civilian, has no command authority anymore.
And why would a random captain be capable of ordering an inspection of a random ship?
And why did Riker choose the Titan?
Riker says because it's his former command it's the only "sway" he got.
So what is it? Official authority or "sway"?
Are he and Picard trying to pull rank and order an inspection? In that case, they could have chosen any ship (preferably with a non-hostile). Or is he asking for a favor?
Keep in mind this is not his former crew and he knows the captain is hostile toward him. So what "sway" does Riker thinks he has on the Titan?
That this is supposedly the only "sway" Riker has also cast a bad light on him and Starfleet in another aspect.
Why does he have such a low standing with Starfleet? This is depicting Starfleet in a negative light, again.
Why does he not know anybody in Starfleet whom he can ask for a favor? Why does he seem to be isolated, shunned, or looked down upon? That's what it looks like if he doesn't have "sway" anywhere else.
In short, I don't like the similarities with season 1:
- Low-T JL
- The portrayal of Starfleet:
- Starfleet is comprised, again. Like in season 1.
- High-ranking Starfleet officers disdain JL, again. Like in season 1.
- JL has people around him people who either hate Starfleet and are out of Starfleet, have doubts about beginning in Starfleet, or have a low standing in Starfleet. Like in season 1.
Lots of other problems:
Beverly Crusher and the shootout:
Locking her son up was a stupid move.
She cut herself off from 50% firepower/50% manpower and deprived herself of basic tactical options that a two-man fire team offers, like cover fire and flanking, or giving the other team member first aid if he/she is injured and unconscious.
Beverly was very lucky that her ship was only border by two enemies.
But even if only two intruders she was outnumbered. Imagine if this was a 2vs2 and not 1vs2.
She was also lucky that she was still conscious at the end of the shootout so that she could free her son so that he could put her into the stasis chamber.
Cutting yourself off from help is not smart. Her son is not a helpless child. He is an adult. He could have helped.
Why did the ships not follow her?
Beverly Crusher and her message:
That Picard reached Beverly is sheer luck.
There is a chain of improbable events that had to happen so that Picard got the message.
Why did Beverly send the message to the communicator?
The Enterprise-D was destroyed 40 years ago.
This is just another fan service/nostalgia bait so that they can show the TNG communicator and it's done in the worst possible way so that the camera can linger for 30s on the communicator (Look! It's the Enterprise D communicator! Oh My God!) It looks clumsy, it hurts the story flow.
This doesn't do anything for the story. It doesn't move the story forward. It's just nostalgic filler.
If Picard had not been in hearing range of the communicator when the message arrived he would have missed it.
There is no reasonable way to explain why she expected the communicator to be near him and not in the basement or in the attic.
Picard, out of the blue, knows to use the "Myriad" codec.
Beverly has an additional layer of obfuscation to hide the coordinates.
She used knowledge from an incident that she can't expect Picard to have, because she specifically knew Picard was incapacitated during that incident.
I guess we have to find a way to bring up Locutus every season.
Did she expect Picard to read up on the Hellbird virus? She had to because otherwise, he would have needed to ask someone, and she specifically said "trust no one".
She bet her life on so many expectations and assumptions.
The reason why Picard asked Riker about the coordinates was that there was nothing at the coordinates and that made him skeptical.
Well, you can get stranded in deep space. There is no reason to expect that you can only get stranded in a solar system or in a nebula.
Just because there is nothing at the coordinates doesn't mean you can't get stranded there.
Imagine Picard told Riker "we need to go to these coordinates" and then they wasted a bunch of time.
Did Beverly come up with this obfuscation scheme after she was wounded or in advance?
So man lucky assumptions and coincidences to bet your life on.
All of this could have been avoided very easily.
Beverly could have sent an encrypted message to Picard's normal eMail/VoIP/IM address (or whatever the Star Trek equivalent is), obfuscated the coordinates, and then said "Bozeman".
Codec:
The writers don't know what a "codec" is.
Codecs are about compression, not encryption.
The computer starts to explain that it is about compressions (so some writers have to know about it), but Picard cuts the computer off, and in the rest of the episode it is about encryption.
Pump-action phaser weapons:
It's lazy and stupid.
It's lazy because you can clearly see that the prop does not have any moving parts.
Beverly moves her hand back and forth along the handguard and you can hear a pump-action sound effect added in post-production.
It's stupid because it's made by someone who has no idea how pump-action weapons work. They put it in the show because they think it's cool.
Why is there a physical motion?
In IRL, you pump a shotgun to remove the spent shell from the chamber and move a new shell from the tube magazine into the chamber.
What is the pump motion supposed to move internally?
You can clearly see that nothing gets ejected (more laziness from the prop/VFX department).
You can also see that pumping the weapon, fires the weapon. So much for aiming. That is peak stupidity.
A little bit of effort would have helped.
The writers could have come up with a reason for a pump-action weapon, like a new miniature photon shell or something. Anything but the "rule of cool".
Something like: The enemies have personal shields and she has to use an anti-personal shield miniature photon shell.
Raffi:
I can't stand Raffi.
Why does Raffi think that a street-level drug dealer (he directly sells drugs to junkies) has any information about weapons smuggling and terrorist activities?
And it turns out, she is right! The low-level drug dealer did know something! Of course in the vaguest mystery box way possible. "Red Lady".
This investigation subplot is just tiresome.
Raffi uses the 25th-century equivalent of Google and searches for "Red Lady", and when she finds nothing she gets angry and destroys a Pad. Typical good old angry Raffi.
Then she searches for important upcoming events and surprises! Investigation completed.
Remember when Data investigated the parasite conspiracy or the assassination attempt at the Klingon governor or the death of ambassador T'Pel or the many investigations conducted by Odo or Tuvok?
All more interesting and engaging.
Seven:
I don't care if she liked being in Starfleet or not.
If she doesn't like it, she should leave. She can be a ranger again (whatever that means. We still don't know what rangers do). But stop complaining to Picard about how oppressive rules are.
Very lucky for Picard and Riker that she does not like her Captain. What a coincidence.
Mystery Boxes!
- What is Myriad?
- What is Hellbird?
- Who/What is the Red Lady?
- Who is Raff's handler?
- Why did Beverly cut off Picard and the rest?
- Who is the father?
- Who is the enemy?
What happened to 25th-century medicine?
Who cares about coherent worldbuilding? Jokes are more important!
Interesting that in a society where money is not important, there is an "above my pay grade" saying to express the importance and hierarchy of people.
More sloppy writing and injecting modern vernacular into the 25th century.
A "former ex-Borg" is a Borg again.
It's either "former Borg" or "ex-Borg".
Is nobody proofreading these scripts?
Looks like nobody cares.
"arbitrarily added 3 to every digit"
It's either "added 3 to arbitrary digits" or "added 3 to every digit".
"To every" means it's not arbitrary.
"This stolen weapon is an act of war"
Shouldn't it read:
"Stealing this weapon was an act of war"
Stealing, even military secrets, is an act of war? Don't know about that.
They don't know who stole the weapon. It could be a criminal or terrorist organization.
Criminal or a terrorist organisation can't commit acts of war.
Only other polities can commit acts of war.
Cursing:
- goddamn
- shit
- son of a bitch
Hello darkness my old friend:
It's better than seasons two and one so far.
3/10