Mental Wellness Support Group

[Twilight Phoenix]

I just meant that, sometimes, togetherness can establish some very good coping mechanisms, depending on the couple.

Oh yes ! Totally !! As I said earlier, I'm convinced our social environment does count a lot in the way we manage symptoms and day-to-day life

 

[TrickyDickie]

I would like to recommend a couple of books:

1) 'Awakenings' by Oliver Sacks. The story of encephalitis lethargica. The film was well done, but the book was even better. I have read several of Sacks' books and sometimes his tone can seem like he was impatient, but I do believe that he was a very good doctor....a human one, not a robot.

2) 'Johnny Got His Gun' by Dalton Trumbo. That is a novel about a soldier in World War I who is severely injured in combat. What would your mental state be like if you lost both arms, both legs, both eyes, both ears, your nose, and your lower jaw? Johnny nevertheless manages to find happiness and figures out a way to communicate. That story is one of the most powerful in all of fiction, about the triumph of the human spirit, in my opinion. It makes the stoicism of the ambulance driver at the end of Hemingway's 'A Farewell to Arms' seem like very small potatoes. Whenever health problems start really getting me down, I think about that story and it pulls me right back up again.

 

[Riker'sMailbox]

@Gryffindorian , yes! I have OCD. It started as post partum OCD (which can often be temporary) but I waited a while to get treatment and it developed in OCD.

I am open about it. I often get asked about hand washing and the like and I have to explain that those are compulsions and I get intrusive thoughts which is on the obsessive side of this disorder.

Aversion therapy helped immensely, but it is a harsh treatment. But, my OCD was triggered by a few very specific things, so my doc thought I was a good candidate for AT.

Anyway, feel free to pick my brain for all things OCD. As I said, I am totally open about it and would love to help if I could.

 

[TrickyDickie]

My OCD is very diverse. Get something stuck between my teeth, know that floss or a toothpick or a brush or whatever will easily get it out. But, no. Have to work at it and work at it with my tongue. The OCD demands that method. Giving in to an easy method is like a huge surrender.

I will page through memory for hours on end trying to track down something very obscure. We have a neighbor with a rather annoying voice. The first time I heard it, I said to myself "I have heard a tonal quality VERY similar in someone's voice in a movie....now which one was it?" Finally tracked down the memory and matched it. It was a very minor character in the movie 'Trading Places' which I had not seen in a lot of years....and the character had very little screen time.

I find that I am quite good at recognizing actors' faces and voices quite quickly, as they are today, even if I have not seen or heard them since they were much younger in movies decades ago. I sort of visualize an overlay that starts blinking when there is a match. Reminds me of the whale song search in TVH.

So, I guess OCD *can* help strengthen memory, with those exercises.

But when a memory just won't come, and I am proverbially ready to bite my fingers off from frustration (it can build up to almost like a panic attack) and have to consult the internet to look up an actor....that's another huge surrender.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

It gets sickening telling people that lack of diet and exercise and "Just consume less than you burn" [...]are grossly oversimplified.

I couldn't agree more. In my case it turned out that I was grossly overweight because I am a type 2 diabetic with a rather strong insulin resistance (a bit simplified that means that though there is enough insulin to split food into glucosis, the glucosis can't get into the cells. The liver then filters it out of the blood and turns it into fat, thinking the cells already had as much as they needed. This way you starve to death while getting fat).

Btw, a fact that frequently gets overlooked: diabetes very often triggers anxiety and depression (that is because in diabetics the cells don't get enough sugar. When the nerve cells start to starve they cause malfunctions = depression and anxiety). I had 1 1/2 years of therapy and took meds for 2 years for nothing. What I would have needed was treatment of my undiscovered diabetes.
The instant I started taking Metformin (the most common diabetes med) my depressions were gone. Occasionally, I still get fits of anxiety but that's mostly when I have forgotten to take my diabetes meds.

@Gryffindorian: you're welcome
How do you manage to do the meditation? I'd love to do that, too, but in order to meditate I need to be calm. How does one slip into the necessary calmness when one has a panic attack? I've tried Valerian drops - with me they work splendidly with minor anxiety but not with a full fit. The side effect is that I've gotten very popular with my neighbour's cats (Valerian scent is to cats what chocolate is to us)

 

[Gryffindorian]

@Gryffindorian , yes! I have OCD. It started as post partum OCD (which can often be temporary) but I waited a while to get treatment and it developed in OCD.

I am open about it. I often get asked about hand washing and the like and I have to explain that those are compulsions and I get intrusive thoughts which is on the obsessive side of this disorder.

Aversion therapy helped immensely, but it is a harsh treatment. But, my OCD was triggered by a few very specific things, so my doc thought I was a good candidate for AT.

Anyway, feel free to pick my brain for all things OCD. As I said, I am totally open about it and would love to help if I could.

Thanks, @Riker'sMailbox! I have been doing great (much better than before) this past year and a half. After I completed the eight-week mindfulness program at the end of 2016, I asked my therapist to give me a referral to an Acceptance and Commitment Therapy seminar, should it be offered at the medical offices near me. I haven't heard back from him ... but as I got better, I just sort of put it on the backburner. I'm still interested in the class, though.

 

[Gryffindorian]

My OCD is very diverse. Get something stuck between my teeth, know that floss or a toothpick or a brush or whatever will easily get it out. But, no. Have to work at it and work at it with my tongue. The OCD demands that method. Giving in to an easy method is like a huge surrender.

I will page through memory for hours on end trying to track down something very obscure. We have a neighbor with a rather annoying voice. The first time I heard it, I said to myself "I have heard a tonal quality VERY similar in someone's voice in a movie....now which one was it?" Finally tracked down the memory and matched it. It was a very minor character in the movie 'Trading Places' which I had not seen in a lot of years....and the character had very little screen time.

I find that I am quite good at recognizing actors' faces and voices quite quickly, as they are today, even if I have not seen or heard them since they were much younger in movies decades ago. I sort of visualize an overlay that starts blinking when there is a match. Reminds me of the whale song search in TVH.

So, I guess OCD *can* help strengthen memory, with those exercises.

But when a memory just won't come, and I am proverbially ready to bite my fingers off from frustration (it can build up to almost like a panic attack) and have to consult the internet to look up an actor....that's another huge surrender.

Have you been diagnosed with OCD or some form of anxiety? One thing that bothers me (and I'm not necessarily referring to you in this case) is when people use the term "OCD" loosely to refer to meticulous personal habits such as washing hands frequently and keeping things very organized. OCD is much more than that; if it doesn't bother you, then it can't be that bad. It consists of obsessions (unwelcome thoughts) and compulsions (rituals to try to make oneself feel better). These can be debilitating to the point that they affect one's daily life.

And in my case, Prozac has done wonders. I'm not suggesting that everyone take pills. There are other options. But there's certainly nothing wrong with taking meds. It's almost as if our society has been conditioned into thinking that pharmaceuticals are the bane of existence. Well, I've got news for those who think that way. I also have family histories of Type 2 diabetes, hypertension, and high cholesterol. Not all of us have disease-free genes; sometimes lifestyle changes aren't enough. I'm very thankful for my meds and access to great health care provided by my employer.

 

[TrickyDickie]

OCD officially diagnosed several months ago. Yes, obsessions and compulsions. Not to the point of being 'harmful' per se, but definitely on the intrusive side and taking up time that could be used elsewhere in more constructive ways, etc.

When possible, I attempt to 'harness' it and at least make some use of it. It can get quite interesting. I'm hoping that by doing that it will also help to keep it from getting worse. Sort of a form of management. Time will tell whether it works or not.

 

[Gryffindorian]

my diabetes meds.

@Gryffindorian: you're welcome
How do you manage to do the meditation? I'd love to do that, too, but in order to meditate I need to be calm. How does one slip into the necessary calmness when one has a panic attack? I've tried Valerian drops - with me they work splendidly with minor anxiety but not with a full fit. The side effect is that I've gotten very popular with my neighbour's cats (Valerian scent is to cats what chocolate is to us)

@rhubarbodendron, there are a lot of misconceptions about mindfulness and meditation, and "needing to be calm" is one of them. Meditation is not a goal, but a process. It's not about trying to achieve a blank mind, which is impossible anyway.

Meditation is defined as focusing on a single thing or thought to the exclusion of all others. There are different kinds of meditation - eating, walking, or the more traditional form of sitting meditation.

Mindfulness, a form of meditation, is a state of being aware of the present moment (the here and now), free of any judgment, be it good or bad. You can be at the supermarket and or in line at the Post Office and still be mindful.

The kind of meditation I practice daily is mindfulness (sitting) meditation, which requires only a quiet (like my bedroom), safe (not in a dark alley), and uncluttered space that's free from distractions. It involves sitting upright in a comfortable position and focusing on my breaths. The mind always wanders, but the key is to gently bring one's attention back to the present. That is mindful meditation in a nutshell. You may get the benefit of a sense of calm when you take deep breaths, but even that isn't the goal of meditation. Some may experience painful emotions too when they're meditating - grief, anxiety, anger, frustration - but there's no need to label or try to control these things. Sitting with one's thoughts and emotions non-judgmentally is the very essence of mindfulness.

I've downloaded an app on all my mobile devices called "Stop Breathe and Think," which has a timer and various pre-recorded guided meditations. I've been using it for over two years.

 

[Leviathan]

can't say I understand the stigma...so far every person I've ever met was fighting some sort of internal battle I knew nothing of. The smart ones asked for help....wish I could get more.

 

[Twilight Phoenix]

The smart ones asked for help....

This is actually a misconception too to imagine that people who don't seek help for their mental disoders aren't being 'smart'. The problem with our culture is that it teaches us to be ashamed and afraid of our disorders, which makes it very hard for people to aknowledge their issues and ask for help. Many would rather try to shake it off or ignore it because it's what they've been taught to do from childhood.
For some people, it can also be intimidating, even terrifying, to meet and talk to a total stranger. Because of the shame, the fear of judgement, sometimes trust issues, many people have difficulties reaching for a therapist. That's why other types of options should be available.

 

[TrickyDickie]

a blank mind, which is impossible anyway.

You might be unaware of this:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3784796/

That also ties in to 'The Zone'. I have to be very careful when I'm driving and keep my concentration, because I have had instances in which I have been so involved with thinking about other things that when I suddenly 'come back to the present' I have found that I am 50 miles or whatever farther along than I remembered traversing. It can be very scary to realize that you were on 'autopilot' and your body performed all of the necessary maneuvers in perfect control but you have no conscious memory of it. I have had to pull over at times and calm down after that has happened. It is very different from going to sleep behind the wheel, which I have experienced for brief moments. Today, I am hyper-vigilant to prevent either from happening again.

I have never sleepwalked (that I know of) but that is related in some ways.

 

[Twilight Phoenix]

I have had instances in which I have been so involved with thinking about other things that when I suddenly 'come back to the present' I have found that I am 50 miles or whatever farther along than I remembered traversing. It can be very scary to realize that you were on 'autopilot' and your body performed all of the necessary maneuvers in perfect control but you have no conscious memory of it.

I didn't know about mind blanking and this is very interesting, thanks for sharing !
The symptoms you describe are very similar to the ones I experience when going throught dissociative episodes. This is something I still have difficulties talking about...I'm okay with my anxiety disorder, but dissociation still makes me feel ashamed and 'defective'...
In the worst dissociative episodes, I don't feel physiological needs (hunger, tiredness, thirst...) anymore. I have difficulties sleeping, I can't get anything done because I don't have any focus anymore, and thus driving becomes extremely dangerous since my mind is kind of totally disconnected from reality

 

[TrickyDickie]

I didn't know about mind blanking and this is very interesting, thanks for sharing !
The symptoms you describe are very similar to the ones I experience when going throught dissociative episodes. This is something I still have difficulties talking about...I'm okay with my anxiety disorder, but dissociation still makes me feel ashamed and 'defective'...
In the worst dissociative episodes, I don't feel physiological needs (hunger, tiredness, thirst...) anymore. I have difficulties sleeping, I can't get anything done because I don't have any focus anymore, and thus driving becomes extremely dangerous since my mind is kind of totally disconnected from reality ​

You are NOT defective!

I believe that all people experience these things....I believe the difference is in levels. It's not being disconnected from reality....it's being less in touch with what could be called 'usual'....and personally, I don't qualify that as an abnormality. How much of an infinite range in the levels is unknown, because it is unreported? Consider that statistics and such are only compiled from reports. The whole field is still largely in its infancy.

 

[TrickyDickie]

Consider this:

How very often do we hear people talk about time feeling as if it has slowed down when there is an accident, disaster, terrorism, some type of crisis situation?

That tells me that dissociation is a quite 'normal' phenomenon.

It's simply not yet well understood how it works.

But I believe that it is present in all humans. For some, it is just more 'active'.

 

[Twilight Phoenix]

Thank you <3

 

[Steven P Bastien]

Consider this:

How very often do we hear people talk about time feeling as if it has slowed down when there is an accident, disaster, terrorism, some type of crisis situation?

That tells me that dissociation is a quite 'normal' phenomenon.

It's simply not yet well understood how it works.

But I believe that it is present in all humans. For some, it is just more 'active'.

I definitely had those dissociation type events, and always thought it was normal, perhaps a bit like daydreaming. I was not even aware it could become a problem, so I'm glad I learned at least that much. Looking back though, maybe I could have been borderline at one time because in high school some of my friends gave me the nickname "spaceman". I never took offense to it but I would sometimes daydream very deeply and not even hear someone talking to me. Or, maybe that's something else entirely, - not sure. It does not happen any more, but I still daydream a lot and it's an advantage to me in my profession, as an engineer.

 

[TrickyDickie]

When you also consider that out on the frontier of the quantum, researchers are wrestling with how what is observed / observable may depend a lot on the observer, I believe that human 'mental architecture' and the universe (s) at large may be closely connected.

We may have one foot here and the other somewhere else.

Which would bring about many implications.

At this point, I rule out nothing. Human science is too young.

 

[Gryffindorian]

You might be unaware of this:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3784796/

That also ties in to 'The Zone'. I have to be very careful when I'm driving and keep my concentration, because I have had instances in which I have been so involved with thinking about other things that when I suddenly 'come back to the present' I have found that I am 50 miles or whatever farther along than I remembered traversing. It can be very scary to realize that you were on 'autopilot' and your body performed all of the necessary maneuvers in perfect control but you have no conscious memory of it. I have had to pull over at times and calm down after that has happened. It is very different from going to sleep behind the wheel, which I have experienced for brief moments. Today, I am hyper-vigilant to prevent either from happening again.

I have never sleepwalked (that I know of) but that is related in some ways.

That's different because it refers to a state of unconsciousness like "Anybody home?" or someone "spacing out." I had an old friend who had suffered a massive stroke before she died 15 years ago, and at times she was in and out of consciousness. Sometimes she was nonresponsive when people talked to her.

Even when we say that someone is "drawing a blank," that's just an expression to indicate one's inability to remember something or come up with the right word or phrase.

I'm referring to people's misconception of attaining a blank or empty state of mind while in a conscious or lucid state. One simply can't not think. Try not to think of a flying pink elephant, and what happens?

That's not what meditation is or is about. As I stated, meditation and mindfulness are processes, not the end results. One doesn't have to be calm and relaxed before or when practicing mindfulness, although equanimity tends to be one of the rewards.

 

[TrickyDickie]

I'm referring to people's misconception of attaining a blank or empty state of mind while in a conscious or lucid state. One simply can't not think. Try not to think of a flying pink elephant, and what happens?

Well, I will try to describe what goes on inside my mind.

I have a vibrant imagination. But....I have to concentrate to 'populate' it with images. I have to take a pro-active role with it. I have to put forth effort to think. In an 'ordinary' state, it is blank. Not white, not black, just....absent. I don't have constant images of some kind running through my mind in every waking moment. Quite the contrary. When I want to daydream, I have to concentrate on doing so.

My everyday life, to a large degree, is whatever is in front of my eyes. If I choose to think about something else at the same time, I can, but it isn't automatic.

One effect that this has is that I have been told many times that I notice finer details about my surroundings that other people might miss.

The flying pink elephant? It is now words on a page here, because that's what is right in front of me. In my mind, I broke the image down into something like pixels and swept it away.

On the other side of the spectrum, I do a lot of vivid dreaming. And sometimes things from the future are incorporated into my dreams. On a Friday night, I dreamed of seeing black smoke on the horizon and then two large helicopters passed overhead, going from northeast to southwest. This was near a local lake. On Saturday, I went down to the lake. Before long, a large milk tanker crashed nearby, caught fire, and sent thick, black smoke billowing into the sky. (The driver was okay.) On Sunday, I went back to the lake. In the course of my time there, two large helicopters passed overhead, going from northeast to southwest.



This does not even scratch the surface of the strange life that I have lived so far....